We may doubt at times, wondering if our departed loved ones are still with us in any way. Have faith in them, and their continued loving presence in our lives.
Karen writes:
“It has been over four years now since I have been with Marcus in physical form. Although I no longer cry tears on a daily basis, I think of him, talk to him, miss him every day, and love him all the time. Now and then, I still shed tears and the grief overwhelms me. This was the case as the holidays were coming. I miss him so much during that time. Marcus was/is an amazing gift giver, and used to spoil me around the holidays and birthdays. He did this for his entire family.”
“Since his passing on to heaven, he continues to give me signs and gifts around the holidays and birthdays – including his birthday. This year, Christmas day came and went and although I exchanged a gift with him in his stocking, I felt lonely. I was talking to him in my mind, and lamenting the fact that all of the gifts I have given him since his passing, are just really gifts to myself, hanging on a special jewelry tree stand in my room.”
“I typically give him a special ornament every year, and have quite a collection now, including hearts, feathers, dandelions, and more. Everything has a meaning or a connection to Marcus. This year, I gave him a silver heart. Usually, we would exchange gifts on Christmas eve, but this year that night was so busy that I had to postpone our exchange until Christmas night.”
“That evening, I gave him the silver heart, and wondered secretly why he had not given me anything this year that I could call a true sign. It would have been the first Christmas to come and go without an obvious sign from him since his passing. Although I understand the nature of signs, and that we can’t depend on them, my heart was missing this at this time of year.”
“I was driving the next day, the day after Christmas, and was again thinking about our gift exchange. I even apologized for being late this year and asked him if he liked his heart. I got home from my errands, and took the doggies out for our daily walk. As we were walking, I was still thinking of Marcus, and missing him. I was listening to my ‘heaven’ playlist, songs that he has sent me over the years, and it made me feel closer to him.”
Karen’s Christmas Coins
“As I approached my house again, rounding out from the walk, a sparkle caught my eye. I saw a dime right in front of my driveway, and reached down to pick it up. I looked further, and noticed another, then another, and still another- I looked around to see if maybe someone had a purse that emptied while I was out for my walk- looking for an explanation. As my eyes scanned the area, I saw more and more dimes. Now they appeared sprinkled in front of my entire front lawn. It was as if someone threw a roll of dimes in the air right in front of my house.”
Karen’s Christmas Coins
“Oddly, it was only dimes. No other coins…. all in all 16 dimes! I was laughing- giddy- just filled with joy at this obvious gift as I collected up the dimes. Marcus gave me the feeling of joy, as if he had gotten me with his sense of humor – making me think he had forgotten. In my mind he was saying that he was glad I found them before the snow storm set in later that day. I am so forever grateful for his continued signs and presence in my life.”
Commentary- Many people receive signs from, or feel the presence of a deceased loved one after they have passed. Some recognize the signs right away while others, who remain open to the possibility, take a little longer to see them. Some people have to be taught to recognize them. Then there are those frustrated believer grievers that don’t believe they receive anything at all. No signs, no after-death communications, no nothing. Then, they go straight to some version of, “What’s wrong with me that I don’t get them?” “Doesn’t my loved one care?”
For those in the latter category, those signs, and the feeling of their loved ones presence may already be happening, but be misinterpreted as some sort of coincidence or wishful thinking. Some may not even be aware, as the fear and trauma of a death has the ability to put one’s state of mind anywhere but in the present. I will discuss this more in one of my next posts entitled, “There’s No Place Like the Present” as it relates to grief.
In the state of grief, many people discount spiritual experiences as inauthentic, as they focus more on the painful reality of their new life. Their priority may be about dealing more with the physical shock and pain, and less about spiritually tuning in. There may be so much negative emotional trauma, it can be easy to miss their departed loved ones support through all the grief and pain. It’s like the pain is so loud in our heads, that the comfort can’t be heard or felt. This is truly a confusing time of crisis, where the upheaval of one’s life practically upends all sense of stability, perception and faith. It takes a while to recover to a state of normality and familiarity.
But, at some point, we might become aware of the comfort that has been there in the midst of the sadness. We might begin to notice the signs because we can now be reached… we are now available. We might now be able to hear a little better, as the noise of devastation settles down a bit.
