Category Archives: Loss

Loss is a part of life, whether it’s the loss of something cherished, such as a ring or the loss life from a person who was loved. In this life, though we lose sometimes, we also gain, too. Our job is to accept that both loss and gain are a part of the human condition.

Music From the Afterlife

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With songs from beyond, Don has begun singing daily to his sweetheart, Judy, of 61 years past, when their upcoming date was interrupted by his death.

Judy writes:
“Don, the man I was falling in love with goes back over 61 years. He last phoned me, and said, “Judy, I love you.”  We made plans for a date that same night. Tragically, he was killed before we could keep our date.”

“All these years later, I hear music that I believe he is sending to me. Sometimes I am with other people, and I am the only one who can hear the music. Usually, “Judy, I Love you” is part of the music, although the tunes can be different, sometimes very fast and sometimes slow.”

“He has also sent these songs: “Pretty Woman”, “The Long and Winding Road”, “Love Me Tender” and “Hey There, Lonely Girl.” I haven’t heard some of those songs in a while.”

“But lately, in the morning when I am waking up, I have been hearing ” I Love You; I love you, Girl.” I hear a very distinctive male voice actually speaking these words until it all fades away. A chiming sound accompanies this.”

“For months now, each and every day, I have heard music of some kind, sometimes sounding like a chorus of male voices singing “Judy, I love you.” along with music. It can vary from peppy to a mournful tune.”

“I definitely hear this outside of my head. It sounds like someone is playing a recording. I have heard it here at home, at a medical appointment, miles away at a nursing facility, and sometimes it is quiet, but even then, I still hear it sometime during the day, everyday.”

“This has to be the most unusual happening of my entire life!”

“I should also mention that I talk to Don, both out loud and from my mind. I tell him that I love him and always will, and that someday we will be together. I really believe in an afterlife for sure now. It is definitely comforting.”

“I wanted to share this with anyone interested that may have had the same or similar experience.”

Commentary- Judy’s love story with Don began over 60 years ago. At first, it was marked by promise and love, then by sudden and unexpected tragedy. No doubt, the pain experienced by Judy was horrific. But, perhaps worst of all was the shattering devastation of the hopes and dreams of what might have been.

Since that tragic time in her life when all seemed lost, eventually, Judy continued to live her life without Don by her side. She has now experienced years of all the ins and outs of an ordinary life. Then, one day…quite the extraordinary thing happened. Don started singing love songs to her daily and making her smile. Judy is convinced that, had their life not been interrupted, she and Don, being the love of each other’s lives, would have been married to this day.

Spiritual Auditory Messages

There are many ways in which one could receive spiritual auditory messages.

  • Telepathy- Sometimes we receive messages through thought. We don’t always think of it this way, but prayer, is a form of telepathy, whether it is in sending or receiving thought content. You may have heard of a “mind reader” before? Sometimes it is amazing that we can know each other’s thoughts, especially when we don’t know someone well. And, sometimes we do know them well. It is common to share telepathy with our departed loved ones. However, it is also common to think that their thoughts are ours.
  • Channeling- This is a real interesting phenomenon. It feels quite like someone is continuously speaking a message for pen to add to paper. That’s my experience of it, at least. Some authors have even channeled books. Inventors have been given ideas. Clergy have been impressed with clarification or inspiration. This happens a lot in many different circles. It really occurs like an effortless flowing of words, information, possibilities and ideas.
  • Music as a Medium- We’ve all heard about Mediums before. Whether they are believed as a connection between the physical and spiritual world, that’s up to you or the medium. There are other mediums too. Art, stories, lyrics on the television program and dreams can be mediums, too. A medium is a message between… two worlds in this case. A spiritual expression and communication. One of the most obvious mediums can be heard in music. It could be a song that plays on the radio. A song you hear inside or outside your head. People have heard music, people singing or instruments as their loved one passes from this life. This happens sometimes during a Shared-Death Experience.

61 Years Later…

All these years later, Judy hears Don’s love songs that are given just to her. He orchestrates music of love to make her smile, amuse her, affirm to her that their love story has never ended. With the variance with which it happens, he does this in the most playful and exciting way.

Also, besides all the awesome music, comfort, peace and reassurance of his love, Don has given Judy the most important gift of all. He’s given her the gift of knowing with sureness of an afterlife. To know that we continue on with our spirit, love and intelligence is everything we could ever need to know to bring us comfort.

image: chienba

Most of the time, the songs our departed send to us have a particular message, emotion or meaning. One of Don’s songs, “The Long and Winding Road” gave Judy the message that, after all the life that has passed by in 60 years, with all its twists and turns, that road is leading them together again. He is telling her that he is waiting for her, and is excited for their next date together, and is doing so in the most patient and adorable way.

Recent Update-

Just recently, Judy wrote to tell me that she had a dream with Don that made her beam with joy! In this dream, both declared their love for one another, both hugging and kissing, and Don wanting to shout out to the world. Sounds like a date to me!

Also, this recent visitation in which he professed his love for Judy, serves to validate the truth of what Judy has been hearing all along. His songs of love for her are real.

However for now, until they are reunited again, Don will continue to send his songs and music from the afterlife.

The take away in this post is, that there positively is an afterlife, our departed loved ones reach out to us, and, after 61 years, Judy has heard from Don again and their relationship is still going strong! That is quite a love story!

Loneliness After Loss

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Among all the stages of grief, probably the hardest part is the loneliness. The vast missing of a beloved seems to extend forever in all directions for a time.

Art and Sally

Art and Sally were married for 54 years. When Art, suddenly passed away just over a year ago, It broke Sally’s heart. Since then, Sally has been grieving and missing her husband terribly.

Throughout their marriage, Art loved to take care of things for Sally, inside the house… and out. He was very handy, capable and could fix just about anything.

In the warmer months, you could see Art outside, wearing his sun hat, either on his tractor or physically working in the yard around the family house they built for themselves. In fact, he liked hats so much that when they would go on any adventure, he would buy a baseball hat as a souvenir.

One day when Art was still in the physical, he asked Sally, “What are you going to do with this big house when I’m gone?” Sally, thinking Art would surely outlast her, shrugged. She never would have imagined he would go before her. You see, the property is in a very secluded area without much traffic or many close neighbors. Art was wanting her to think about such a thing and be prepared in case it was necessary. Surely, It would be too much for Sally to take care of the whole house and property by herself, nor would she want to.

The Hat

Art's garden hat

Art’s garden hat

After Art’s passing, Sally has had some after-death communications from Art. Ironically, in one of them, he was still taking care of her by informing her of a possible plumbing problem. But the other week when Sally, so lonely and sad, was wanting yet another sign to give her confidence that he is still around, she went outside her house. On top of the flower bed, sat Art’s hat.

Although she can’t explain how the hat got there, Sally knew it was Art who left his it as a sign. No one else had been by the property since the gardeners were there, less than a week before. Enjoying the moment, she left it a day or so before the next time the gardeners would come. Then, she put it on her head and has worn it outside ever since.

Commentary- It’s clear that our loved ones perceive our thoughts and feelings. Although it doesn’t always happen, we do get these signs and after-death communications from time to time. And, it’s a real confidence booster and comfort when it does happen.

Art left his hat on the flower bed, as if to say, “I’m still here, I’m still in the yard and I’m still in the house with you. I have never really left.” It’s also a way for Art to give Sally flowers, and his hat being there, certainly got her attention. He also gave her his hat.

Putting on the hat is a way to merge on a spiritual level. It’s a way to acknowledge they are close to us. Having faith in our bond, we acknowledge and accept the possibility and truth of it.

Loneliness

loneliness

loneliness

When a loved one passes, it is difficult. There is a particular kind of loneliness that one experiences in what seems to be the setting in of some kind of finality. Sure. Things are not the same. We feel alone even though we may be surrounded, and even supported by people we love.

We see people out and about without as much as a care in the world. We notice the stark contrast in the human state of mind that many never notice until something like this happens to them. The lightness to the heaviness and just how deep the heaviness goes with grief. Never do we go any deeper than this.

We find ourselves in new and uncomfortable places in our psyche. We want to escape but we feel stuck. Sometimes it is just too much to take. The loneliness, that is.

Lean into it

Look. Having gone through this, I know it’s tough. I know it hurts. It may even seem unbearable at times. However, when I am asked about this, I always say to, “lean into it.” Yes. Lean into the loneliness and into the pain. Have the courage to do so. To experience a love this deep as to grieve this hard is a blessing and an honor. 

It is a blessing because you loved and were loved. Your relationship was deep and intricate. Your hearts, minds and souls merged together in a way that created this magnificent bond that is not so easy to get over. Good! It takes a lot of missing someone when they are no longer in the physical and sometimes, a whole lot of time. That’s called loneliness. Lean into it, it honors us, them and that sacred relationship.

They are right here

Our beloveds have not gone away. They are with us, love and care for us and reach out to help us where they can. At times, they leave their signs and after-death communications. Our relationships have not gone away. They’ve just gone deeper. We will be reunited with them again someday in the future in a way that satisfies us completely. Every day we live, paves the way for that. But remember, in the meantime, to live your life here, as well.

Shortly after this, another amazing thing happened. Previously, when Art asked her about what she would do with the house, she had no idea whatsoever. In what seemed like a miracle in her mind, she suddenly knew the right answer to that previous question, without any doubt at all.

With Art’s blessing, she will move into a new condominium in town where she will have a community there, no yard work, and will move forward and further into her healing path. And, of course, she knows that Art will follow her there, too.

Side note- Art’s souvenir baseball caps have all been adopted by family members who now spiritually merge with him and wear him close to themselves, as well. 
A poem Sally got from one of her grief groups

A poem Sally got from one of her grief groups

Knock Knock. He’s there!

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In this After-death Communication, Marie is visited by her beloved husband, with a series of knocks on her window, on two separate occasions.

Marie writes to me:
“In April of 2023, my dear husband of 45 years, passed away suddenly from a fall in our garage. I found him, and was so sad I wasn’t there to help. He wasn’t sick. He had a vibrant life. He loved flying and was training for an aerobatics competition, and still had a beautiful head of blonde hair!”

“The day he died, there was a large white egret (water bird) in our tree. We live in the desert.”

First occurrence,
“A few months later in June, I was sitting in the family room with our dog. I was still very sad. There were two gentle knocks on my window. I thought I was hearing things. Then, there were three knocks on my window. Puzzled, my dog heard those, he got up ran toward the window and stopped.”

“My husband was a kind and gentle person. I was wondering if that could have been him letting me know he was ok but didn’t want to scare me? The knocks were deliberate and spaced. There was no one I could see.”

My 1st response to Marie:

“Absolutely, Marie. Yes, I think you read those experiences perfectly. The message would be something to the effect of, “Hello, I’m still here but don’t want to make you afraid. I love and care about you and am watching over you.”
I’m sorry for your loss. Hugs. May you have many more of these. They are so healing.”

(Four months later in October) Maria writes me again: “The week of April 4, 2024 was one year since I lost my dear husband. However, after that experience of knocking on the sliding glass door in June 2023, I hadn’t heard anything or received any signs. I was disappointed.”

Then… Second occurrence
“A week or so after I wrote you in October of 2023 about this, I was in our bedroom folding laundry, and there were six rapid knocks on that glass door, then five right after. I opened the door, but there was nothing there. I thought if it was my husband again, it sounded urgent and did he want me to help him?”

“I was sad and frustrated because I didn’t know how to help. Interesting that happened on the other side of the house from the first experience, like he came to find me. I wish I knew if he was still near me or has moved on. I don’t know what to make of these experiences. Could my husband have come to me to tell me he was ok? Was he just letting me know he was still around.. and is he still here? And can I do anything to help him… frustrating. I miss him terribly.

My 2nd Response:
“Much of the time, our departed loved ones have, what I call, their own unique spiritual signature. It’s like a calling card that lets you know how they are showing up for you. Your husband knocks. He’s not knocking because he needs something. He knocks because he is trying to get your attention. He is telling you that he is still with you! He cares about you, and he loves you.”

“I know you miss him terribly but please know that although your eyes don’t see him, your ears sure hear him. He will always be with you, now, and when you are reunited. That’s what love does. And, in the meantime, he is always with you in your heart. No. He really is! 🙂 But that’s another conversation.”

Great White Egret Photo: Paul Brennan

Commentary- White egrets are large birds that symbolize purity, grace and new beginnings. It is no wonder that Marie’s husband would be represented in this great bird. Egrets are predator animals which sends the signal that he will be there to protect her and help her to get through adversity. Winged, no less, this could represent a pure heavenly angel, straight from God’s presence.

Many say that if you see an egret, you are very lucky. Maybe even blessed. They are considered a good omen.

