Death From a Scientific Perspective

An interesting scientific article, about the death of a loved one, offers a surprisingly encouraging and comforting perspective about afterlife existence.

Several years ago while grieving the loss of her husband, Jason, Lynda stumbled upon this NPR interview. She found it extremely comforting in a very fundamental way. Recently, Lynda shared this article with me. I found it so clear and amazing that I wanted to share it forward to those it might help to show that, in some ways, science and faith can interface in the best of ways. Hopefully, this interview will somehow assist in the comfort and healing of your loss.

Source:  NPR All Things Considered- 2015.
Host, Michele Norris and Guest, Commentator- Aaron Freeman, have the following conversation.

MICHELE NORRIS, host: Introduction of her guest:
“Commentator Aaron Freeman isn’t a person who does much planning ahead. However, if you like to look ahead to the future, he has some advice for you, advice on planning your funeral.”
AARON FREEMAN, guest:
“You want a physicist to speak at your funeral. You want the physicist to talk to your grieving family about the conservation of energy, so they will understand that your energy has not died. You want the physicist to remind your sobbing mother about the first law of thermodynamics; that no energy gets created in the universe, and none is destroyed. You want your mother to know that all your energy, every vibration, every Btu of heat, every wave of every particle that was her beloved child remains with her in this world. You want the physicist to tell your weeping father that amid energies of the cosmos, you gave as good as you got.”

“And at one point you’d hope that the physicist would step down from the pulpit and walk to your brokenhearted spouse there in the pew and tell him that all the photons that ever bounced off your face, all the particles whose paths were interrupted by your smile, by the touch of your hair, hundreds of trillions of particles, have raced off like children, their ways forever changed by you. And as your widow rocks in the arms of a loving family, may the physicist let her know that all the photons that bounced from you were gathered in the particle detectors that are her eyes, that those photons created within her constellations of electromagnetically charged neurons whose energy will go on forever.”

“And the physicist will remind the congregation of how much of all our energy is given off as heat. There may be a few fanning themselves with their programs as he says it. And he will tell them that the warmth that flowed through you in life is still here, still part of all that we are, even as we who mourn continue the heat of our own lives.”

“And you’ll want the physicist to explain to those who loved you that they need not have faith; indeed, they should not have faith. Let them know that they can measure, that scientists have measured precisely the conservation of energy and found it accurate, verifiable and consistent across space and time. You can hope your family will examine the evidence and satisfy themselves that the science is sound and that they’ll be comforted to know your energy’s still around. According to the law of the conservation of energy, not a bit of you is gone; you’re just less orderly. Amen.”

Commentary- When I think of science in general, I think of sterile environments, serious people in white lab coats and protective gloves and eyewear. When I think of physics, I think of mathematical formulas and the mechanics of matter and energy and remember that I was never great at math. Having lumped my sciences together, I imagined laboratory/clinical testing that is rather cold and impersonal. The process of hypothesis, evidence gathering, testing, measuring and observing, in an effort of proving a scientific theory, seemed stark and unfriendly to me. 

So for me, having personally experienced before, how very deep and devastating the grief of losing a loved one goes, I found this article’s perspective to be interesting and unusually reassuring in every way possible. I also found myself realizing that, on some level, my version of hard cold science and warm and fuzzy faith could possibly be describing some of the same things, just from different perspectives. Or… at the very least, they, in each of their viewpoints, form a simple foundation for science and faith to share in exploring existential questions of life, death and afterlife. The subject of matter and energy? Definitely more interesting to me now.

When confronted with a death of a loved one. By far, the deepest concern, even among people of faith, is whether their departed loved one still exist after their death. I mean, it’s natural that this question would begin to creep in. It’s a different world now. To go from being accustomed to experiencing our loved one with our usual physical senses for so long in the physical realm and then, suddenly, they are gone- no more to be seen, heard, felt or experienced in that same way is jarring. Without an after-death sign anywhere is sight, this might make one wonder about things that were previously just accepted and taken for granted.

It’s mind boggling to suddenly be forced to experience a departed loved one in a much different way, such as a spirit or an energy field… the subtle form of who they once were. In those who are abruptly thrust into facing such an existential crisis as a death, the survivors are forced into finding a deeper understanding and meaning for themselves. Of course, there are always some painfully nagging questions I  am asked about. Here are some of them-

  • I know what I’ve been taught, but does my loved one still exist? Really?
  • Is my departed loved one around me now?
  • Does my departed loved one remember me now? Care for me? Love me still? Am I important enough to be remembered?
  • Does my departed loved one know how I feel and what I’m thinking? I wish they knew. I wish I could tell them.
  • Can/will my departed loved one visit me at times or send signs for me?
  • Will my departed loved one guide my path and protect me throughout the days of my life?
  • Is my departed loved one happy and free?
  • Does my departed loved one want me to be happy and free?
  • Can my grief ever be healed? Will I ever smile again?
  • Will my departed loved one be there when I need them the most?

