Are You Still Here?

In this after-death communication, Bill hears his departed wife’s favorite song repeatedly as a reminder that she has not really departed after all.

Bill writes-
“My wife loved music from the 50’s, 60’s and 70’s. One of her favorite groups was ABBA. She especially loved the song, Dancing Queen. On several occasions, when feeling depressed and missing my wife, I would think about her and suddenly the song, Dancing Queen would play. Here are a few examples of such occasions that come to mind.”

Occasion 1
“I was walking through the parking lot headed into Lowes Hardware Store. I was thinking about her and feeling sad, As soon as I walked in, the Dancing Queen began playing over the store’s loud speaker system. That made me smile.”

Occasion 2
“While leaving the parking lot at work, I drove past the spot outside where I would go everyday, sometimes 2 to 3 times a day, to call my wife, check in and tell her I love her. On this day in particular day, I glance over at the spot as I drove by. I was overcome with sadness, thinking about all the years I stood there and called her every work day, regardless of the weather.”

“As I pulled away into the traffic, I turned the radio on. The song that was playing, suddenly ended and immediately after, ABBA’s Dancing Queen began to play!”

Occasion 3
“Six years ago, my wife and I purchased a German Shepard puppy. My wife was the one who always arranged the vet visits for our dog, much like she coordinated doctor and dentist visits for our two kids growing up.”

“After her passing, on one evening, our dog suddenly became ill. My son and I rushed him to the Emergency Vet at 2am. We had to leave our dog overnight for observation.”

“I prayed that our dog would be okay, but I also asked my wife to help us with the situation if she could.”

” The next morning we found out that it was just a very bad case of indigestion and our dog
would be okay. My son, my daughter and I rushed to the vet hospital as soon as we were able to go pick him up and bring him home. Once home, I had to leave to run some errands.”

“As I left the house and walked to the car, I thanked my wife for helping us with our dog. I got in the car, started it, and turned the radio on. Immediately, the DJ announced ABBA Dancing Queen and the song began playing. I burst uncontrollably into tears, literally shaking and sobbing. It was as if my wife just answered me, saying she’s here looking over us all.”

Commentary- That is because she was… and still is.

Existence
Many believe that once their loved one has depart this life, they are “gone.”  We hear it all the time in trite comments intended to explain the consequence of a life newly ended. We hear things like “Grandma has gone on now.” or “When he left this world, he left me behind.” Then, there is my personal favorite (not really), that our loved ones “move on” from us, “over there, somewhere”.

This implications of this sentiment just feel cruel. In my experience, it derives more from the  lineal thinking of a human brain, rather than that of a multi-dimensional mind of spirit consciousness. To me, it is to say that if we can’t experience them on the physical plane, like we once did when they were in a body suit, then… they must be “gone.” Right?

It’s true that in some people’s thinking, “gone” means the deceased no longer exist. However, in other’s thinking, “gone” means that their beloveds, who are no longer here anymore, still do exist in some form but… somewhere else. Usually, that somewhere else exists far away. At least that’s how it might feel. Thoughts stemming from loss are quite painful.

Sure, those left behind go to their departed loved ones physical graves. They visit and bring flowers. However, the reality is that this is just a physical place to visit. We mourn the loss of their physical remains because it is what remains in the physical world. 

And, of course, when we go to their grave site, our beloveds meet us there. We may cry, talk to and remember them. We try to make amends and tell them all the things we wished we could have said. We apologize for what we shouldn’t have said or did. But, when we depart, we don’t leave them behind at their graves. Our “departed” beloveds depart with us. They do this because that’s who they are now. They can easily travel with us. Can you imagine the convenience factor without the limitations of the body suit?

Location, Location, Location!

If it is true, that when our loved ones pass, they leave us and go away… where do they go? Do they fly? Take a bus? Walk? Just how far do they go? Do they take off to another planet? Galaxy? Do they really leave us behind? Or is this just something we think is so? Why might we think that way?

Perhaps… because it is our worst fear ever! Death and loss tend to drive up all of our stuff and every thing that’s wrong.