I find it interesting that Marie’s husband knocks on glass, whether it be a window or sliding glass door. This points to, not only transparency, but to a portal into the next world, as well. The next world is so close to us. Perhaps he is telling her that he is so close to her, but there is just this thin and easily breakable barrier between them. Maybe even, metaphorically, so close that if he knocks too hard, the barrier will shatter. 

In my experience, windows represent entryways, openings or portals into the next world. It’s a common phenomenon. It’s definitely comforting to think about it that way, and like the “veil” that is often spoken of, implies that it is just that- a very thin membrane or fragile divide of sorts.

The softer knocking that happened at first, was to get Marie’s attention in a gentle way. A soft start can prepare us to be more consciously aware that a visit from our beloved is even possible. Paying attention and being willing to grow awareness often paves the way for visits more often.

Many times, through living in such a physical world, people have become spiritually tuned out against the finer and higher vibrations of the edges of our vibrational spectrum. We tend to focus mainly on getting through our day, let alone, getting through our life.

People tend to think that our experience of life exist within our 5 physical senses. It mainly does, but, being a spiritual being first, we can access more of these senses. Mainly, we have just forgotten how.

Dogs and cats are more spiritually attuned. Marie’s dog ran in the direction of the knock, then stopped. More than likely, he saw his master again. Perhaps he sees him quite a lot of the time. But this time was accompanied with some physical noise.

In April of 2024, Marie experienced her first year without her husband in the flesh. The experience of the loss of a beloved is devastating. However, he has always been with her. Always aware, always protective and always loving her. Marie has been able to tap into more than her physical senses. It feels good. It gives us hope and comfort.

Often, these reoccurring spiritual calling cards become the new way to communicate or send a message. The message usually serves as a reminder that our beloved “departed” is not so far away, but… actually very close to us, even to the point of being a part of us. But again… that’s a whole other conversation.

Photo credit: Bru-no (Pixabay)

 

You’ll Never Walk Alone

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As Linda’s perception shifts, so does her pain level. Scarcity thinking is so common in humans that we barely even notice. Notice though. It makes a difference.

Linda writes:
I have been very blessed to have received several after-death communications of various kinds from my beloved soulmate, Thellis, since he transitioned 2 years ago on this very day.

Three of these after-death communications have been documented on Jade’s website.
Visitations Through the Portal, The Power of Sheer Will and The Medicine that is Hope.

In The Medicine that is Hope, I experienced the appearance of a flock of mourning doves in the dead of winter on a snowy morning. It came at a point in which I was so profoundly despondent. I thought that I surely could not survive his being gone and had asked that he please give me a sign of his presence. I had specifically been asking to see a mourning dove, his favorite bird. I also knew this was ridiculous request to be making in middle of winter in Vermont.

But one cold snowy January morning, when feeling I could not go on much longer in this depressed state and consumed with grief, I was driving out of my neighborhood, and lo and behold, there was not one mourning dove, but a flock of them on side of road. I could not believe my eyes, but I knew he had sent them to me that day, knowing how much pain I was in, hopeless, and missing him so much.

Although many hard times in the grief process were ahead of me still, I felt that there was an internal shift within me that had somewhat given me hope that he had not left me behind – that he was, indeed still with me.

But, in April of this year, a year and 3 months after the doves, I sunk into another abysmal state of mind, crying spells, days once again filled with sadness and longing as strong as in early months following his death. It was a particularly sensitive time of year related to his passing. Easter was here – a time of renewal, rebirth, but also a time reminiscent of the beginning of the end of our time together on this earth.

Things felt unbearable again and I was so shocked to be in this horrible scary place again. I was having difficulty functioning, going to work, just barely getting through the day. I had a favorite picture of him, one taken when he was very young, before we ever met. This picture was one of my favorites. He had a beautiful smile and a way in which his eyes smiled, too. In this picture, there was just the very slightest hint of that — not the full smile so common with him.

This picture was on my dresser in my bedroom, along with other mementos related to him. One day, I looked over at this picture through my tears as I had looked at it everyday for past 2 years, and something seemed different about the picture. It was somehow slightly different and I kept looking, trying to figure it out.

Then, I realized that this picture looked different because not only was he “looking”  at me from this picture, but the smile was different; it was more pronounced. It was wider. I feared I was crazy, even hallucinating. I thought, perhaps it was just the lighting in the room, maybe the particular angle of the picture. So, I moved the picture around, sat it in a different location.

But, still, the look out of his eyes was warm and real. I was not just looking at a picture of him, but he was looking back at me. This could not be, I thought. Perhaps my grief is making me imagine or see things that are not really there.

However, since that day, 3 months later, it is still occurring on occasion. It is not every time I look at the picture, but it often still happens.  I now believe that he knew the pain I was in and he came to tell me and show me that he had not gone anywhere  —- that he was still with me and that things are ok, and that I am ok and will be ok.

Before this happened, I would sometimes just feel his presence once in awhile, whether there was a sign or not, and I would feel our strong connection. But much of the time, I would not feel his presence and feel that I had lost that connection to him. This is the loneliest feeling in the world.

But since that day in April, I have not felt that void, that feeling that he is “gone” or that I am ever alone. He used to tell me to remember the song, “You’ll never walk alone” and not to ever forget it.  Now, I know it’s true — he walks with me always until we meet again. Just as I recently read somewhere — “There is no goodbye – just a period of time until we say ‘hello’ again.”

Commentary- Often, we think our departed loved ones are somewhere “out there”, “over there” and, if you really think about it, it’s anywhere but here with us. This thought makes us sad.

It is the thinking that we are now, somehow, separated by death’s door. How final it seems. Any beliefs we might have of reuniting in an afterlife is of little comfort in these moments of grief. How horrific are these thoughts that cause us so much pain? How lonely to be separated in this fashion. Where is the compassion in it?

It would seem that only a cruel God would allow us to love someone so deeply, our companions who bravely walk with us through this already challenging world, only to have them ripped away from us. No, whatever intelligent force is out there, God, the Universe, Higher Self or whatever you may call it or not, it is not cruel. Perhaps there is something we are missing. 

What gives us an extraordinary amount of pain are our thoughts. At a time like death, our worst fears surface as we try to cope and navigate the new horrifying reality that is now our life. Sometimes death is expected, while other times death catches us off guard. That is the worst, with no time to prepare or say our goodbyes. These tragedies of loss are hard enough to fathom, however, when you really look at it, the kind of thinking that does the most damage is scarcity thinking. 

Thoughts of scarcity include,

  • “My loved one is gone now.” (No more)
  • “They’ve been taken away.” (Removed)
  • “They are out there, over there, somewhere else but here.” (Limited to a location)
  • “We are separated now.” (Not enough)
  • “I’m all alone now.” (No one left)
  • “I should/shouldn’t have done/said this or that (Fell short)
  • “My life is finished.” (It’s over now)
  • “They left me.” (Not worth staying for)

Beliefs of lack, limitation, inadequacy and/or all things finite are all tied to scarcity thinking. Of course, being that we live in the world of opposites and the death of a loved one is generally considered a “bad” thing, we are already in a dark place when we begin to think about how to process our thoughts and feelings. We feel like we’ve experienced a loss, a disconnect. This is human nature. Although it’s horrifying, we tend to go there first when it’s the most painful thing we could do.

Of course, there is something we can do in our grief process when we can. Somehow, if we can become conscious of this dark and limited way of thinking, at some point in our despair, we might just catch a glimpse of the possibility that we can shift our way of thinking into something more useful. If even a little at a time. It is possible to come out of the darkness a little more often and for longer periods of time. With the awareness of the impact that scarcity thinking has on our state of mind, perhaps we can recognize it as unhelpful to our healing and well-being in every way.

You see how Linda, with some after-death communications, became more and more aware of this lighter consciousness. She also became more grateful, which is a response to recognizing the abundance in her life. She mentions an internal shift. This was an actual shift in her thinking. And, as she did shift, she felt more and more connected to her Beloved. Now, he even looks and smiles at her from his picture from time to time. This is a thing, by the way, it’s more on the rarer side but it does happen.

So no. It’s not God, the Universe, Higher Self or whatever else you want to call it or not, being cruel. In fact, most, if not all of our pain comes from our own thinking that involves scarcity, whether it’s lack, limitation, inadequacy and/or all things finite. The compassion I asked about? That needs to come from us, toward our smallest, most unaware self that suffers without end.

Maybe our departed loved ones are not “out or over there” at all. Maybe they are “in and over here.” Some say, “The Kingdom of Heaven is within.” Maybe we never actually thought that was real? Literal or metaphorical… What if it is?

In the end, what has been missing is the thinking that no matter what happens with those we love, we are always connected. We are connected in life and in death… because it is all the same infinite and abundant life. We just have to have these thoughts more often as it truly creates a shift in consciousness and an evolution in thinking that could bring us greater peace, healing and comfort. And, we need to be compassionate with ourselves.

In the song of hope that Linda mentioned earlier in this post, we are reminded once again, that despite our best stab at the scarcity of dark and depressing thoughts as a knee-jerk reaction to death, loss and pain, “We’ll never walk alone.” Maybe that means never.

May the light of consciousness shine the way for you always. May you experience abundance and take compassion on yourself.

Light of Consciousness Photo credit- Geralt

Light of Consciousness Photo credit- Geralt

Adjusting to a Spiritual Relationship

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Sometime after Kenneth’s husband, Jon, passes away, Kenneth realizes they can still hang out at times.

Kenneth writes:
“My husband, Jon, passed away in June of 2016. I had a very hard with handling him not being here in the physical.”

“It’s been over five years now. I had to realize that just because he was gone, it didn’t mean we couldn’t see each other. To this day, he often communicates with me in my dreams. That is our new way of being with each other. When he is in my dreams we are all over the place- places I don’t know and people I don’t know.”

Angel

Angel: Pixabay-The Digital Artist

“One dream, I was looking into another room from where I was. As I walked closer toward that room, I could feel an arm as I walked into the room, it was Jon. I paused just looking at him. There was a mysterious but familiar lady with him to the side. She has been around me since I was a child. She also appeared to me on the day that Jon died.”

“When I saw him again, I asked him if I could hug him, to which Jon said, “Yes.” Our hug felt like he was with me in the physical. It felt so real and so good. Then, he was gone.”

“After I wake up from these events, I thank him for hanging out with me and hope that we can hang out again soon. I don’t always remember the messages he tells me, and sometimes it could be months later when I understand what he was telling me. For example, right before Covid-19 broke out, Jon told me that life was going to get really bad for awhile until it would get better. At the time, I didn’t understand. Now, I do.”

Commentary- Adjusting to the new non-physical relationship of a departed loved one can be challenging. For some, even to be able to make that leap in their own thinking, that a continuing relationship might even be possible, could prove difficult and stop them in their tracks. For others, “if there’s a will, there’s a way.” Some of them go forth to find it.

The Fragility of Life

Our whole experience in this world is mostly focused on the physicality of people, places and things in this realm. After one’s passing, although, the places and things still remain, it comes as quite a shock when those same people who were so real to us, disappear from our physical realm. Some might say, “I was just with them and now they are gone. I just don’t believe it.” The fragility of one’s life is difficult for our brains to reconcile, hence the denial phase of the grief process.

The experience of our physical lives seems very permanent until a beloved is snatched up by the unseen that we call death. It is only then, that we realize with such impact that impermanence was there all along. The strong image of a life in this world and the people in it turned out to be so precarious all along, and we didn’t even realize it. We didn’t plan for it to happen as soon as it always does. We had no say, and it hurts to think something so precious could ever be taken away with such ease and disregard.

Our Earthly Perception

Many people live with unquestioned beliefs that include the thinking that, “people only die when they are old and gray.” “The young have the rest of their lives to live.” Or, there is such a thing as a “fairytale ending” in this life and that we “live happily ever after” in it. For sure, death would not dare to interrupt our bliss. Right? Unfortunately, as many of us now know firsthand, there are no set rules about how long we are able to stay in this world. Sometimes it seems like there is no rhyme or reason to one’s timely death either.

Is it a possibility to continue a relationship with a departed loved one?

When we experience the passing of our loved one, we may become resigned and cynical that our beloved relationship could ever continue outside a physical context. After all, isn’t it impossible? Although our brains may say it’s impossible, our hearts want what they want and some have found a way to bridge the two worlds together.

 If so, how do you do it?

Reaching between worlds

Reaching between worlds Pixabay:Geralt

Kenneth has discovered his dreams as a vehicle for being together again with his beloved, Jon. In dreams, Kenneth is reassured that Jon is accessible and still loves him. Kenneth has opportunities to communicate, touch and be with Jon in this way. This experience informs Kenneth that their love is still alive as their relationship continues on, even until this day.