By the way, for anyone who might wonder about some of these same questions as well, my knowledge and experience informs me that the answer to all of these questions is yes, Absolutely.

So, where can science and faith possibly meet? Energy is the foundation we can build upon.

“The first law of thermodynamics, also known as Law of Conservation of Energy, states that energy can neither be created nor destroyed; energy can only be transferred or changed from one form to another. … In other words, energy cannot be created or destroyed.” What this means is that everything has always existed and can never not exist. It’s just that it can existed in one form or another.

The end is not really the end. There is no end. Even science, The Law of Conservation of Energy agrees. Not one bit of you (the foundational part of you) is gone. Like water, ice and condensation is the same just a different consistency, the form is another form now. Physical is now subtle energy. And, at some point, that can change form, too.

We are still together. Although we can’t explain exactly what that looks like, because we can’t comprehend that far outside of what our brains can think, we are made from the same energy fabric, always and forever. How could we not be together- always and forever? 

“You need not have faith; indeed, you should not have faith.” Because science knows what we’ve previously just had faith about. “They can measure, that scientists have measured precisely the conservation of energy and found it accurate, verifiable and consistent across space and time. You can hope your family will examine the evidence and satisfy themselves that the science is sound and that they’ll be comforted to know your energy’s still around. According to the law of the conservation of energy, not a bit of you is gone; you’re just less orderly. Amen.”

In other words, a departed loved one may not have a physical body at this time, but it doesn’t mean they no longer exist. They are just subtle energy now. It’s all energy though. We are all nothing but energy. We are one, together, always and forever.

They are a part of you, too. Even now, you influence them and they influence you. Energetically, they might even visit or give you a sign of their continued existence. They are still here, warming the way for us, through us and being our light as we wade through a chaotic world. Yet, with all these possibilities, many times, the saddest part of us falls prey to the belief that our departed loved one is far from us. Out there. Over there, somewhere… as if there were such a thing. What if they are over here, with us, within us, always and forever. What if that was not just a belief but an absolute knowing, instead? Without a sure knowledge, why would we choose to have the sad belief over the comforting one?

The author writes about what to tell the grieving widow, “All the photons that bounced from you (deceased husband) were gathered in the particle detectors that are her eyes, that those photons created within her constellations of electromagnetically charged neurons whose energy will go on forever.”

There is a lasting impression left on each of us, by us. In the physical realm, and in an energetic way, we recognize and bear witness of one another and our experiences, always to be remembered. And even… until the point at which we may be re-membered to each other- in another form. How exciting it is that we have the possibility of being together, forever with our beloved ones while we experience them in different ways.

A Physicist many not say it like this, like a person of faith would, that the distillation of a departed person’s energy is also known as spirit, and some might, but to me, what both are saying is basically the same thing. One is stated from more of a clinical and impersonal perspective, while the other explanation of faith may occur as a more warm, fuzzy, personally meaningful way. What if both ways of discovery were legitimate? And not, one perspective is valid and the other is not.

spirit: photo credit pixabay

spirit photo credit: pixabay

If we still exist in some form or another aspect of that form, what else are we without a physical shell, if we are not spirit energy? I never realized that science could be so reassuring when it came to death and an afterlife. But in allowing the perspectives of science and faith to interface, I take it as further evidence of what I’ve always known spirituality to be. Both perspectives working together can give us reassurance, comfort and hope. In the end, we never die. All is well.

energy photo credit: pixabay

energy photo credit: pixabay

 

A Thanksgiving Vibe

On this day of giving thanks, Kim experienced some extra special Thanksgiving vibes which made her very grateful.

Georgie

Georgie

Kim writes:
“Jade! Something odd happened today. I was sitting in the living room with my dog, Georgie, on the footstool in front of me. We were watching the Thanksgiving Day parade. Feeling horrifically sad, I was crying hard. I was thinking of my husband, Terry, of course, my first holiday without him.”

“In my hand, I had this necklace that was made a long time ago. Back then, when I asked Terry to give me a phrase to have printed on it, the phrase he gave me was: “You are my world and my eternity.” I don’t usually wear jewelry, but for some reason, on this day, I wanted to feel Terry’s words close to me.”

“Now, for the odd happening. I was squeezing this pendant in my hand, holding the message part of the pendant between my thumb and index finger. I leaned over and pressed it into Georgie’s shoulder as I was hugging her. I was thinking of Terry and wanted him to know how much Georgie and I miss him.”

“At that very moment I pressed the pendant into Georgie’s fur, the pendant started wildly vibrating! Concerned, I immediately jumped back and pulled it off Georgie, thinking that it was static electricity? I was worried that Georgie may have been a bit shocked. However, she didn’t flinch a muscle as she was sleeping and even, snoring, so no, that wasn’t the case. The moment I pulled back, the vibration stopped.”