It could be that we think they are gone because their existence is no longer apparent to us. But this doesn’t mean they are far away. Maybe it is that they exist just outside of our everyday awareness. They are aware. But, some of us?… Not so much. If we deepen and broaden our faith, perspective and ability a little more, they could become more noticeable to us.

If you really think about it, you could come to the conclusion that our beloveds are still right here, close by. I mean, who says they have to leave us? One could say that they exist at the edges of the spectrum where this world ends and the spiritual existence begins. Do you want to know where that is? That is right next door. 

Dancing Queen

Bill was overwhelmingly elated that his beloved wife answered him by the many times her signature song, “Dancing Queen”, played when he needed to hear from her the most. He sobbed at the realization that she had not “gone” away. In his words, she was telling him, “I’m right here. I’m watching over you!” In that very moment, I’m sure that Bill transitioned from being a believer to a knower of this truth. His tears of sadness mingled together with his tears of joy as a new, fuller and more promising reality emerged. His connection with her was not broken.

Are They Still Here? (Part 1)

Fear will tells us no. The fear of not knowing for certain. The fear of being a fool for daring to believe. The fear of being let down. The fear we may have that there is something more important to them, than us and their love for us. These are all the fears of insecurity.

It is not lost on anyone who has experienced a tragic loss, that after the crushing blow of a serious loss, comes another crushing blow in the form of insecurity and instability. That becomes the new compounded miserable experience that snowballs forth until we can get a handle on it. 

Are They Still Here? (Part 2)

On the other hand, love and faith have something to say as well. They say,”Yes! “”They are right here, right now. Take a deep breath. It’s going to be okay, you will get through this.”

No matter what anyone else says, they really are still here. Of course, it is daring to believe at first. Accepting the down side of life with grace can be a challenge. But what else would love do?

Trust them.

Our loved ones are so close, they do watch over us. They communicate in many ways. They are with us at the store, at the vet, at home, at work and in all those old places we spent time together.

They listen to us and answer our questions in the ways that only they can. These answers occur within a wide range of signs and communication modes. We just need to trust them and learn to listen deeply into nothingness. Much of the time, this is where we hear them best.

A Story About Love

If you choose to view it this way, this physical existence can be viewed as a story about love. Where, even under the most difficult life’s circumstances, we have the will to rise up from the ashes when we have been badly devastated. We persist for the sake of love. We press forward, doing our best and having the courage to heal our deepest pain. We can know and have faith that this is not goodbye. It’s more like, I’ll see you later.

But know this. Our “departed” loved ones love us, care about us and are aware of the strides we make in our everyday lives. They are proud, too. They comfort us through our heartbreaks. Our loved ones are among us in ways we can’t imagine. They watch over us. 

Once one realizes that you can’t ever be parted from something you’re a part of, your pain softens, your head, heart and body begin to heal and you gain confidence in this new unseen world in which our beloveds now exist. Again, this unseen world is right next door. Someday, we will live there too.

The most powerful force in the Universe, IS love. In time, you may eventually realize this and that love really does transcend the grave. I mean… if the power of love couldn’t do it, what could? 

A heart in the night sky

Photo credit: denflinkegrafiker

Loneliness After Loss

Among all the stages of grief, probably the hardest part is the loneliness. The vast missing of a beloved seems to extend forever in all directions for a time.

Art and Sally

Art and Sally were married for 54 years. When Art, suddenly passed away just over a year ago, It broke Sally’s heart. Since then, Sally has been grieving and missing her husband terribly.

Throughout their marriage, Art loved to take care of things for Sally, inside the house… and out. He was very handy, capable and could fix just about anything.

In the warmer months, you could see Art outside, wearing his sun hat, either on his tractor or physically working in the yard around the family house they built for themselves. In fact, he liked hats so much that when they would go on any adventure, he would buy a baseball hat as a souvenir. Continue reading

Knock Knock. He’s there!

In this After-death Communication, Marie is visited by her beloved husband, with a series of knocks on her window, on two separate occasions.

Marie writes to me:
“In April of 2023, my dear husband of 45 years, passed away suddenly from a fall in our garage. I found him, and was so sad I wasn’t there to help. He wasn’t sick. He had a vibrant life. He loved flying and was training for an aerobatics competition, and still had a beautiful head of blonde hair!”