Other Mediums

Others have learned to be together at times through the medium of meditation, hypnosis, prayer and out of body experiences. Some use toning, music, walks in nature, talking to them and listening as well as sheer faith and trust that a connection will happen. This will lead to a sure knowledge that they are always accessible to you, and, of course, any relaxation serves as a wonderful space of nothingness to clear the path for connection. Nothingness is an amazing state in which to discover something-ness…something that’s magnificent.

The Beauty of Simplicity

There are many simple ways to connect. Our problem is mainly that we make it too hard and in our brains, we have decided it to be impossible. Is it? It’s not. We overthink things instead of allowing them to happen. Having some faith and trust in the power of love is simple and goes a long way.

I can think of no big dance you have to do, no chant, nothing loud or complicated. There is nothing to learn if you don’t want to. It’s simple. Let it be simple. Practice grace.

Understanding Balance in the Physical/Spiritual Adjustment

Don’t get me wrong. I’m not suggesting that you zone out of this life and the people in it, in order to chase the one in the next life. That would be irresponsible and unhealthy. Although that may be what you want in your grief, that serves no one, but you may still try to do it. That can be part of your grief process, too. 

An important part of healing grief is to eventually be able to accept your loved one’s passing in a healthy way. It is also important to realize that just because you no longer see your departed loved one in the way you once did, it doesn’t mean they are no longer with you. These two things can go hand in hand.

After Christian died, in my grief, I remember being told so clearly, “Your relationship has not gone away. It’s just gone deeper.” I knew from that message that this was actually a promising message as “deeper” seemed much more comforting than “gone.”

I realized that I would have to make some adjustments in my thinking of what is possible. It was now our new spiritual relationship. I realized I would have to exercise my faith in the unseen until I could see this possibility clearly for my seIf. 

I saw this as an opportunity to develop my spirituality more substantially, more completely to better access his world and he, mine. At first, I did it with faith as my guide. And now, knowing has overtaken that faith. There is nothing that could ever convince me that my own experiences with him after his death, were/are not real. They are more real to me than ever now. 

The Takeaway

  • It is possible to adjust to the non-physical relationship of a departed loved one. Of course, your relationship won’t be exactly the same as it was in the physical, we need to be reasonable. Our relationships will still be there in a spiritual sense… which are just a more stealthy version of connection.
  • Like with Kenneth’s gradual realization that a continued spiritual relationship with Jon was possible, open your mind to the miracle that this could be so. Just because it comes time for one to pass on, it doesn’t mean the relationship is gone or that love dies in the process. In Kenneth’s adjusted thinking about life and death and all that it means about his relationship and connection with Jon, he has found a way for them to be together at times.  I’d say that’s pretty special.
  • Let the spiritual connection with your departed loved one be simple, in other words, likely to happen. All of this happening takes place in the territory of what and how you think of it. You don’t need to overthink it, make it hard or even do anything at all. Allow it to come in its own time with ease.
  • Have faith. You may not realize the continued connection at first, but once you do, faith will no longer be a requirement as you will know for yourself that it is possible, in whatever way that it is.
  • Most importantly, trust in your loved one and in the love you shared and still continue to share. Without giving up and becoming resigned and cynical to the sad thinking of “that’s it, now our relationship is gone.” Instead, realize one of life’s greatest possibilities that your relationship has just gone deeper. Trust that sooner or later, love will find a way. It will. It’s never too late to realize what Kenneth did.

For more posts about Kenneth’s experiences with Jon, please read, A Place of Nothingness and Thought Perception

Love will find a way Pixabay:jplenio

Love will find a way Pixabay:jplenio

After-Death Communication Message Types

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While there are many different types of after-death communications, in a dream, Rose receives the one of practical guidance.

Rose writes:
“I’ve had so many beautiful and amazing visits from my Mother, and lately from my Dad which made me so happy. A little while ago, here in the Hudson River Valley, we had severe thunderstorms with large amounts of rain. One night, my father interrupted a dream I was having. It was so shocking, knowing that he just popped in unexpectedly.

My Dad said, “All is well, however, please watch the rainfall nearby and remember the generator I gave you.” I woke up the next morning, remembering what he said. My day went on and by early evening, the storms came through again, thunder, lightning, severe winds and flooding.

At around 9:30 pm, my neighbor, Dustin, called me to ask how we were doing with all this rain. He is a volunteer fireman. After checking outside and taking one look at our basement, I called him right back because the entire property was a lake! The basement steps were covered in water swirling around to the top of the basement door.

Dustin called the fire department and Central Hudson Company turned off the power to our house. That night was a very long, hot and sweaty night with no power and basement under six feet of water.

The next morning, the water subsided as the catch basins nearby, finally caught up and were doing their job. David, my partner, and I were tired, hot and stressed out. That was the moment when I suddenly remembered the dream and that my father reminded me about the generator. David has one and we never touched my father’s. When I told David the dream I had, we went to the garage. David’s generator which was newer, would not start at all. I told him to please try my dad’s, I knew it would work because he told me it would.

David pulled the generator out of the garage and dusted it off. It started with one pull! We had power again. I sat in the garage and said a prayer to God and to Jesus, thanking them for letting my father come to me to help. I am always so thankful to God and Jesus daily for the blessings of the day.

Commentary- If you know anything about after-death communications, you know the messages that are sent to us by our departed fall into many different categories. Here are some of them that are most common.

Checking in.

This message conveys something to the effect of,

  • “Hey, I made it.”
  • “Please don’t worry about me, I’m good.”
  • “It’s beautiful here.”
  • “I’m in a good place.”
  • “I’m reunited with loved ones.”
  • “I just wanted to let you know.”

Reassurance. (“I got you.”)

  • “I’m aware of you.”
  • “I’m still with you.”
  • “I love and care about you.”
  • “Everything will turn out well in the end.”
  • “Don’t worry. This is temporary.”
  • “We will be reunited again someday.”
  • “You can get through this.”
  • “I approve. You have my blessing.”
  • “We are one.”

Informational. Insight. Enlightening. (On a need to know basis)

  • “This is what happened.”
  • “This is what will happen.”
  • “This is why.”
  • “This is how it works.”
  • “Here’s some information about you, your life, life in general, and the afterlife.

Giving Thanks.

After-death communications that say,

  • “Thanks for everything.”
  • “I appreciate you so much.”
  • “I see you.”

Subtle Promptings. (Guidance, Advice and Practical reminders)

  • “Remember ‘something’ now. It will be helpful to you later.”
  • The mention of a particular person and that, “So and so might be able to assist you with that dilemma.”
  • A very familiar and meaningful song plays on the radio. “This is a reminder that I love and care about you. We are still one.”
  • “Remember who you are.”
  • “I’m here guiding you.”

Protect with Urgent Directives. (Warning, Caution that screams, “Do or don’t do this.”)

  • “Don’t drive that same way you normally do or even in that direction.”
  • “Stay clear of that person.”
  • “Get out of the house, car, whatever, NOW.”
  • “Get out of the way!”
  • “That’s a bad situation. Don’t get involved.”
  • “Go a different way.”
  • “Do something different with your life.”

Touching base. (Can occur as a unexpected visit because time has passed with less frequent visits)

  • “Yep. I’m still here.”
  • “Yep. I’m still very aware of your situation.”
  • “Here’s an idea for you.”
  • “Yep, I’m still doing great.”
  • “See all the healing you’ve accomplished? You are doing so much better now. I never wanted you to suffer.”
  • “Yep. I still love and care about you. We are one.”

Conclusion

When Rose’s dad came to her in her dream with his message about the generator, it was just what she needed to hear. Without it, her father’s generator would have collected even more dust when it could have been put to good use. 

Since our departed loved ones have a much different perspective than we do, they don’t get all worked up about the small stuff. Rose’s dad knew that, although the rains were coming, Rose and David would be just fine, just hot, uncomfortable and without power. That’s where the generator was such a great idea. Rose’s dad was prompting her in a dream, guiding her, assisting her to remember what he would have done. He would have pulled out that old dusty generator and fired it right up.

Our Angels

We often imagine that our departed loved ones are off, somewhere, clear over there, separate from ourselves and that they have no idea what is going on in our lives. Rose’s father shows how untrue this actually is. Think about this. Rose’s dad knew a rain storm was coming. Just wow! He wanted his daughter to have everything she could need for it. The old, dusty generator started with one pull of the cord. I’d say that’s pretty miraculous. I’d say he was very aware.

Our departed loved ones do watch over us. They love and care for us from beyond. They are familiar with our struggles and our accomplishments. They do their very best to guide us through the situations in our lives. They are our angels, and… we will be angels to the ones we leave behind, as well. We will guide and protect them, too. Because that’s what love does.

Angels watching over us

Angel: Photo credit: cocopariseenne

The Beauty of a Spiritual Practice

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One morning while Jennifer meditates, she is privy to an extraordinary event- her brother’s release from this world and his transition to the next

Jennifer writes:
“On the morning March 31st, I had returned to my bed to meditate quietly as my husband had not yet awakened. I was in a quiet place with my thoughts subsiding and a beautiful indigo blue vision appeared in front of me. Awake but with closed eyes I was overwhelmed with deep calm peacefulness, joy and bliss.”

“The vision was like a balloon inflating and deflating …very deep dark edges and lighter fading into a centre of almost white. It was a light dimming and glowing before me. I felt if I reached my hand out I would feel it but did not want it to go away so I enjoyed the bliss while it lasted, which felt like 2-4 minutes.”

“I got up feeling incredible. I was still in a pure state of joy, I sat with my iPad researching such things as archangel Michael, the throat chakra, blue visions and I was convinced from the feelings of comfort and peace I had felt a blessing of sorts.”

“I sat talking to my husband of the wonderful peacefulness that I felt. As we were talking, my MSN chimed and on my brother’s message his wife asked if I could call her. I rang her. She said my brother had gone. Confused, I asked, “Where has he gone?” Tearfully, she explained that she had found him. He had died by suicide that morning.”

“Of course, grief struck me immediately but after some tears had subsided I came to the realization that my vision had occurred during my brother’s transition. I naturally felt he had peace and comfort after the turmoil that had been facing him here in this world. I felt an enormous comfort from this.”

“The deep blue seemed so significant to me that I put a blue bottle out on a ledge near my kitchen window. That evening I was listening to music, reflecting on our lives and remembering my brother with his big beautiful smile. My house was all closed up bar one door to the entry courtyard area. I had a dim lamp so the room was quite dark.”

“Outside, it was night and there wasn’t much moonlight so it was very dark. Just then, a bird flew into the room. It landed on the blue bottle I had out for my brother. I was thrilled, overjoyed, in fact, then it found it’s way back out through the courtyard. My husband saw it leave. I was sad it had gone but not even two minutes later, this bird returned and sat looking at me. I felt so calm after a couple of minutes, I picked it up, opened my kitchen window and set it free. This bird did not fly away but perched itself just beyond the window on a chain that hung to the window sill.”

“As I closed the window, it flew away. There was so much peace in my heart, I felt my brother near me again. We used to rehabilitate birds. It was our thing.”

“I went to bed in comfort, knowing he was in a good place. Over the next few days I received many signs. One morning I was lucid dreaming and could hear my phone buzzing but in my dream, I looked at the screen and there were constellations, black and white, of course, as that’s how the sky looks at night. When I woke up I had 3 messages on my phone. My daughter-in-law had sent pictures of my brother at her wedding to my son. The pictures were in black and white which is quite unusual these days and the wedding was last year. Most of the pictures taken were in color.”

“On a site I always look up for my morning quote, it read, “I took the road less travelled” by Robert Frost. This made perfect sense to me. A little while later, I was listening to a talk by a fellow I listen to who had the same Christian name as my brother, Neville, and of all the random talks I happened to pick, within the first few minutes of a 40 minute talk, he spoke of Robert Frost. Everything was connecting!

Neville’s birth year

Then, of all things, my husband got dressed and on his shirt was a Roman numeral, MCMLX5. This was the year my brother was born.”

 

 

“Everything, all these signs and synchronicities have given me courage, strength, faith and reassurance. Lots of evidence that God is always in/with us, eternally. Things keep happening and I am so comforted. Blessings to everyone and love to all.”

“I live In Australia. I looked to see which bird breed it was. It was a Graceful Honeyeater.”

Commentary- When Jennifer heard the tragic news about her dear brother, Neville, she already had a deeply spiritual foundation in place through her practice of meditation. Without it, she may have missed this amazing experience as well as the spiritual understanding of what it all meant. Grieving would have been much more painful and difficult without her spiritually grounded foundation.