Terry

Terry

“To “test it” once more, I pressed the pendant onto Georgie’s shoulder again, as I had before, but nothing happened. But here’s the thing. I not only felt the pendant vibrating, when I pulled back to look at it, I could plainly SEE it wildly vibrating like crazy, too!”

“After I experienced all of this, and realized it wasn’t a static electricity shock, I KNEW it must have been Terry telling me he was here! I didn’t cry very much after that.”

 

Commentary- The use of energy fields are how departed loved ones attempt communication with those still in the physical realm.

On the face of it, one might wonder how on Earth non-physical beings could have anything to do with interfacing with physical beings. I mean, it’s not like they are the same anymore, are they? And, it seems like now, with them out of sight, they are so far away from us that they are not a part of our lives. Well… the common denominator is that everything that exists is made of energy- both physical beings as well as non-physical beings. Both things seen and unseen. So, bottom line… yes, fundamentally, they are exactly the same as us, as every thing is energy first. And also… energy is everywhere, even in our daily lives.

We hear energy as sound, we see energy as light, we feel energy as heat, and when we are in motion, we produce energy that comes from, hopefully, the nutritious food energy we put in our bodies for sustenance. In a more primitive setting though, upon death, a physical body would break down to become one with the Earth. The decomposing body would supply energy to feed the Earth for a time, as well as other organisms receiving the energy thereof.

However, the energy of the once physical but decaying unpreserved body is not the end of the story. The spiritual energy that sheds its body below, rises to continue life above and beyond its Earthy vehicle. So, yes, basically both ways of looking at conservation of energy, physical and spiritual, can be true at the same time. Another way to say this is that everything is energy. Every thing.

According to Albert Einstein, “Energy cannot be created or destroyed, it can only be changed from one form to another.” In other words… We are all in this together, forever!

In many after-death communications, we experience our loved one’s energy getting our attention through electrical disturbances; tv or music suddenly turning on/off, the uncanny physical feeling of being touched or hugged by someone unseen and hearing the inexplicable clear voice of the familiar departed loved one. Some experience sudden and unexplained temperature changes, seeing light flashes or any kind of unusual visual anomalies and even seeing departed loved ones or smelling a sudden scent that fills the space reminding us of our special one who has long crossed over. These are a few examples of the many ways our beloved ones use energy to tell us that they exist and there is life after death- a continued life, a promising forever in which we will all exist together again. Our loved ones find many ways in which to reassure us, if we are paying attention, hoping to blot away some of our tears and replace them with the hope and confidence for us to move forward. 

Then, there is always the unexplained wild and crazy buzzing of vibration. An afterlife favorite! But it’s really all about vibration. When I talk about vibes, it is this that I refer to- every thing is expressed through vibrational energy, whether we are consciously or unconsciously aware of it, it is so. Just think of all we are not aware of! If thinking about that doesn’t make you wonder enough to begin to blow your mind, I don’t know what would, because it’s pretty much… everything… and begins to make sense by answering the questions to our deepest fears.

So, back to Kim, Georgie and Terry. Kim’s intention was strong that Thanksgiving. Strong enough that she happened to have that physical pendant in her hand- even though she didn’t know exactly why on that day in particular, rather than another day. This definitely, along with her intense heartfelt message to her beloved, somehow created an access through which Terry could easily and powerfully respond in kind.

But, Kim didn’t just feel the buzzing vibration, she saw it wildly moving, too. Lot’s of energy producing movement and even if it was just for an instant, it made a huge difference in her world. That was no imagination or wishful thinking that day. Instead, as Kim was expressing her and Georgie’s energetic message to Terry, he expressed an energetic message back to them. How absolutely beautiful.

Our loved ones are always with us. Believe this until you know it.

Several days later, after I received Kim’s 2020 Thanksgiving experience and was working on the commentary for this post, I checked in with Kim to clarify some things about her experience. Kim shared a recovered memory from decades earlier involving her departed mother that seemed similar to the one she experienced recently with Terry. So with permission, I share it here.

Kim writes: 
“When my Mom died, I was getting ready for her funeral. I had a chosen pair of black slacks that were hanging on an over-the-closet-door thingie.”

“I was looking at the slacks, thinking maybe I should wear a skirt? All of a sudden the pants on the hanger started shaking like crazy! I took it as a sign my Mom wanted me to wear the slacks! I told Terry about this at the time. He didn’t say much. So long ago now… 20 plus years ago. But… maybe he remembered and used the same sign for me?”

To that I add… Why not? 

And, it is also possible that through Kim’s remembering of the old story of her mother choosing the clothes that she should wear to the funeral, that it’s her mom now chiming in as if to say, “See? It really was me back then! And here I am now to help you to understand your recent experience.”  Like I said, vibration is an afterlife favorite.

