Moving Forward After Loss

In a moment of deep sorrow, Lynda’s departed husband, Jason, compassionately reminds his beloved wife, that he is not his ashes. 

Lynda writes:
“Last summer, I went to my cabin where I left Jason’s ashes. That’s where he loved to be. I had not seen them since I put them in the box the year before. I usually just hug the box they are in, but this time, I had a desperate need to see and feel his ashes through the plastic. I was hoping it would give me some closure. I miss him very much.”

“The first night, I sat and watched a movie with the bag on my lap. It was very comforting. The next day, I found myself hugging the bag of Jason’s ashes and crying. I kept telling myself, “It’s not him” and that I needed to let go of his physical remains. Then, I heard a voice in my head repeating, “It’s not ME!” This seemed odd, as I had ME, telling myself that it was not HIM. It was so clear that I immediately felt it was Jason, and he was with me, and affirming all this, which was very comforting. I still can’t bring myself to spread Jason’s ashes yet, but have been thinking about it.”

“I’ve also spent a lot of time clearing out my garage and basement. I kept getting a tingling on the back of my neck that makes me shiver really hard. I have never experienced that before. I talk to him a lot there, and it is a comforting feeling.”

Commentary- It’s coming up on two years since Lynda’s beloved husband, Jason, crossed over from this world to the next. Although she’s spent time grieving, Lynda’s pain is still fresh, as she continues to work her way through the many layers of loss and grief.

Although she somehow manages to carry on, her life is much different now. She spends her days keeping busy, as this staves off the relentless pain still lying beneath the surface. She misses Jason deeply, as he will always have a special place in her heart, mind and soul.

Having the need for some closure, Lynda went to her cabin to hold Jason’s ashes. There… she put them on her lap, she held them, she hugged them as she cried and expressed to him her feelings of love and loss. So, it is no surprise that, upon perceiving this, Jason compassionately chimed right in, to remind his beloved that the ashes she was focusing on, were neither him, nor where he resides. For sure, Jason was with his wife in her struggle that day, and for sure, he heard her pleas and tried to comfort her.

Although we may have physical remains to hold, whether they be ashes, clothes or other material remnants once owned by the departed, and they provide some comfort, to have and hold for a while, there is also something very sad about having these remains, while knowing they can never replace what was lost. But we hold them nonetheless.

Lynda still holds onto Jason’s remains, that’s okay, there’s no rush. When the time is right to let go of his remains, she will know and it is only for her to say. When one is in the midst of a grief cycle, there is no such thing as just being able to move on. That would imply skipping the vitally important steps that could get one over the bridge of chaos and upheaval to one’s eventual healing. There is no moving on, there is only moving forward. And sometimes, it’s one step forward, two steps back. But nevertheless, go through the steps with grace, whatever they are for each individual, and only move to the next step when completely ready. If this step of the process is pushed too fast, the result might be adding additional emotional grief, such as guilt and regret, unnecessarily heaped on an already painful set of emotions to work through. 

 Lynda mentioned experiencing a tingling feeling of being touched while she worked in her garage and basement. This was not Lynda’s imagination and is something commonly felt, if one is attuned to feeling it. When a spirit touches you, it is their actual energy field that is making contact with yours. When this happens, there is no mistaking it, as it is strong enough to get your attention. It could feel like a bug is on your skin, that you may try to brush away, yet, there is no bug in sight. The spirit touch has the sensation of a soft energetic electrical field, hence the tingling. You can even stare at it while it is happening and see nothing, but the feeling of this amazing contact of warmth and love is definitely prominent. This type of spirit touch is to inform you that your loved one is with you. 

For a few days, while I was corresponding with Lynda about some of the details of her post, she informed me that, after all this time being reluctant about spreading Jason’s ashes, just yesterday morning, she started to get the strong feeling that she would be able to do it soon. Her intuition showed her a particular time and place and the people who would be gathered. As it would happen, family will be in town at such a time. If Lynda is indeed ready at this time, it would be a great time, for those who love him, to celebrate the life and afterlife of Jason. If she’s not ready yet… then, she can always change her mind.

Hmm, though, it does seem that Jason could be involved with this inspired thought, and prompting Lynda. I’m certain of this, because… also in our correspondence, I was telling Lynda that when I work on a post, I am so focused on that departed loved one, Jason, in this case, that many times, they will show up in some way, shape or form, by giving me a direct empathic experience, an insight of understanding or even direct messages channeled through me for the bereaved.

So… later, when I wrote about the part where Jason repeatedly told Lynda in her head, “The ashes are not ME”… surprisingly it happened. A message in the form of a Valentine’s Day poem from Jason came through my mind and hands as I typed it out. As it turns out… Jason is a poet. For Lynda, he writes…

“I am not my ashes, they are no longer me.
I am much more now, than I could ever be.
I’m not confined to places, as I am all around.
But, always in your heart, dear, is where I can be found.”

One of life’s greatest miracles is that it is possible for us to eventually and completely heal from the deepest devastating pain that can so brutally upended our lives. It’s miraculous that we can move forward from our losses with our love for each other, intact; Lynda on the physical side, Jason on the spiritual. They still continue to have the bond of love for each other, as death has not upended that.