What Jennifer experienced is also called a “Shared Death Experience” where, like her brother, Neville, she was privy to the actual moment of his release from this world and his transition to the next. The beautiful thing about this is that Jennifer was a witness to Neville’s sudden peacefulness. She can be comforted that he safely made it back home to all that is love and understanding.

chakras

chakras Kirtlane/Pixabay

The Indigo color that Jennifer experienced is the color of the spiritual third eye chakra. This is the seat of intuition and spiritual sight/vision according to yoga traditions. It is characterized by a deep blue with deep purple mixed in, so the color is very rich. The third eye chakra is just below the crown chakra which is a vibrant violet. This Chakra is considered to be the highest chakra and access to the Divine and Universal consciousness.

So, it makes sense why Jennifer was easily able to witness this, as she was already in sync with its vibrational frequency. It would appear that Neville was reaching out from a spiritual context and in her peaceful meditation she was there at the perfect moment and state of mind to receive his communication to her, as well as his communion with God.

The spiritual signs and synchronicities that Jennifer received are very obvious. Recognizing that the blue she saw was significant, she left a blue bottle on the ledge. This indicated that she got Neville’s spiritual communication on a spiritual level. When he flew in her home as a bird to land on the blue bottle, he verified that this profound experience was real. This was no coincidence. But please tell me. How many birds do you see flying at night, no less inside your home to land on the very thing you put out for them to land on?

But, just ignoring that, how often will a bird in the wild allow you to pick it up to hold for a bit before sending it on its way? And then it flies in once more? What are the odds? There is no doubt that this was Neville celebrating his flight of release with his sister who, having worked with wounded animals, would understand this so well.

Lastly, it would seem that Neville had chosen to be a bird for a bit. Perhaps this was because he and his sister spent time rehabilitating birds when they were younger. This would allow Jennifer, if she had any doubt whatsoever, to know for certain Neville was communicating that he is good, happy and free from the wounds that plagued him in his life. And, although he dearly loved those he left behind, he felt his wounds were far too great to be mended and had to fly to the world beyond. His sign to Jennifer said it all. This bird had now been rehabilitated.

Even though, to our physical senses, we may think of our departed loved ones as gone, from a higher perspective, they are always here with us, guiding and loving us from beyond. This is why a deep spiritual foundation is so helpful. With it, we are more sensitive to our spiritual side and journey. We are more calm and peaceful in general.

But, when a tragedy strikes, we have a greater understanding, and even knowledge that this life is just a pit stop in the whole scheme of things. That maybe, there is a larger chain of events to look at- a much larger perspective that we don’t always understand in the moment. Until we do. And often, it is trust and faith that does the heavy lifting. But like the physical eyes from which we see, trust and faith become our spiritual eyes when all seems so dim. 

Path: Ben Kerckx/Pixabay

Path: Ben Kerckx/Pixabay

What I know is that our departed loved ones are still with and very much aware of us. That’s what love would do. And often, in their pure spiritual form it is far easier for them to help us with our worldly needs, as well as the spiritual things that really matter in the end, as we travel the path that we are meant to take. All paths lead to our spiritual blossoming and evolution as we grow ever closer to the source of our existence.

May you always have comfort, peace and joy on that journey.

A Poem written by Jennifer to her beloved brother, Neville.

My brother was small in stature but his heart was as big as the sky,
We so wanted him to stay here.. but ours is not to question Why?
Our hearts felt so torn that day ..we didn’t get to say goodbye
As he freed himself from this world and finally, found a way to fly.

We still feel his gentle spirit …. yet his soul has found embrace.
May he always be at peace as he moves on to a brighter place.
We may not understand, as our tears are overflowing …
Yet none of us could realize just how much his pain was growing.

When we were young together, we found beauty in simple things
,
Rescuing birds, insects, tiny bats, trying to repair their broken wings.
Sometimes we would see that their journey here had ended,
 and that, Not everything you SEE or HOLD can easily be mended.
As we laid those fragile creatures down, we hugged each other tight,
 and although their lives were cut short, we knew everything was alright.

I imagine that there is a Heaven, maybe you mend the Angel’s wings?
I can see you there, you’ve grown your hair,
there is beauty in such things.
……

Shortly after you departed …a bird flew into my room ,
It sat with me for a moment, it seemed to take away my gloom ..
It flew outside again so I thought that it had gone ,
but it returned a moment later which gave me strength to carry on .

I understood at that moment that even though you’d left our lives,
you’ll remain in our hearts forever ….it helped me to realize ..
The people who we love ……they really Never go away.
They just slip inside our hearts and help us ,each and every day.

When I think of you …THE OCEAN ,THE SKY ,they always come to mind,
The peace they gave …as you were engulfed in BLUE
Was where you could leave your worries behind.
In my dreams I watch you sail away …..and I see you soaring free,
throughout the skies and up to the stars as you leave that wondrous sea.

Now at this moment as we are those …that are all engulfed in blue,
we can picture your kite sailing freely, Soaring ….as you were meant to do.
So, as the pain arises and tears flow SALTY from our eyes,
We can smile and remember you flying freely… with your heart as big as the SKY.

Forever in our hearts, Jenni

Hugging a Departed Loved One

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After Jan repeatedly asked her departed mother for a hug, her heart’s desire is realized. Twice!

The Twilight Bridge

The Twilight Bridge

Jan writes:
“I had a couple of “dreams” again of my mom, but I am not sure if it was a regular dream or a “twilight bridge” dream. What I wrote to you before in “The Twilight Bridge” post were definitely not dreams. That much was obvious.”

“Now, I will try and explain my question to you. I had said out loud for many weeks that I wanted to hug mom. Then, I had two different dreams. Both were in the same setting, it seemed outside somewhere, not here in the house. It was like I drifted into an outdoor area where my mom was socializing with some people. She noticed me, smiled and greeted me with these people around her. It seemed like she was by a car. In trying to make sense of it all, I thought we were going on one of our short trips for the weekend or maybe we were there already.”

“Although there were a few other people with her, I could not see faces as they were more like shadows. My mom seemed much brighter, easy to see I mean, and very close.  I was right there with her and she seemed happy, smiling, enjoying chatting with people. Relatives? I do not know but that was really all there was to it.  Then, I must have woken up.”

“The next time I had this dream, it was the exact same place…. same people and situation, except my mom’s light around her seemed brighter and she was in color while everything else was a darker colorless shade. My mom was very clear. She had her pink fuzzy bathrobe on- she definitely stood out among the other shadows of people there. I went to her and hugged her. She never said anything to me but she was smiling and seemed happy. Then, I must have woken up.”

“When I woke that morning, I remembered it clearly and the feeling of hugging and being freshly hugged still lingered. I mean, could have been my imagination or not, but somehow, I felt like I had hugged her close. I had felt her, I had hugged her for real.”

“Anyway, this may not be anything… maybe just a wishful dream as it was outside the house in a different setting. So I have been thinking it was just a dream. It did not last long. Nothing happened really except I met my mom for a short time and felt her presence plus she was smiling (which I am glad of)”.

“So, I guess sometimes it may be hard to distinguish a dream from something else?”

Commentary- Because of the spiritual visitation experience spectrum that spans anywhere from ‘nuanced” to ‘blow your socks off’ obvious, it can be hard to distinguish a dream from a visitation, although this was clearly a visitation… except it was Jan that was doing the visiting.

Space, Place or State of Mind?

While “The Twilight Bridge” is considered a neutral meeting “place” or “space” between this realm and the next realm, where we sometimes go to meet our loved ones, “The Twilight Bridge” is also experienced as a state of mind or place of spirit and not necessarily an actual place. But having said this, it could also be experienced as an actual place. What was different about this experience from Jan’s experience at “The Twilight Bridge” is that Jan didn’t meet her mother at the bridge, she went over the bridge to where her mom was in another realm.

Entering another realm Pixabay: Jplenio

Entering another realm Pixabay: Jplenio

What makes this so?

The fact that Jan felt herself drifting (a thing of the spirit) into another space, an outdoor space, which represents somewhere other than where Jan’s life normally play out. The outdoor setting Jan describes is a metaphor for… another location besides here at my house… or where I live in this Earthly realm.

Jan’s mom was seen thriving in her new community of people, smiling, happy and certainly aware because she saw Jan, as if she was waiting for her to visit. She was. The car represents travel, reminding Jan of their prior weekend trips, as well as, pointing to, that this is a possibility of a new way to spend time together for short trips now.

Jan notices how much clearer and even brighter in the second visitation that her mother appeared compared to those around her. The explanation here is that the other people around her were not considered the focal point, her mother was being that Jan asked to see and hug her mom again. The other people in the experience, sort of seen/not seen are clearly not the most important take away, although it does point to her newfound acclimation, happiness and a community that she enjoys in her current realm.

Having the same dream twice is sort of like saying to Jan, “If you don’t believe I heard you about seeing me to get a hug, I did. To prove it, here is the second dream with even more certainty, clarity and brighter colors!  I’m at home here. I’m even wearing my bright pink bathrobe. You will recognize me immediately, can’t miss me!” In other words, she heard Jan loud and clear.

Why we doubt, dismiss and discount spiritual visitations

It’s really common to dismiss a spiritual visitation as an ordinary dream since it doesn’t always make perfect sense. Sometimes it is abstract or unclear. Often, we are afraid to believe our experience because… what if it were just our imagination and not really so?

We don’t want to be the fool. We don’t want to get our hopes up only to be let down again, which would only add to our hurt of seeming to live a life alone without them now.

However, why doubt, dismiss and discount first when having these experiences, then, have to be convinced of their validity? Given that we can react the way we want (sometimes), why not look and listen to your experience of what it is trying to tell you? Why not look and listen for the possibility of spiritual visitations/after-death communications, signs and messages from beyond?

These spiritual communications are so precious but they are fragile and fleeting. We must believe these special gifts from heaven are completely possible and probable and to see it as such. We must gather these seeds of faith and nurture them and perhaps they will grow into profoundly meaningful experiences that will tide us over throughout our lives.

So what if we don’t understand everything or it’s abstract and unclear? So what if we make a fool of ourselves but we see special spiritual things that physical eyes can’t or won’t see? And, so what if we get our hopes up? Take the hopeful message from the visitation and use it for comfort.

The Takeaway

There is a lot that happened in Jan’s experience with her mother. There is a lot of information to glean from it for Jan to hold as precious in her heart, mind and soul. But perhaps, most importantly… Jan’s heartfelt desire to hug her mom again was heard and realized. A hug that lingers is a real hug that follows us back over the bridge to this plane of existence. Jan got to hug her mom again!  Yes, it was a real hug, Jan!

Love survives and thrives beyond the grave. Your mother still lives, and loves you… and when the time is right, you will reunite together in a way that brings you both the greatest joy, leaving all sadness behind.

For more after-death communications click here.

Another realm- Pixabay: Thomas Skirde

Another realm- Pixabay: Thomas Skirde

Visitations Through the Portal

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One night last Christmas time, while making her rounds in the hospital, Linda notices something very interesting in the hospital safety mirror. 

Linda writes:
“This past December of 2020, marked 3 months since the transitioning from this earthly realm of the only man I ever truly deeply loved since I was 25 years old. Due to circumstances in each of our lives we could not be together, but we share a beautiful daughter, and love between us never ended and never will.”

“I was really struggling and in so much sorrow and pain. And although I was so very blessed as to receive some very special signs/communication from him, I just could not seem to find at times, my way out of that deep dark place of loss.”

Safety Mirror at hospital

Safety Mirror at hospital

“I am a nurse on an inpatient mental health unit and I work night shift, which entails making 15 minute checks on each patient all through the night for safety. There are 2 curved mirrors in the hallway which are there to increase range of view in hallway, also for safety’s sake. I have worked here for 7 years, so you can imagine how many times I have passed those mirrors, seeing the usual reflection of the surroundings and myself as I pass by.”

 

“However, this past December, during the week after Christmas, when I passed by there, something was so different that it caught my attention. I saw what looked like a dull whitish/grayish blurred image of a figure dancing around. The lights are dimmed at night in hallways to promote better sleep for the patients. So mirror images are darker at night. But there was definite movement that evening. Then, as I kept passing it during the night, and subsequent nights, there was also an image of twinkling lights in a shape of a Christmas tree.”

Alcove

Alcove

“I was sure my grief had now literally driven me crazy and I was hallucinating. Over the next few weeks, the images continued of a figure dancing around and more lights – sometimes, beams or little balls of light, sometimes glitter and sparkles and couple of times in shape of a little lasso. In the mirror, they appear behind, around and with me in the dark alcove. They were occasionally shooting out of the reflected image in mirror into the hallway floor and wall. ”

“I did not tell anyone at first, then decided, of course, I must tell Jade. She reassured me that it was not insanity. I did not see this anywhere else. I did not at first associate this with my Beloved because it seemed too fanciful and he was not a sparkle and glitter type of guy who would be dancing around shooting balls of light!  But, more recently, when I began to go through a particularly rough patch of longing and despondency at Easter (which held significance for us), there was an additional feature.”