“The day he died, there was a large white egret (water bird) in our tree. We live in the desert.”

First occurrence,
“A few months later in June, I was sitting in the family room with our dog. I was still very sad. There were two gentle knocks on my window. I thought I was hearing things. Then, there were three knocks on my window. Puzzled, my dog heard those, he got up ran toward the window and stopped.” Continue reading

When Heaven Comes to Us

In the last nine days of her brother, Joseph’s life, Marijo and her mother experience a preview of the heaven that awaited their loved one.

Marijo writes:
I was very blessed to experience a beautiful shared-death experience with my younger brother in July of 2021.

Just 8 days prior, he made the decision to pass peacefully in a hospice facility. His body had completely been wrecked by his progressive auto-immune disease and a pathogen found in his lungs after a bout of Covid. His physical body was in failure and he was working with a body that could no longer fight.

For nine days, my mother, Toni, and I sat with him. My mother’s worst fear was he would die alone. My fear was she would be alone to watch him pass. As other family came in and out, we left the room for brief periods to eat, rest, shower, and pray. Continue reading

“Shedding Light on Trauma”

A Tribute to Beloved Christian, New personal challenges on the horizon and the “Shedding Light on Trauma” modality, all tied together in one post
Our Beloved Christian

It was on March 31, 2010, that Christian suddenly left this plane. When I think back now, I remember the severe pain and trauma created from his death and what it brought up for me.

At one point, the pain was too deep to describe. My grief had no language yet, to express what I had suddenly been bombarded with. This is a thing, for sure. With so much bombardment, the brain gets scrambled in many different directions. These are some very challenging times without the words. But eventually we do find them again. Continue reading

The Beauty of a Spiritual Practice

One morning while Jennifer meditates, she is privy to an extraordinary event- her brother’s release from this world and his transition to the next

Jennifer writes:
“On the morning March 31st, I had returned to my bed to meditate quietly as my husband had not yet awakened. I was in a quiet place with my thoughts subsiding and a beautiful indigo blue vision appeared in front of me. Awake but with closed eyes I was overwhelmed with deep calm peacefulness, joy and bliss.”

“The vision was like a balloon inflating and deflating …very deep dark edges and lighter fading into a centre of almost white. It was a light dimming and glowing before me. I felt if I reached my hand out I would feel it but did not want it to go away so I enjoyed the bliss while it lasted, which felt like 2-4 minutes.” Continue reading

Hugging a Departed Loved One

After Jan repeatedly asked her departed mother for a hug, her heart’s desire is realized. Twice!

The Twilight Bridge

The Twilight Bridge

Jan writes:
“I had a couple of “dreams” again of my mom, but I am not sure if it was a regular dream or a “twilight bridge” dream. What I wrote to you before in “The Twilight Bridge” post were definitely not dreams. That much was obvious.”

“Now, I will try and explain my question to you. I had said out loud for many weeks that I wanted to hug mom. Then, I had two different dreams. Both were in the same setting, it seemed outside somewhere, not here in the house. It was like I drifted into an outdoor area where my mom was socializing with some people. She noticed me, smiled and greeted me with these people around her. It seemed like she was by a car. In trying to make sense of it all, I thought we were going on one of our short trips for the weekend or maybe we were there already.” Continue reading

Visitations Through the Portal

One night last Christmas time, while making her rounds in the hospital, Linda notices something very interesting in the hospital safety mirror. 

Linda writes:
“This past December of 2020, marked 3 months since the transitioning from this earthly realm of the only man I ever truly deeply loved since I was 25 years old. Due to circumstances in each of our lives we could not be together, but we share a beautiful daughter, and love between us never ended and never will.”

“I was really struggling and in so much sorrow and pain. And although I was so very blessed as to receive some very special signs/communication from him, I just could not seem to find at times, my way out of that deep dark place of loss.” Continue reading

Healings From Our Departed

While Melisa is sick and scared and unsure of what to do, Grandma mysteriously appears and miraculously heals her ailments.