And although the remains of our departed are important for a time, the greater version of them is boundless and can never die. In this world of short-term pain and tears from our losses, it is the long-term view of hope and strength that will take us through to the rest of our lives, until through tears of joy, our love will reunite us once again.


Heart Image:Pixabay

Transforming Tragedy

Good and bad things happen in this dualistic world. Having an enlightened perspective can make all the difference in healing the wounds from these nightmares.

Bridgette writes:
“Both of my children were bi-racial. But this had nothing to do with their murders, it just made it difficult in their lives, as well as mine. I met their dad in High School when I was 15. At 16, I became pregnant with Tim and my parents sent me to a Catholic maternity home in New Orleans, when I was 4 months pregnant. They literally dropped me off. I was there through all the holidays and had no communication with them whatsoever. It was already decided for me, that I would give my baby up for adoption.”

“I can’t remember when my due date was, but the doctor said the baby was so big that he needed to induce labor and perform a c-section. At that time, I decided to call my parents to tell them that I would be keeping my baby. I was told I couldn’t come home if I kept that ‘nigger’ baby.” Continue reading

Spiritual Guidance

In this after-death communication, Bonnie receives validation that her departed father watches over his family… even still.

Bonnie writes:
“I believe in life after death 100%. My dad once gave me a message in my dream to bail my son, Robert, out of jail who was in lockup for driving without a license. And sure enough… when I woke up, there was a message saying to come & bail my son out from Fairfax County lockup. This message was left two o’clock in the morning when I was asleep. My dad was very close to my son and me. Our parents watch over us.”

Commentary- Our departed loved ones watch over us from beyond, even when we think they might be doing something else. Their love, care and concern for us does not diminish, even if we think they are far removed from us. This is clear from Bonnie’s example. Continue reading

Life’s Unusual Circumstances

When Elisa and Nancy separately make investments in the same stock, at around the same time, Elisa suspects that Eric is guiding them from beyond.

Elisa writes:
“I dreamt of Eric last night, after so long. It was in an office setting, but not my old office. When I arrived, I saw that he was in his office and I went to mine, waiting for him to call, as I saw that he was busy writing. But he looked at me and his face was so clear and vivid.”

“Then, he came to my office, kissed my head and left.” Continue reading

Bridgette’s Orbs

From her video camera, Bridgette catches this amazing show of orbs in her home. Look at the many sizes and watch how they move in unpredictable directions. 

Commentary- Bridgette has a knack for capturing orbs on video. Many times, it is her dogs that alert her that something other-worldly is present, then she runs the video cam. Sometimes she just runs the video cam, like in this example, to see what she can see. This time, she hit the jackpot. There are many different sized orbs, in varying colors, and moving at will in the direction of their choosing. Very interesting. Continue reading

Flies Are People Too!

On the anniversary of her birthday, a departed Grandma visits her surprised but delighted family in this after-death communication, in a very unusual way.

Donna writes:
“Recently, my son took his little sister and girlfriend to my mom’s grave – it was her birthday. I had to take my other son to the doctor, which took longer than expected, so I couldn’t get to the cemetery. As they were ready to leave the cemetery, my daughter started to cry for her grandma. Then, all of the sudden, a big fly landed on Grandma’s headstone and just sat there! My son started talking to it as it was my mom! They were able to touch it and it didn’t fly away.” Continue reading

The Consolation From Loss

On the day of Michel’s memorial of spreading his ashes in the forest in France, Joanna wonders how her beloved husband would give her a sign.

Joanna writes:
“We had just finished spreading Michel’s ashes in the woods at the same tree in France where Michel’s brothers ashes are. I had been asking for a sign from Michel that day but had no idea what he could scare up in the middle of the forest. But he delivered!” Continue reading

Dustin’s Batting a Thousand

Dustin’s ‘batting a thousand’ in the after-death communication and sign department, as he makes those he regularly visits smile. 

Pat writes:
“Dustin showed up the other day. I have been taking my neighbor, Lori, to see her hubby everyday at a rehab place. I have made friends with some of the residents there. I was looking for a hat to give Stevie, a 33-year-old man in a wheel chair who can’t talk or write. For some reason we have become friends and he follows me around like at puppy dog.”

“Anyways, I went through all of Dustin’s hat’s looking for a red baseball hat…the Red Sox. I Did not find one, so was looking for a green Celtic hat that I knew he had. It just was not around. So, I put a navy Red Sox hat on a shelf to take the next day. When I got up the next morning, there was the green Celtic hat on the shelf and the Red Sox was on the floor. It was NOT there the night before! So I asked Dustin…do you want me to give Stevie the green one? Is that what you are telling me? I took both hats to the nursing home. And yep…Stevie picked the green one.” Continue reading

Heavenly Signs

When Liz gets an after-death communication from her father to reveal his presence, she usually sees it in the sky.

Cross in the sky

Cross in the sky

Liz writes:
“My partner and I were on holiday. On our last afternoon we were having a few drinks in a pub and when I looked into the sky, I saw a cloud formation in the shape of a cross. To be perfectly honest, I was thinking nothing profound. Although I do spend a lot of time thinking about my Dad, and talking to God, at this moment we were just sitting there.”