“When these images appeared reflected in the mirror, sometimes a lot, sometimes a little, in my peripheral vision, there began to be a dark shadow appear, almost like a cloud shape, close beside my face. It was not at all scary, in fact, it felt warm like a little hug.”

“Then, I knew, it was him creating the wondrous light show for my benefit – something to cheer me up, lighten my grief, literally with lights and something fun and frivolous filled with glitter and sparkles that I love so much. And just to be scientific, there is no other source of light in that hallway – no other lighting fixtures or no windows or any other source of light that could be casting reflections of light from any other outside source.”

“Some might say, “Perhaps you have an eye disease/disorder”, but even though such a thing is possible to some extent, it would not be happening only in this setting and it’s not consistent.”

“Before his passing, we would talk each night just before I walked into the hospital and this was one of the most special times when we would talk. I longed for this constantly and although I still long for and miss his voice and those conversations, I know I will most likely be visited by him in this new and special way, and the bond, the love, the support, the relationship goes on forever.”

Commentary- When Linda finally had courage enough to mention to me this unusual, repeated experience that she was having, I recognized the phenomenon right away. I read about it years ago and, being curious, I thought about trying it for myself several times to see what would happen but never did.

Although Linda might have thought, because she was “seeing things” that she was either going crazy, sleep deprived, bereaved or was having an eye issue, the truth is Linda was actually seeing things in and around the mirror. She just happened upon it by accident that night that she noticed.

Throughout history, people of all races and belief systems have used mirrors, glass, steam, smoke, shiny things and still water surfaces as a method in which to catch a glimpse of their loved ones in the afterlife. Like Linda, sometimes it was an accidental discovery and sometimes it was a planned method to get a much needed relief. It just depended on the people and what was known and practiced.

Anyone who has lost a loved one knows that deep-rooted gnawing desire to experience a departed loved one once again. The loss and longing are intense. This desire is at the heart of our love. Many times this desire compels us to attempt to connect in whatever way seems possible whether it be through a Medium or some other way.

Although it might seem unbelievable to some, throughout time, others have gone ahead with what seemed impossible, to try to satisfy this desire.

Some history of this phenomenon 

  • As I was researching this subject, I came upon a 2019 Dissertation, Mirrors as Portals: Image of Mirrors on Ancient Maya Ceramics by Julie Rogers. In her research, she mentions that the Maya believed in mirrors, water surfaces and shiny stones as a way to connect to other spiritual realms. This is even reflected heavily in their Hieroglyphics and ceramics found today. To them, these surfaces were considered to be a window for Spiritual beings to look in on humans. I guess it’s like T.V. for the Gods to watch us.
  • The Greek’s Necromanteum or Oracles of the Dead, was a well known place full of ritual and preparation performed to be able to go deep within this Greek Temple to connect with departed loved ones. Many found it helpful and healing, even thought others claimed it to be a gimmick.
  • Dr. Raymond Moody is a famous Medical Doctor and recorder of thousands of near-death experiences, even coining that term, and an Author and Speaker. At one point in his life, Dr. Moody became so fascinated in the ancient Greek tradition of reuniting with the dead, he studied the ancient version of the Necromanteum and came up with his own version for the bereaved to experience at his country home. With a comfortable chair, mirror placed just right, dim lighting and an all day ritual of focusing on their departed loved one, many people were able to go into this modern day Psychomenteum to experience a connection with their loved one. What made this really powerful was that, as a subject participating in this method, the result many people would experience by receiving this manifestation, was profound healing effects. No one was afraid when they entered in and waited for their departed loved ones. The experience seemed very real, comforting and natural to these folks.
  • Among the many peoples of the Earth for which this was a tradition, some Native American groups I read about had their own methods of breaching the portal from this world into the next. For many peoples, these shiny surfaces, especially that of a mirror was a way to travel into other realms.
  • Some belief systems use mirrors as symbolism of eternity or a life that has no beginning or no ending and that it’s all just one big eternal life.

Other common examples that these reflective surfaces have been viewed as portals into another realm

  • I’m sure many have heard the story of Abraham Lincoln, just after election, while looking in the mirror saw two reflections of himself: one looked normal, the other ghostly. While he tried to show his wife this spectacle, which appeared a few other times, she was never around when it happened. This story points to a mirror vision. One that tried to warn him about his impending death.
  • When someone sends me an image of an indoor orb, I notice that sometimes that orb can be seen as though it entered through an open window or door. Sometimes even a mirror is around. Not every time, but it has given me pause to wonder.
  • When people leave us to cross over, often, through near-death experiences, we hear that a portal will appear to open up for them to pass through, allowing them access into this different and new realm. Similar to a wormhole this could be like an actual method of transportation to jump dimensions and realms.
  • Seers can also be seen as looking through the mirror for you, if you can’t… or don’t think you can develop the skills to do so. These people are also known as Mediums. While there are some good and real ones out there, how do you really know which ones? How will you know that they can connect with your loved one? This is why I always encourage people who ask me about getting a Medium, to look into the portal for themselves. It happens all the time.

So what does this have to do with Linda’s experience? Well, I immediately realized that Linda was experiencing this particular shiny surface phenomenon. Although we don’t completely understand how it works. Although it may seem weird or spooky, Linda is neither freaked out or afraid. It was just something she was experiencing. She never got a bad feeling about it, even though she didn’t know how it was possible. It was just Thellis blowing her mind with his gifts.

Linda knows that she was/is not making this up. Have you ever noticed that when a spiritual experience is encountered, that it just happens out of nowhere? Even if you were to go back to recreate it or try to create another one, you can’t. It is either there or it’s not there, no matter how hard you try. My point is… these unexplained spiritual experiences really happen. While you are in awe, you might as well enjoy the wonder of them, right?

Sometimes, Linda is really in the mood to experience her loved one’s light show for her in the mirror… but it doesn’t always happen, no matter how hopeful she is to make it so. This, to her, lets her know that this is happening independently of her. When it does happen, sometimes the activity is light and sometimes dramatic. Sometimes there are more bells and whistles and super sparkly. Sometimes it is bright, sometimes more dim. 

Linda has come to realize that this is her dear loved one, Thellis, the love of her life and soulmate, trying to make his presence known while trying to say with the lit Christmas tree, “Merry Christmas!” “Happy Easter and new beginnings!” with all the bright and sparkly things she loves to brighten up her life. “I’m right next to you with the shadow that leaves the portal to be by her side.” And, my favorite, the lasso… hoping to rope her into knowing this is real and all for her. It’s like she gets to watch T.V. at work!

Hey, I’ve written commentaries on spiritual phenomena for a long time now. Nothing surprises me anymore. Plus, it doesn’t hurt that I have experienced many of them for myself. Being an open-minded skeptic, having varied personal experience of these is a necessity for me to know the truth of them but also, to even begin to explain them to others.

As far as after-death communications, some people are visited by their departed loved ones in dreams, some through blinking lights or other electronic methods, some through orbs, birds, flying insects and other animals. Then there are those who actually get a phone call from their loved one, or they see them materialize, or hear their voice out loud or in a song. There are literal signs, messages left (literal and metaphorical) for us to realize in the most obvious places. There is a lot of extraordinary evidence our loved ones give us to let us know they are around. Why couldn’t this visitation happen through a portal in a mirror?

Linda's description of movement

Linda’s description of movement

Linda's description of what appears in the alcove

Linda’s description of what appears in the alcove

A Hologram Spirit Visitation? Is That a Thing?

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While Kim peacefully slumbers, her departed husband, Terry, materializes as he literally watches over her while she sleeps.

Kim Writes:
“I read your latest post about ‘The Twilight Bridge.‘ You have no idea how timely this was for me. My experience with seeing Terry, happened just before dawn. I wake up several times nightly, look at the clock, sometimes watch the TV that I usually leave on now for “company” in hopes of keeping my mind occupied, so as not to dwell on my grief.”

“Recently, when I was still asleep, I was lying on my left side when I became aware of a big, blurry object hovering over my head, kind of kitty corner to the right of my face. It was about 12-13 inches away from my face. Still in dream state with my eyes closed, I kept trying to figure out what that “blurry thing” was. It looked like a huge head looking down over me. I kept looking at it when I suddenly realized it looked like my departed husband, Terry’s face!”

“His head looked to be about 12-14 inches wide, at least, and equally as tall. His eyes were closed due to his being over my head and looking downward at me or maybe because his head was hovering above mine and his eyes were looking downward. I kept wishing he would open his eyes to be more recognizable. I just wanted to look into his eyes.”

“His features were not very defined… but somehow I just knew it was Terry. The blurry shape was defined just enough for me to recognize his head shape and vague features. But why on earth was it just his head and why was it so HUGE?”

“It’s so hard for me to describe exactly how he looked, especially because his head was so big and blurry! Nothing else was around him, he did not even have a neck. Reminded me of that gigantic, round head only… projection (sort of a hologram) of The Wizard…from the old original movie, “The Wizard of Oz.”

“He said nothing. In all my after-death communications of him, I have NEVER heard him speak and usually have never had him actually look at me. But I vividly remember, that the moment I thought I recognized that it was indeed, him, my entire body started tingling wildly! I was so happy, I started crying and woke myself up calling out his name.”

“Having had after-death communications of him before and having this interesting reaction, I have come to realize that when I feel this tingling sensation, it IS TERRY verifying the after-death communication, along with his presence. That comforts me beyond belief, but also makes me cry uncontrollably… because I’m so lonesome for him. This coming May 8th he will have been gone for 1 year. It seems like forever… I’m still crying every day. All I have to do is think of Terry and the tears gush.”

“I’ve been wanting to ask, why doesn’t he talk to me?”

Commentary- It was in the mid 1800’s that British Scientist, John Henry Pepper, invented a 2D illusion technique that became very popular and was used for entertainment purposes. In plays, apparitions would materialize on stage with the actor, then would dematerialize, leaving the audience mystified by how this was possible. 

The technique required a large glass screen, set at an angle to catch the reflection from a brightly lit actor in an area that was not seen by the audience. The reflection of the glass screen looked eerily like a ghost.

Today, you will recognize this technology if you have ever been to The Haunted Mansion at Disneyland, where the funny looking ghosts appear to ride in the car with you as you pass by a mirror. Also, this same technique has been used in the theater, cinema, amusement parks, tv and concerts.

Hologram: Pixabay

Hologram: Pixabay

A Hologram is a little different from Pepper’s Ghost, as it is 3 dimensional light field. Hologram means “whole picture.”  Hungarian-British physicist, Dennis Gabor was awarded Nobel Prize in Physics in 1971 for his development of the holographic method. Similar to a sound recording, the hologram is a photographic recording of a light field which uses diffraction to reproduce a 3D light field, rather than an image formed by a lens. 

Today, Holograms, like the one in the Wizard of Oz that Kim chuckled about, are used as technology in Military Mapping, Information Storage, Medical Training, Fraud and Security and Holographic Art. A deceased musical artist may now attend their own concert in which they perform. And now, we understand even more about this technology and how it is rapidly expanding. It’s all so very amazing!

But, here’s the thing. There was not a group of artists, scientists or holographic technicians in Kim’s bedroom projecting a big-headed Terry, while she slept and experienced a real time occurrence at ‘The Twilight Bridge’ that morning. With the exception of Terry’s head, she was alone when that happened.

Although we don’t always understand the amazing “effects” in which a spirit, for example, can greatly astonish us with materializing or dematerializing, it still happens without our knowledge. And, although we don’t always understand the mechanics through which our departed loved ones send us signs, communicate with us or even touch us, I’m here to tell you that we are smart and advanced in our technology, but… we are mere novices compared to those in the Heavenly realms.

So yes, Kim. It really might have been some sort of heavenly hologram. That might even explain the distortion in size. In Star Wars, Princess Leia appeared unusually small (doll-like) during one of her transmissions to Luke Skywalker, if you remember? So, is a spirit hologram really a thing? Sure, why not? It’s a thing here, why not there? A hologram might help to explain what happened. In other words, anything we can do here, the Heavenly realm can do much better.

As I explained in ‘The Twilight Bridge,’ just because your eyes are not open when you have these spiritual experiences, please do not think that you are not seeing what you really are seeing… and actually in a much more real and clear way. One of the greatest spiritual practices is to learn to see with your eyelids closed. Your spiritual eyes are very adapt to seeing what’s actually there, you just have to practice. We have just been trained to value our physical sight a whole lot more.