Melisa writes:
“I am trying to make sense of an experience that I had several months ago and am not able to find any similar experiences online and am interested in trying to find out if others have seen the same thing as I have.”

“One night I felt feverish with chills, so I went into my closet and put on a robe that used to be my grandmother’s robe that she gave to me. I went back to bed but was unable to sleep. I began to feel more ill and was so scared that I might die because my heart was beating so fast and I was silently crying. I was on the verge of waking my husband who was sleeping next to me and ask him to take me to the ER.” Continue reading

The Twilight Bridge

After her mother’s recent passing, a sorrowful Jan, is repeatedly visited by her mother on the Twilight Bridge.

Jan writes:
“It is difficult to find anywhere to ask this question and it has bothered me since my Mom passed away a year ago. I had been living with mom for about 8 years and helping her to live in her home. She was 99 years old and fell while I was with her and did not recover. So, I do feel guilt, but everyone tells me it is not my fault.”

“After she passed (I live in her home), I was half-asleep. She came into the bedroom. I saw her in my mind, very clear. My eyes were closed and I wanted to wake up but my body felt frozen. I saw her distinctly for about 3 seconds and immediately woke up.” Continue reading

The Medicine That Is Hope

Just when all seems lost, a distressed Linda cries out to her beloved, Thellis, for help and receives it in a most unexpected and delightful way. 

Linda writes:
“I had not been on my game since just before Christmas. Slipping down into the deep end of the latest emotional abyss. There was something below, pulling on me, as I continued hanging on to the metaphorical life preserver of my grief.  Even amidst my grief, I would feel pretty darn good, calm and breathing air and all, then all of a sudden under water, swimming in emotion and struggling to get back up to save myself from drowning in my sorrow.” Continue reading

Death From a Scientific Perspective

An interesting scientific article, about the death of a loved one, offers a surprisingly encouraging and comforting perspective about afterlife existence.

Several years ago while grieving the loss of her husband, Jason, Lynda stumbled upon this NPR interview. She found it extremely comforting in a very fundamental way. Recently, Lynda shared this article with me. I found it so clear and amazing that I wanted to share it forward to those it might help to show that, in some ways, science and faith can interface in the best of ways. Hopefully, this interview will somehow assist in the comfort and healing of your loss. Continue reading

A Thanksgiving Vibe

On this day of giving thanks, Kim experienced some extra special Thanksgiving vibes which made her very grateful.

Georgie

Georgie

Kim writes:
“Jade! Something odd happened today. I was sitting in the living room with my dog, Georgie, on the footstool in front of me. We were watching the Thanksgiving Day parade. Feeling horrifically sad, I was crying hard. I was thinking of my husband, Terry, of course, my first holiday without him.”

“In my hand, I had this necklace that was made a long time ago. Back then, when I asked Terry to give me a phrase to have printed on it, the phrase he gave me was: “You are my world and my eternity.” I don’t usually wear jewelry, but for some reason, on this day, I wanted to feel Terry’s words close to me.” Continue reading

There Is No Place Like Home

In this after-death communication, Kim’s husband, Terry, hunkers down as a spirit in his home, until he’s good and ready to go to the light.

Kim writes:
“Terry, my husband of 36 years, passed away 6 weeks ago from a horrific battle with prostate/bone cancer. I cannot stop crying.”

“About 5 weeks after his passing, I had a dream that I saw him in his bedroom putting on his pajamas. There were 2 young girls that I did not know standing there. They were in their teens and had long, wavy hair that was parted in the middle. Pardon me for sounding snotty, but they were rather homely looking. They looked almost like twins. Both were wearing a sleeveless, cream colored, slip-over type dress. The material was lightweight and the girls were barefoot.” Continue reading

Stress and the Grief Process

Understanding how stress plays a sizable part in the Grief Process and ways to decrease it to make grieving easier.

At one time or another, we’ve all experienced periods of intense stress in our lives. Some of these stressors might include: food, housing and job insecurity, political unrest, family issues, enduring abusive relationships, trouble with or losing a relationship, being in poor health or losing a loved one through death. Continue reading