“But this time, I was quick enough to take a picture, unlike the last time. My partner saw it too, unlike the last time. I believe it was something, but why, who, what?” Continue reading

Angels of Heaven and Earth

When Amy looks at her childhood Bible, after 40 years, she realizes that one of her deceased ‘Air Force Dads’ has watched over her for years.

Amy writes:



“Last Memorial Day weekend, I had been thinking about all of my Air Force Dads, including my own Dad. In military life, you make fast friends and everyone is close. Several of the men that my dad flew with are like second fathers to me.”

“Captain Carl Hunt was on my mind that weekend. I had been thinking of him as the day approached. Carl died before I ever met him. He died in a training accident in 1959 when a Canadian F-102 collided with the B47 he was in.” Continue reading

Eclipsing Life

As the moon passed over the sun in August’s eclipse, my cousin, Craig, peacefully eclipsed this life.

Throughout his adult life, my cousin, Craig, had his share of health issues, stemming from Cancer, to Lyme’s disease, to Multiple Sclerosis. Being a Scientist, whether it was a macrobiotic diet or something else he tried, he always found ways to either heal, or at least keep these diseases at bay. But, later on in his life, Craig came to experience complications from some of these debilitating diseases that left him struggling and unable to overcome.

It was February of 2017 when things took a turn for the worse. Craig came down with an infection that he couldn’t shake. The writing was on the wall. His loved ones knew his inevitable passing was closing in on both, him and them. Continue reading

Death… Our Greatest Adventure Yet!

Although 80 miles away, Jo experiences the final moments of her father’s transition from life to death in an extraordinary send off.

Jo writes: “On the night of 29 September 2013, I was asleep in my bed in north London (England), and my father was over 80 miles distant, in a dementia nursing home on the south coast.  I was jolted awake at around 1:30am, and sat up in the darkness.  A tremendous, intense, unworldly, rushing energy had filled the room.  I couldn’t see it, but I could sense it, and it was ‘sparkling’.  “Dad!” I exclaimed.  I knew it was him.  And I knew that he was dying, and that had come to me to help him push over.  And somehow I knew what he needed, and what I had to do.  I concentrated all my energy, and wished him all the peace and love and energy that I had in me – and forgiveness – and it felt both personal and universal.  I do not know how long this went on for as time stood still.  And then I lay back down and I looked through the portal in the back of my eyes* and I saw a vision of the light – that clichéd image – a giant door-shaped hole in the darkness, and silhouetted against it were countless figures, outlined by the light, all slowly streaming toward it.  And I felt very great peace, and I drifted from this vision back into sleep.” Continue reading

Shedding a Tear

As Shenique and her son say goodbye to their beloved husband and father at his viewing, he says goodbye back to them in the most unexpected way.

Shenique writes:
“Have you ever heard of a dead man crying for real? Well, it has been 8 years since my husband was killed. At his viewing, when my son and I said our last goodbyes, a tear came from my husband’s left eye. It was clear as day! Would you happen to know the meaning or what he was telling us?”

Commentary- Although it would seem unusual for a tear to fall from a departed loved one’s eye, stranger things have happened. The tear drop is a symbol of emotional expression. In this case, some messages of expression could be, “I’m sad my life ended so soon.” “This wasn’t supposed to happen this way.”  “I’m sorry you will have to go through the pain of this.” “I’m Sorry to Leave You.” “I’ll miss you and the life we had together, dearly.” and ” Goodbye for now.” Continue reading

Music As a Medium

Music is a common message medium from beyond. As Kathy looks for a sign, she receives these after-death transmissions from her beloved husband, Rich.

Kathy writes:
“In October of 2016 I was taking a class offered by Jade on “Becoming Your Own Medium”. The course was on a Friday night via conference call. I was sitting in bed with candles, phone, and ready for the class call. I remember one of the class participants saying that once in awhile she would ask for a sign from her loved one. So I thought, why not, and asked Rich, my deceased husband, to join us, as I had not received a sign in awhile. I fell asleep during the end of the class hypnosis.” Continue reading

Feathers From Our Angels

Three different women each receive the sign of a feather from the angel they love, who loves them too, and is watching over them from beyond. 

Sanjita writes:

Sanjita's Feather

Sanjita’s Feather

“Early on one Sunday morning, I found a little feather where I take shower everyday. It looks so awkward for the feather to be there because I live alone in my house. Secondly, the bathroom doesn’t have a window. Thirdly, the bathroom door is always closed after I use it and this is my first time seeing a little feather sticking on the bathroom wall.”

“The day before this happened, I was thinking about and talking to my departed best friend, Sadgunnan, because for so long there was no contact. I got busy with life and also, was traveling. As I spoke, I told him that I’m not sure where he is. Deep in my heart I was thinking if there is another moment, I wish I can see him or be with him just for a little while. I knew I was missing him and I told him to show me some signs that if he’s still around me. Usually he will come in my dreams, but to my surprise I saw a tiny feather at the bathroom the next morning. It’s impossible for any birds to fly in because there is no window in the bathroom.”