Kim writes that she “became aware of” a big blurry object hovering over her head. To me, “Becoming aware” of something is an indication of a relaxed brain at the time. A relaxed brain is an access for something extraordinary to happen that is beyond the physical senses of this world. This is what happened to Kim that morning. Her brain was so relaxed that she didn’t freak out about the unidentifiable big head watching over her. After wondering about it for a while in her relaxed state, her brain eventually went back to being its’ vigilant, 5-sense self as it fully awakened once again to face another day… and in doing so, the vision and visitation dematerialized into thin air.

In writing this, and also being a Hypnotherapist, I just re-realized why the state of mind experienced at ‘The Twilight Bridge’ is so important in accessing spiritual information. Normally, during daily life, the brain is alert and focused on the tasks at hand. Maybe it is involved in grieving if that is what you are going through at the time, but my point is, the brain is not relaxed enough to allow a higher level of information in. I’m referring to spiritual information. The bandwidth of the brain is considerably more focused on the physical aspects of survival than that of the spiritual realms of fascination. This is why I suggest that when you are experiencing some spiritual phenomena at ‘The Twilight Bridge’ or any other place where you are engaging spiritually, that you linger longer without having to have an explanation. Take it all in. Stay relaxed and enjoy the mystery, the brilliance, the astonishment and the wonder of it all. When you awaken, write down as much as you remember while it is still fresh. You will be able to figure out some semblance of the experience then.

Kim wonders why Terry never says anything. It is possible that Terry is still communicating without moving his mouth? His communications say, “I am here.” “I am watching over you.” “I am guiding you from beyond.” “And, Yes, Kim, this is me by your side.” Could his words say more than his actions?

It is possible that Terry sees Kim, even if his eyes are not fixed on her. Obviously, he knows where she is. Perhaps he’s more of a non-confrontative type of spirit. Perhaps sharing his consistent, quiet and gentle soul with her is more of what she needs to feel comforted and heal.

Sometimes they appear… talk to us, look at us, touch us and sometimes they don’t. It is possible that it is not intended that we are to know they are here with us, but we see them anyway. These are the astonishing things that mystify us and we will eventually understand how it all works that we/they can somehow communicate between two worlds. Also… at the same time, although we imagine that we are apart for now, we might try to understand that thinking we could ever be separate is but an illusion. Our departed loved ones are always with us. Even if we can’t grasp it now. They are here. When you actually get this truth as an experience, those two worlds will become as one.

Image by deselect: Pixabay

Image by deselect: Pixabay

 

(Information about history of Pepper’s Ghost and Holography- Credit:Wikipedia)

The Twilight Bridge

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After her mother’s recent passing, a sorrowful Jan, is repeatedly visited by her mother on the Twilight Bridge.

Jan writes:
“It is difficult to find anywhere to ask this question and it has bothered me since my Mom passed away a year ago. I had been living with mom for about 8 years and helping her to live in her home. She was 99 years old and fell while I was with her and did not recover. So, I do feel guilt, but everyone tells me it is not my fault.”

“After she passed (I live in her home), I was half-asleep. She came into the bedroom. I saw her in my mind, very clear. My eyes were closed and I wanted to wake up but my body felt frozen. I saw her distinctly for about 3 seconds and immediately woke up.”

“The next month, I was still very upset when a similar thing happened. I was half-asleep and saw her in my mind come into the bedroom, sit in a chair and look at me, sort of like she was comforting me. I called out to her and immediately woke up.”

“Then again, another time, I heard her call my name while I was sleeping. In front of my face was a large pad of paper and a hand was writing on it, but I could not read it and again woke up.”

“This last week, (still very sad) I heard her ask me “What is the matter?” I heard myself speak out loud, “I am sad.” I don’t think I was in a deep sleep.”

“These do not seem like any regular dreams I’ve had. In fact, I don’t usually remember my dreams. I guess I really need to believe it is her but at the same time I am skeptical. I don’t know what to make of it all. I read that grief plays tricks on your mind and it is just the trauma of grief and not really the deceased person. My greatest wish is that it is really my mom and she is with me. That would calm me.”

Commentary- There is a stage of sleep we pass through as we begin to fully awaken. This stage is often associated with the memory of having vivid dreams, experiencing curious occurrences and a feeling of such realness, that it can leave one wondering what the heck just happened and what it all means. I call this stage the Twilight Bridge, for reasons I will explain.

Although I had certainly experienced this phenomenon before in my life and chalked it up as interesting, it didn’t become tremendously fascinating until after I had lost loved ones to death. It was only then that a pattern formed, when my departed would, many times, come to visit me there at the Twilight Bridge.

I call it the Twilight Bridge because it is that magical space between dimensions that connects a more liquid, lucid dream-like world to our solid, fixed waking world. It didn’t take me long to realize that, if I experienced a visitation with my departed loved one during this magical lucid stage, and especially if they were giving me some detailed information, which only happened on occasion, I only had minutes to write it down before the message quickly faded with the waking up to my daily world. Of course, I would remember the gist of what happened, but in thinking I would remember what happened so clearly later, to write it down, was a lesson in which I could never recover those complete fresh details ever again.

While deep in my grief, I would love to sleep, just for the possibility of a Twilight Bridge experience and what I would learn from it. I even trained myself, to the extent that I could, to monitor my dreams for visitations. I would practice lucidity and awareness. For instance, once I was aware that I was experiencing lucidity, I would train myself to look all around me to see what was there. To my surprise, I would often find departed loved ones right at the periphery of my awareness.

Sometimes the visitations were visual and aural with touch, like a regular visit with someone in this realm. Sometimes the visits were just auditory. But the voice was clear enough to not deny. There were times I was left with the memory of a feeling that something big and important had just happened. And… sometimes the messages would be more abstract and I would have to feel into the experience to decipher its true message.  But, whatever it was, it didn’t matter. It was one more chance to be with my loved one again in a way that was very real. Sometimes… even more real than in this physical realm. 

Having had my fair share of Out-of-Body Experiences, I did have the experience of actually meeting my loved ones in the space, part-way, between two worlds during that twilight time or twilight sleep stage. There was even one time when, while visiting with a deceased friend, I began to awaken, only to realize that I couldn’t move my body for a few minutes until I completely returned. At least that is exactly what it felt like to me.

I’m not even saying that we are meeting on an actual bridge somewhere. And maybe we are.  I am saying that the twilight state, in and of itself, seems to be the space for us to meet up between realms. And, that’s why I call it the Twilight Bridge. It’s a joy to experience.

Besides having these experiences during the twilight state where Jan would have the experience of being with her mother, she would also hear and see her as well. Although Jan was in a sleep state, she was on the Twilight Bridge. Jan was seeing with her spiritual eyes. Some people refer to them as the Third eye Chakra, others would say they were the eyes of the spirit. 

It’s funny but, we tend to think that using our physical eyes is where it’s at, as far as giving us information. Of course we would, dwelling in this physical realm. That’s what we are used to. But consider this. It is possible that we can actually see more sometimes, when our physical eyes are closed. We see some of the things the physical eyes might never see because of what the physical brain filters out as irrelevant to physical survival. Eyes closed in a particular meditative state makes it possible to connect more deeply with our spiritual self – a good self to know.

Learning to see with spiritual eyes has such value. Of course, your brain may not know what to think of it. And, that’s why people will doubt their spiritual experiences. Eventually, the brain that has no idea how to explain these things away, slowly begins to accept these unusual occurrences as legitimate experiences. 

Skepticism can be a good thing. Being cautious and even a little bit suspicious keeps us from being deceived in life and is considered useful to our brain for survival in our day to day experience. Also, filtering out what it thinks is irrelevant material, like it does, the brain might consider this spiritual stuff as made up fluff. Truth is… for many people, the brain has little use for a wild goose chase beyond the five physical senses. But… just because our finite brain doesn’t always understand or comprehend the spiritual stuff, it doesn’t mean it is not a “real” experience.

As far as Jan’s example of the traumatized brain playing tricks on one by re-creating departed loved ones? I have seen plenty of spiritual phenomena, including departed beings, while I was and was not traumatized by grief. It’s a thing! If it were true that grief-traumatized beings could hallucinate their departed loved one into existence… then why doesn’t it happen to the bereaved all the time? Honestly, you can’t manufacture an after-death communication. You can only provide the best space for it to occur.

It is common for a caretaker to feel guilty for one thing or another. As for Jan, the reality is that it was not your fault that your mother fell. I’m just impressed that your mother was still walking around at 99 years of age!

Also, your dreams were not regular dreams. They were vivid, distinct, memorable, remarkable and more real that the average non-sensical dreams. Your mother was definitely reaching out to you, repeatedly, just in case you had any doubts. Your mother doesn’t want you to feel guilty about her fall and that is was her time to go. She is at peace and out of pain. Your mother wanted you to know that and to comfort you in your sorrow over her passing. She has gone to great effort to show you that she is watching over you. The good news is that you are sensitive enough to allow her connection. 

The great thing is she let you know, for a certainty, that she lives. She survived the grave. She called your name so it would be clear to you that she was really with you and was really talking to you. The hand writing on paper represented the continued contact by your mother, in case you had any doubts of what she was doing. If there was an important message she was trying to leave you that you could not read, she would have made that message very clear. That part of that demonstration was abstract.

Now, since these amazing Twilight Bridge experiences don’t happen all the time, actually they do but we just don’t remember them, it is important for us to know that just because we don’t consciously see, hear, feel or experience them in some way, don’t for one moment think they don’t happen and that our departed loved ones are not present in our everyday lives. We only experience spiritual phenomena when we do and when there is a clear space for it to happen.

The only thing I would advise for anyone to do differently is to not “try” to wake up. Do not immediately engage in the physical world. In doing so, you are not only engaging the conscious brain with your return to this solid and fixed realm, but more importantly, you are pulling yourself out of the glorious, lucid space of your connection with your mom on the bridge. You have connected so many times with her in the space on the Twilight Bridge, already. Next time, stay there a little longer in that bliss to see what else happens.

In the meantime, trust your experiences. They are yours. 

A Representation of the Twilight Bridge

A Representation of the Twilight Bridge (Image by Pixabay)

The Medicine That Is Hope

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Just when all seems lost, a distressed Linda cries out to her beloved, Thellis, for help and receives it in a most unexpected and delightful way. 

Linda writes:
“I had not been on my game since just before Christmas. Slipping down into the deep end of the latest emotional abyss. There was something below, pulling on me, as I continued hanging on to the metaphorical life preserver of my grief.  Even amidst my grief, I would feel pretty darn good, calm and breathing air and all, then all of a sudden under water, swimming in emotion and struggling to get back up to save myself from drowning in my sorrow.”

“I found myself wanting to be reassured that nothing was wrong with feeling this way. That there was no problem with it. That this was all a normal part of the grief process, 
because to me, it looked all wrong, like it was a huge problem and I was feeling insane once again.”

“For a few nights before I left my house to visit my daughter who lives in another state, I kept waking up – two nights in a row, repeatedly throughout the night with immediate feelings of dread. The tidal wave of thoughts were so horrific that I not only felt bad emotionally, but physically as well. At the time, I could not see how I could keep doing anything like I normally would. How would I be able to drive hours to meet her? When I got back, how would I be able to go to work, pretend I was okay when I wasn’t at all? How could I pay my bills, look around for new place to live? How could I go on, not being able to stand myself in the state of mind I was in?”

“Looking at my life going forward, it was hard to see my way in such a dark gray, shabby world, with no ability to look forward to anything, enjoy anything, much less find a purpose to all this grief over the recent loss of my love, Thellis.”

“The recent torment I was experiencing, was all because I had hit some kind of strange wall of both physical and mental exhaustion that was making me have great difficulty putting one literal and metaphorical foot in front of the other. And worst of all, I was afraid I was going to forget how he looks and the sound of his voice. I always loved his voice.”

“It took everything in me to just finish packing and carry my things to my car. With all my strength, I said out loud to Thellis, “I want and need your help!” I didn’t know what Thellis would do to help me, but I knew there had to be a  part of him that wanted me to not be scared and hurting like this — and to enjoy my upcoming time with my daughter… our daughter, Marijo.”

Mourning Doves

Mourning Doves

“Now, I need to share a back story first before continuing. As I pondered my after-death communications from Thellis, I hoped that one of these days there would be an actual physical object showing up on this planet, that was so obvious, that there could be no doubt, even from a stranger’s viewpoint, that would be too amazing to explain away. I needed some solid proof, something tangible, but that had not happened yet. 
I had thought, and even said out loud over past 3 1/2 months, that I knew it could not be a dove, of course. The reason is because I’ve never seen one up here in my neck of the woods and certainly not now that it’s winter, but still reasoned that it sure would be nice since there was such a strong association of doves and Thellis. You see, Thellis loved those sweet mourning doves so much and the cooing noise they would make. He would imitate them sometimes during our conversations. So even though it could never be that, maybe it could be something else just as obvious to me.”