Whether or not we have been aware of signs or our loved ones presence, they are there, I’m sure. But sometimes, they are very subtile and take a particular way of looking and listening that is unlike that of the looking/listening we are used to in this physical realm.
I have received hundreds of signs from people who have lost a loved one. They are immortalized within the pages of this site, along with numerous after-death communications. Signs look like rainbows, dragonflies and other winged things, cloud projections of angels and hearts, the unexplained sudden and surprising appearance of coins, as was Karen’s experience.
There are literal signs on the road, on a billboard or a license plate. There are far too many to list here, but the thing about them being something special, is the enlightened feeling that this sign is a personal message to that one receiving it. It is the feeling of being “singled out” in an obvious and meaningful way that is hard to deny. More times than not, you absolutely know it when it happens, but still might ask yourself, “Am I going crazy?” At first you might think you are.
Often, we can feel their presence. As we listen and feel, it may come in quiet moments of reflection that often manifest as a feeling of being hugged or touched and a tingling sensation that follows. Their voice might pop into our heads, or a literal message might manifest in a show or song. You might catch a scent that is associated only to the departed. You might even briefly see them.
These simple spiritual manifestations make it possible for us to know and feel comfort that our loved ones still exist. Signs are given to show those left behind, that they are not going through this devastating time alone. Although it is exceedingly painful to go through the pain of grief, we may feel some sort of comfort and support from our departed loved one.
If you just close your eyes and take a deep breath of reassurance, it is possible to feel them next to you. No, it’s not like when they were in the physical realm, but we take what we can get, for things are different now and we must get used to it. But, do not let your brain deceive you, just because you can’t experience in the ways you always did, it doesn’t mean they ever left. It doesn’t make sense that they would leave us in our greatest time of need. Would you do that to your loved ones? Love as powerful as it is, would not be stopped by heaven or hell. There are so many signs and after-death communications, from so many people to prove it.
As far as a time frame, as it relates to their presence, contrary to what some say, it has been my experience that signs and after-death communications don’t have an expiration date. There is no expiration date that prevents them from being by our side, cheering us on on our challenging path of life. It’s been 3 years for Karen. Marcus is still around, even giving gifts and teasing her the way he always had. But as time goes on, sometimes, they’re more silent than before.
One day, not feeling much of a presence from our departed loved one, we may wonder. Have they gone somewhere? As we get further from those darkest days of our loss, it seems they frequent us less and less. This is not to be confused with the thinking that they have actually left us alone, they are just not revealing themselves in our lives. At least, this is what Christian taught me after his passing.
At some point on our grief path, it will be time to bravely step forward. One step and then another, and so on. Of course, we have the pain of our loss and miss them desperately, as we are forced to step forward into an uncertain future without their physical presence. If we are to experience the depth of our feelings as a human, learn from our losses, deal with our emotions, evolve and heal from our deepest pain and have faith in a new future, this is all part of it. This is part of experiencing life and what it is to be human.
But… this is not to say they won’t pop in periodically, and put that big smile on our face, or even make us giddy, as Karen was with Marcus’ gift of dimes. This life is our school, with many tests. There will be times that we must be left to ourselves for the hardest, most growth promoting parts of our learning. Being tested on it, we become stronger and get to know ourselves in a deeper way than ever before. Through this process called life, we are allowed to develop ourselves in deeper ways than had we not had our tough challenges.
Yes, it’s really sad that our loved ones are gone (out of sight, that is), and of course, we could never forget them, but, at some point our loved ones make themselves scarce. Although this is incredibly difficult, we need to get back to some semblance of life if we are ever to move through our grief. This is so we can deal, learn, grow & develop and heal. But this is usually a long way into the grief process.
At the beginning, we so desperately need our loved one’s support and to be reassured. These signs and after-death communications go a long way toward that end, as well as, developing for ourselves the faith in an afterlife and the promise that we will see them again.
I love Karen’s graceful and peaceful attitude. Although she is hopeful Marcus will manifest, she is understanding, humble and calm in the case that he doesn’t. Undeniably, she if confident in the strength of their spiritual bond together, and that something as simple as physical death (also a part of life), could never break it. Karen is faithful. Karen is peaceful.
We may have doubts at times. That’s a human thing. But just remember who your loved one was on Earth, trust in their love and caring. Have some faith in them and their continued loving presence in our lives. You will be much more peaceful for it.
Blessings for a peaceful healing journey.