“So, now back to my current story. After I trudged to my car with my belongings and put them in the car, got in my car and was wishing that he would just touch me… immediately, for next couple of minutes, I felt as if a feather was tickling my face as I pulled out of my driveway. I even brushed my hand across my face to feel if something was there. Nothing was there but the feeling of a feather tickling around my face.”

“Then, as I drove out of out my neighborhood, to my complete surprise, I suddenly saw in the middle of my street- a flock of doves!  I’m so mad I didn’t take a picture but I was so stunned and remained that way- I didn’t even think of it. After all, it was below zero and still snow on the ground and I had never seen any doves since living here for the past 7 years. As if that was not enough, 15 miles down the highway, I pulled off to go to a convenience store. When I pulled into park, in my rear view mirror, that were 2 doves standing in a grassy area by the store. I was so happy. I immediately knew this was from him!”

“What happened next, I didn’t think possible. Immediately my physical and mental energy was restored. I was calm, peaceful, sane and hope was on the horizon that the future would not always be a cold, flat and colorless world. And now, more than anything, an absolute knowing that he was right there beside me and that we were and are eternally connected. With this experience I could see, at least a glimpse, of how something beautiful could be born out of this nightmarish pain of grieving.”

“I thought, “Maybe I could survive it after all and even help somebody else someday who was experiencing this kind of suffering. I just needed to trust the process, God and myself and refrain from beating myself up when I find myself in these emotional tidal waves that throw me to and fro in a full array of emotional insecurity when all of the sudden I’ve lost hope- as I did before Thellis helped me with the doves.”

Commentary- Anyone who has done some serious grieving is all too familiar with the frequent plunges into the deep end of the emotional sea of grief. The pain of grief is persistent, pervasive and anxiety producing, to say the least, as one constantly struggles to stay afloat. At times, the feeling of being so overwhelmed with the fear and panic of imminent devastation, can feel like the possibility of being swept up and carried out to sea. Just one lost soul out there in a sea of pain just trying to survive against the power and strength of relentless emotional waves. Sometimes, even emotional tidal waves of pain.

Yes. Grief can feel like this. Depending on your range of feeling, one might really identify with the above description. To some, this does not seem dramatic, but very familiar. It hurts, it’s devastating and there is little to do when one realizes that they are at the mercy of a grueling grief process that seems to have its’ own mind. Controlling the grief process? What’s that?

Lost boat in rough waters

Lost boat in rough waters

Processing deep grief can be so scary and dark, with many ups and downs and feelings of hopelessness and being out of control. It’s like being in a boat out to sea, alone and lost in stormy weather, with no way to know how to find your way back to the safety of saneness and stability. No, you just have to deal with each new emotional wave that crests.

There are some brief moments of reprieve, where one thinks they are out of the chaos of that storm, only to be reminded that, at least at the beginning of the grief process, those moments do happen at times, but are fleeting before disruption occurs once more. The good news is that relief becomes more and more of a constant as time and perspective gives way to healing. 

Although the grief process is commonly filled with a great degree of pain and despair, if there are suicidal thoughts, especially thoughts that include a suicidal plan, immediately seek help. Here is a link for my resources and emergency page for reference. For sure, deep grief is not for sissies. Keep processing though, find support because healing eventually happens. It really does just take time.

Grieving at such depth can bring up every insecurity possible, every fear. The chaos of grief can make one feel insane at times, too. Grief can cause physical and mental torment and exhaustion as Linda has described, enough to where she began to see a world without color, a life with no future, no purpose or meaning and therefore; no point to living. The loss of a loved one is sometimes so traumatic that it can occur like an assault, causing one to give up on any hope, whatsoever.

But then, something happened when Linda, in her weary state, reached out to ask Thellis for help. Thellis, knowing of her condition and plea began to answer. First the tickle of a bird feather around her face, followed by a lovely bouquet of many doves. It wasn’t as though these doves were off flying somewhere when she saw them, or that they were off on the side of the road, in the moment she needed it most, they were exactly, literally in her path! And, if the doves weren’t enough by themselves, she got the precursor of the tickle to let her know something was up.

What a special gift from Thellis, who gave Linda exactly what she wished for, but didn’t think possible. To Linda, this was nothing less than amazing that the doves she hadn’t seen in 7 years were right there before her. Doves that Thellis happened to love. The doves that were the physical proof she wanted to know, without a shadow of a doubt, that Thellis really does hear her, loves her and is there by her side.

But even with all those miracles, among them is the medicine of hope. Before Thellis’s signature gift to her, Linda was barely functioning. She was struggling, low in energy, in pain and in desperate need of help. After Thellis’s signature gift? Linda was restored to a vibrant, pain-free, energetic and excited self. Linda was completely healed in that moment that her hope was renewed. 

The medicine of hope is powerful. In Linda’s experience of receiving the signs she asked for, when she was at her very lowest and with the medicine of hope, Linda was instantly made whole. Immediately restored by her experience was the possibility of a life with color, a future  ahead of her, a purpose to serve others in deep pain, meaning, and a point to the living of that life. It’s amazing how hope can heal so quickly and thoroughly.

Our departed loved ones are with us. They may not always be able to show us, but they are. They are connected to our thoughts and feelings. They are connected to our lives. They are here to watch over and to help us through this life.  And, in time, we will be reunited with them. When that happens, there will be no more need to hope. There will be no more need for tears. With the joy from our reunion, our wishes and prayers will forever be answered.

Hope. Follow the Light on your path.

Hope. Follow the Light on your path.

Death From a Scientific Perspective

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An interesting scientific article, about the death of a loved one, offers a surprisingly encouraging and comforting perspective about afterlife existence.

Several years ago while grieving the loss of her husband, Jason, Lynda stumbled upon this NPR interview. She found it extremely comforting in a very fundamental way. Recently, Lynda shared this article with me. I found it so clear and amazing that I wanted to share it forward to those it might help to show that, in some ways, science and faith can interface in the best of ways. Hopefully, this interview will somehow assist in the comfort and healing of your loss.

Source:  NPR All Things Considered- 2015.
Host, Michele Norris and Guest, Commentator- Aaron Freeman, have the following conversation.

MICHELE NORRIS, host: Introduction of her guest:
“Commentator Aaron Freeman isn’t a person who does much planning ahead. However, if you like to look ahead to the future, he has some advice for you, advice on planning your funeral.”
AARON FREEMAN, guest:
“You want a physicist to speak at your funeral. You want the physicist to talk to your grieving family about the conservation of energy, so they will understand that your energy has not died. You want the physicist to remind your sobbing mother about the first law of thermodynamics; that no energy gets created in the universe, and none is destroyed. You want your mother to know that all your energy, every vibration, every Btu of heat, every wave of every particle that was her beloved child remains with her in this world. You want the physicist to tell your weeping father that amid energies of the cosmos, you gave as good as you got.”

“And at one point you’d hope that the physicist would step down from the pulpit and walk to your brokenhearted spouse there in the pew and tell him that all the photons that ever bounced off your face, all the particles whose paths were interrupted by your smile, by the touch of your hair, hundreds of trillions of particles, have raced off like children, their ways forever changed by you. And as your widow rocks in the arms of a loving family, may the physicist let her know that all the photons that bounced from you were gathered in the particle detectors that are her eyes, that those photons created within her constellations of electromagnetically charged neurons whose energy will go on forever.”

“And the physicist will remind the congregation of how much of all our energy is given off as heat. There may be a few fanning themselves with their programs as he says it. And he will tell them that the warmth that flowed through you in life is still here, still part of all that we are, even as we who mourn continue the heat of our own lives.”

“And you’ll want the physicist to explain to those who loved you that they need not have faith; indeed, they should not have faith. Let them know that they can measure, that scientists have measured precisely the conservation of energy and found it accurate, verifiable and consistent across space and time. You can hope your family will examine the evidence and satisfy themselves that the science is sound and that they’ll be comforted to know your energy’s still around. According to the law of the conservation of energy, not a bit of you is gone; you’re just less orderly. Amen.”

Commentary- When I think of science in general, I think of sterile environments, serious people in white lab coats and protective gloves and eyewear. When I think of physics, I think of mathematical formulas and the mechanics of matter and energy and remember that I was never great at math. Having lumped my sciences together, I imagined laboratory/clinical testing that is rather cold and impersonal. The process of hypothesis, evidence gathering, testing, measuring and observing, in an effort of proving a scientific theory, seemed stark and unfriendly to me. 

So for me, having personally experienced before, how very deep and devastating the grief of losing a loved one goes, I found this article’s perspective to be interesting and unusually reassuring in every way possible. I also found myself realizing that, on some level, my version of hard cold science and warm and fuzzy faith could possibly be describing some of the same things, just from different perspectives. Or… at the very least, they, in each of their viewpoints, form a simple foundation for science and faith to share in exploring existential questions of life, death and afterlife. The subject of matter and energy? Definitely more interesting to me now.

When confronted with a death of a loved one. By far, the deepest concern, even among people of faith, is whether their departed loved one still exist after their death. I mean, it’s natural that this question would begin to creep in. It’s a different world now. To go from being accustomed to experiencing our loved one with our usual physical senses for so long in the physical realm and then, suddenly, they are gone- no more to be seen, heard, felt or experienced in that same way is jarring. Without an after-death sign anywhere is sight, this might make one wonder about things that were previously just accepted and taken for granted.

It’s mind boggling to suddenly be forced to experience a departed loved one in a much different way, such as a spirit or an energy field… the subtle form of who they once were. In those who are abruptly thrust into facing such an existential crisis as a death, the survivors are forced into finding a deeper understanding and meaning for themselves. Of course, there are always some painfully nagging questions I  am asked about. Here are some of them-

  • I know what I’ve been taught, but does my loved one still exist? Really?
  • Is my departed loved one around me now?
  • Does my departed loved one remember me now? Care for me? Love me still? Am I important enough to be remembered?
  • Does my departed loved one know how I feel and what I’m thinking? I wish they knew. I wish I could tell them.
  • Can/will my departed loved one visit me at times or send signs for me?
  • Will my departed loved one guide my path and protect me throughout the days of my life?
  • Is my departed loved one happy and free?
  • Does my departed loved one want me to be happy and free?
  • Can my grief ever be healed? Will I ever smile again?
  • Will my departed loved one be there when I need them the most?

By the way, for anyone who might wonder about some of these same questions as well, my knowledge and experience informs me that the answer to all of these questions is yes, Absolutely.

So, where can science and faith possibly meet? Energy is the foundation we can build upon.

“The first law of thermodynamics, also known as Law of Conservation of Energy, states that energy can neither be created nor destroyed; energy can only be transferred or changed from one form to another. … In other words, energy cannot be created or destroyed.” What this means is that everything has always existed and can never not exist. It’s just that it can existed in one form or another.

The end is not really the end. There is no end. Even science, The Law of Conservation of Energy agrees. Not one bit of you (the foundational part of you) is gone. Like water, ice and condensation is the same just a different consistency, the form is another form now. Physical is now subtle energy. And, at some point, that can change form, too.

We are still together. Although we can’t explain exactly what that looks like, because we can’t comprehend that far outside of what our brains can think, we are made from the same energy fabric, always and forever. How could we not be together- always and forever? 

“You need not have faith; indeed, you should not have faith.” Because science knows what we’ve previously just had faith about. “They can measure, that scientists have measured precisely the conservation of energy and found it accurate, verifiable and consistent across space and time. You can hope your family will examine the evidence and satisfy themselves that the science is sound and that they’ll be comforted to know your energy’s still around. According to the law of the conservation of energy, not a bit of you is gone; you’re just less orderly. Amen.”

In other words, a departed loved one may not have a physical body at this time, but it doesn’t mean they no longer exist. They are just subtle energy now. It’s all energy though. We are all nothing but energy. We are one, together, always and forever.

They are a part of you, too. Even now, you influence them and they influence you. Energetically, they might even visit or give you a sign of their continued existence. They are still here, warming the way for us, through us and being our light as we wade through a chaotic world. Yet, with all these possibilities, many times, the saddest part of us falls prey to the belief that our departed loved one is far from us. Out there. Over there, somewhere… as if there were such a thing. What if they are over here, with us, within us, always and forever. What if that was not just a belief but an absolute knowing, instead? Without a sure knowledge, why would we choose to have the sad belief over the comforting one?

The author writes about what to tell the grieving widow, “All the photons that bounced from you (deceased husband) were gathered in the particle detectors that are her eyes, that those photons created within her constellations of electromagnetically charged neurons whose energy will go on forever.”

There is a lasting impression left on each of us, by us. In the physical realm, and in an energetic way, we recognize and bear witness of one another and our experiences, always to be remembered. And even… until the point at which we may be re-membered to each other- in another form. How exciting it is that we have the possibility of being together, forever with our beloved ones while we experience them in different ways.

A Physicist many not say it like this, like a person of faith would, that the distillation of a departed person’s energy is also known as spirit, and some might, but to me, what both are saying is basically the same thing. One is stated from more of a clinical and impersonal perspective, while the other explanation of faith may occur as a more warm, fuzzy, personally meaningful way. What if both ways of discovery were legitimate? And not, one perspective is valid and the other is not.

spirit: photo credit pixabay

spirit photo credit: pixabay

If we still exist in some form or another aspect of that form, what else are we without a physical shell, if we are not spirit energy? I never realized that science could be so reassuring when it came to death and an afterlife. But in allowing the perspectives of science and faith to interface, I take it as further evidence of what I’ve always known spirituality to be. Both perspectives working together can give us reassurance, comfort and hope. In the end, we never die. All is well.

energy photo credit: pixabay

energy photo credit: pixabay

 

The Spiritual Magic of Engagement

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On the five year anniversary of Marcus’s passing, Karen gets a delightful surprise visit from her love, as she visits his memorial tree.

The Path

On October 11, 2020, Karen wrote:
“Five years ago today, my love, Marcus, lost his earthly life to depression/suicide. On this day, I planned a trip to the memorial tree that I chose for him years ago. It had been almost a year since I visited our tree where I left a painted rock for him- so many years ago. I actually contemplated not going, using the cold wind as an excuse- and knowing he can feel my love from anywhere.”

“This year, I made a special ornament with a poem on it to leave for him, so I decided to go to the path to where I thought the tree was. To my disappointment, I realized that it had been so long, that I had forgotten which tree it was that I left the original memorial rock. I walked around and found another tree, this time, a pine tree that I named our “Christmas tree”. I told my love that I would make this our new tree since I forgot where the original one was. I hung the ornament and talked to him for a while.”

“As I left the tree and started walking down the path, my eye caught a yellow painted rock hidden in a tree trunk. I laughed and wanted it to be a sign from my love, but it didn’t resonate as anything other than amusing, and I almost kept walking.”

Yellow rock

Bug-like rock with eyes

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

“Be Engaged”

“However, my eyes noticed another painted rock in the tree with a message that said, “be engaged.” I thought it was a cool message and wanted it to be a sign for me, but the message didn’t really resonate either.”

 

 

 

 

Original Rock

“Next, I looked down and noticed blue colored leaves that stood out. Curious about it, I looked further and found the original stone that I painted for Marcus and left a few years earlier. That is when I knew this was our tree!”

 

 

 

 

“Then, low and behold, if that was not enough, I saw a red rock under the leaves close by. I pulled it out. It was a brightly painted red rock with eyes on it. When I turned it over, the message for me said, “u are loved.”

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Wow! Talk about a sign! I could feel my love laughing and rejoicing that I found his sign- as I almost did not!! What an amazing day! I felt so blessed and wanted to share with everyone that this is proof- after 5 years. A lot has changed in my life- but love never dies- and they never leave us!!”

Commentary- If we take a close look at the chronological happenings of Karen’s experience, a pattern begins to form in which an important lesson comes into view.

  1. Completely unaware of somehow passing, and unable to find Marcus’s original memorial tree ahead, Karen finds another tree to rename as their new tree. But interestingly enough, on her way back, Karen notices a curious yellow spotted bug-like rock with eyes. Obviously, this is a sign that means “to look and see.” Although Karen wanted it to be a sign, this rock didn’t seem to resonate. In thinking that a sign or message is unrelated to us, how many times has that happened to us all?
  2. Next, Karen literally sees the sign that says, “Be Engaged.” Again, although nice, Karen brushed it off as not applicable to her. Again. Thinking that a sign or message is “nice” but is unrelated to us, how many times has that happened to all of us? A lot of the time.
  3. It was at that time that the strange appearance of bluish leaves caught her eye that she found the original rock that made her realize the this was their tree! It was only after the strange blue leaves that she started to really tune in. Karen became engaged at a higher level and was now available for some spiritual magic. (To clarify, when I talk about spiritual magic, I’m not referring to anything negative or occult-like. When I talk about spiritual magic, I mean something heavenly and extraordinary, that it rarely occurs in everyday life).
  4. Now, Marcus had her attention! But what was he trying to say? While bent over, Karen noticed the red rock with big eyes as if to see and say to her, “Are you engaged now? Look and see my signs and message.”
  5. In turning the rock over on the five year anniversary of Marcus’s passing/transition, Karen knew everything she could ever want to know from Marcus. That in her remembering of Marcus and their love on that very special day, she too, was remembered and loved by Marcus, as well. 

The definition of “engage” means to be interested in, involved in and that there is something to pay attention to. Although at first, each sign upon Karen’s path seemed to be unrelated, all the signs were clearly trying to get her attention and hoping beyond hope that she would not miss the prize. When she finally found it, it was all too clear from Marcus’s proud and joyful laughter, that his message was successfully delivered to his love on that special day. 

But, Karen came close to missing this. If it weren’t for the strange blue leaves, she might have left disappointed that her love was silent on that day. She might have become insecure- cried and doubted, too. She might have gone home and wondered if Marcus is still around and if he still cares about her after these five years. (By the way, our loved ones are around, and do care about us always).

However, all too often, signs are right in front of us. Without the magic of engagement and that spark of curiosity contained therein, those same signs might be over-looked. Instead of recognizing them, these special signs are wasted on us as easily dismissed… or perhaps just chalked up to wishful thinking. With this way of thinking, we miss so much of the beauty of spiritual magic that exists right in our path and just beyond our vision. In missing it, we miss the prize, too.

As humans, consumed with our daily lives, you can see how easy it is to become disengaged to any spiritual magic. As we dwell on this physical plane, with so much going on, it takes a lot of energy to generate presence in each moment. Engagement is not so much a thing we do, as a way of being. It requires our focus and attention. When we lose the wonder and awareness of our inner child, we trade them in for practicality. Worst case scenario is that our faith wanes and we become apathetic and resigned. The danger in this is, we risk missing the very thing that would make our heart sing and bring us the new-found life that was so apparent in Karen’s experience. She was so impacted by her magical encounter with Marcus that she literally wanted to shout it to the world! And, so she did!.

As in Karen’s case, it was only after experiencing some small, and seemingly unrelated things, that she was able tune in to see the bigger picture that was so beautifully laid out before her.  Though, seeing the larger picture is rarely possible if we are not engaged in the first place. If we practice becoming more fully engaged, that also means aware, involved and interested in, we become available to spiritual magic. However, like the open, believing and faithful child of wonder we once were, this is no longer automatic for us. As children growing to adulthood, this is something we have learned to forget. And now, as adults, this is something we must learn to rediscover, practice and apply in our daily lives if we are to have access to those spiritual treasures.

Karen got an awesome experience from Marcus. She wasn’t expecting it, but it happened just the same. And, sometimes it happens, sometimes it doesn’t. But, being engaged is a good place to start. Keep the faith. As the spiritual world seeks our attention and engagement, and wants us to look and listen, their message is to convey to us that we are not alone and we are so loved. Through the many millions of after-death communications from beyond, some of which are our own, we know this is a fact. So, let us not casually look on in obliviousness, for the next sign we will never see. When we are engaged in the spiritual magic on our life’s path, that’s when spiritual magic happens.

Special Occasion Visitations

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On the 4-year anniversary of his passing, Liz’s father reminds her that he is aware of this day, and makes his presence known to her on her laptop via Skype.

On July 14, 2020, Liz wrote:
“It’s been awhile, but I got another message today. Today is the 4th year of my Dad’s passing.”

laptop

laptop

“I came home this afternoon and turned on my laptop. It was doing an update. Once it had finished, the screen stayed black for an extremely long time, which made me wonder if something had gone wrong. Eventually, it sorted itself out and my desktop appeared, but I knew something was still going on in the background.”

“I waited, and eventually it all settled down when I notice an extra icon on my taskbar. It was Skype. I never use Skype. I put my curser on it and it said I was logged in. That was strange so I clicked on “log out” but instead of logging out, it brought Skype up.”

“When I looked at it, Billy, my partner, looked at it too, and asked, “Why are you looking at Skype?”  I told him it had started by itself. He asked me the last time I had used Skype. It was 4 years ago after my Dad passed. It was only then that I suspected a visit from my Dad.”

“We weren’t able to go back to the UK for his funeral, since he passed the day we arrived home from visiting him. My family told me not to come back, that we’d been there and seen him just days before and that we could be involved in his funeral via Skype, which we did.”

“So, I’ve come to the conclusion that this was Dad presenting himself on the very day of his passing, just four years later. I went into my update history and today’s update was a general windows 10-monthly update. There was nothing about Skype being included in it.”

Commentary- Sometimes our departed loved ones present themselves to us on special occasions such as, significant dates we once shared together, like holidays, birthdays and anniversaries. Although we normally tend to think of these special occasions as relatively happy events, after experiencing a painful loss, they are now sad, especially when the pain of a loved one’s passing is still fresh and unprocessed.

Even though we will always love and miss our departed ones, as we heal properly through the grief process, a visitation like the one Liz experienced, four years after her father’s passing, likely made her smile in awe and wonder. With the benefit of time, healing and a positive perspective, she avoided the all too common emotional breakdown of one newly affected by such loss, still reconciling and coping with the devastation it created.

Liz has had her share of visitations from her father, as well as others who have gone ahead of her. But knowing Liz the way I think I do, a long distance friend I’ve never met from another continent, who, in words and tone of emails, shares with me her experiences, I think I am safe to say that Liz handles the possibility of spiritual visitations with grace. She is open to receiving them… but does not go out to chase down these magical experiences. However badly she might want them, she allows them to come to her. And they do… whenever they do.

Some sad and frustrated grievers might wonder, “How come my departed loved one never visits me… especially on these important events that held so much meaning?” “There must be some reason. Are they mad at me? Have they forgotten me? Don’t they love me anymore? Am I doing something wrong?” “If I don’t have a visitation from them, I’m going to freak out!”

I’ve heard a variation of the above questions from concerned grievers so often and it breaks my heart. It does seem that in such a vulnerable and raw state of grief, our worst fears tend to surface. As if dealing with the loss of a loved one isn’t enough, our deepest fears (all the unknowns things of death) rear their ugly heads to further torment us by inflicting more pain. The disorientation of this new experience and what it entails, can be deeply unsettling and confusing. We just want a sign to help us feel better!

Given the fear that can come up in the face of a death, it’s easy to jump to the worst conclusions we can think of, instead of the best ones. Why is that? Why are we so quick to question the love and bonding we shared upon this Earth, and why so easily?

A positive and healthy perspective goes a long way here. Here is an example. If one comes from the perspective of scarcity, the tendency for that one will be to view/experience the world from a place of insecurity, unworthy, desperation, fear, never having enough of something, and thinking, “It”- (whatever “it” is) never happens to me. “It happens for others but not for me.” And… the one who sees the world in that way will see the world that way… and that one will be right. 

However, if one comes from the perspective of abundance, the tendency for that one will be to view/experience the world from a place of security, worthiness, patient confidence, opulent faith, grace, and thinking, “It could happen to me at any moment, just because it can. And, when it does… I’ll be there for it with an attitude of awe and wonder.” Perspective is powerful. Perspective is everything.

For sure, there is a huge difference between those perspectives. You can feel it in the energy of the words. The one with that powerful perspective generously allows into their experience, so much more.

perspective- dark and light

perspective- dark and light

You see, the experiences of our lives, live themselves out in the perceptions of our choosing, making our lives darker or lighter, heavy or more effortless. However, we are barely conscious or responsible for this. We pretend to have no choice in the matter. It’s just something that’s happening TO us.

Instead of allowing the dark side of fear and scarcity to take us down so quickly, without a fight, perhaps we can remember what really matters when the ‘rubber hits the road.’ While our loved one dwelled here physically with us on this planet, our departed loved us and bonded with us in complex ways that we could never begin to unravel. Our love is our commitment. Why would they simply forget about us now? They could not. It is fear and scarcity speaking that says they could forget you.

Even if you think your departed loved one isn’t here for you on your special occasion, our departed loved ones are here for us in whatever way they are. Trust that. We don’t always get a say in how that looks to us. And, sometimes they surprise us and we do. However, experiencing from the lens of abundance definitely helps to decrease our suffering, giving us the possibility of quicker healing too..

Give yourself some space to see from a positive and healthy lens. The hurtful questions of scarcity don’t need to be entertained. Have some faith in yourself and the love you invested in your loved one while you dwelled together on this planet. Have some faith in them, and the love they invested in you, too. Next time fear raises its ugly head to wonder about your status with your departed loved one, ask yourself this- “What would love do? What else would love do but keep on loving you?”

Abundance

Abundance