Please know that our loved one’s energy is always with us in more ways than we can ever begin to understand or comprehend. Whether we are consciously or unconsciously aware… their energy is around us. And… remember, that it’s all of the time, too. Could love do anything else?

Georgie sleeping peacefully by the Fire. She already knows all this.

Georgie sleeping peacefully by the Fire. She already knows all this.

The Spiritual Magic of Engagement

On the five year anniversary of Marcus’s passing, Karen gets a delightful surprise visit from her love, as she visits his memorial tree.

The Path

On October 11, 2020, Karen wrote:
“Five years ago today, my love, Marcus, lost his earthly life to depression/suicide. On this day, I planned a trip to the memorial tree that I chose for him years ago. It had been almost a year since I visited our tree where I left a painted rock for him- so many years ago. I actually contemplated not going, using the cold wind as an excuse- and knowing he can feel my love from anywhere.”

“This year, I made a special ornament with a poem on it to leave for him, so I decided to go to the path to where I thought the tree was. To my disappointment, I realized that it had been so long, that I had forgotten which tree it was that I left the original memorial rock. I walked around and found another tree, this time, a pine tree that I named our “Christmas tree”. I told my love that I would make this our new tree since I forgot where the original one was. I hung the ornament and talked to him for a while.”

“As I left the tree and started walking down the path, my eye caught a yellow painted rock hidden in a tree trunk. I laughed and wanted it to be a sign from my love, but it didn’t resonate as anything other than amusing, and I almost kept walking.”

Yellow rock

Bug-like rock with eyes

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

“Be Engaged”

“However, my eyes noticed another painted rock in the tree with a message that said, “be engaged.” I thought it was a cool message and wanted it to be a sign for me, but the message didn’t really resonate either.”

 

 

 

 

Original Rock

“Next, I looked down and noticed blue colored leaves that stood out. Curious about it, I looked further and found the original stone that I painted for Marcus and left a few years earlier. That is when I knew this was our tree!”

 

 

 

 

“Then, low and behold, if that was not enough, I saw a red rock under the leaves close by. I pulled it out. It was a brightly painted red rock with eyes on it. When I turned it over, the message for me said, “u are loved.”

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Wow! Talk about a sign! I could feel my love laughing and rejoicing that I found his sign- as I almost did not!! What an amazing day! I felt so blessed and wanted to share with everyone that this is proof- after 5 years. A lot has changed in my life- but love never dies- and they never leave us!!”

Commentary- If we take a close look at the chronological happenings of Karen’s experience, a pattern begins to form in which an important lesson comes into view.

  1. Completely unaware of somehow passing, and unable to find Marcus’s original memorial tree ahead, Karen finds another tree to rename as their new tree. But interestingly enough, on her way back, Karen notices a curious yellow spotted bug-like rock with eyes. Obviously, this is a sign that means “to look and see.” Although Karen wanted it to be a sign, this rock didn’t seem to resonate. In thinking that a sign or message is unrelated to us, how many times has that happened to us all?
  2. Next, Karen literally sees the sign that says, “Be Engaged.” Again, although nice, Karen brushed it off as not applicable to her. Again. Thinking that a sign or message is “nice” but is unrelated to us, how many times has that happened to all of us? A lot of the time.
  3. It was at that time that the strange appearance of bluish leaves caught her eye that she found the original rock that made her realize the this was their tree! It was only after the strange blue leaves that she started to really tune in. Karen became engaged at a higher level and was now available for some spiritual magic. (To clarify, when I talk about spiritual magic, I’m not referring to anything negative or occult-like. When I talk about spiritual magic, I mean something heavenly and extraordinary, that it rarely occurs in everyday life).
  4. Now, Marcus had her attention! But what was he trying to say? While bent over, Karen noticed the red rock with big eyes as if to see and say to her, “Are you engaged now? Look and see my signs and message.”
  5. In turning the rock over on the five year anniversary of Marcus’s passing/transition, Karen knew everything she could ever want to know from Marcus. That in her remembering of Marcus and their love on that very special day, she too, was remembered and loved by Marcus, as well. 

The definition of “engage” means to be interested in, involved in and that there is something to pay attention to. Although at first, each sign upon Karen’s path seemed to be unrelated, all the signs were clearly trying to get her attention and hoping beyond hope that she would not miss the prize. When she finally found it, it was all too clear from Marcus’s proud and joyful laughter, that his message was successfully delivered to his love on that special day. 

But, Karen came close to missing this. If it weren’t for the strange blue leaves, she might have left disappointed that her love was silent on that day. She might have become insecure- cried and doubted, too. She might have gone home and wondered if Marcus is still around and if he still cares about her after these five years. (By the way, our loved ones are around, and do care about us always).

However, all too often, signs are right in front of us. Without the magic of engagement and that spark of curiosity contained therein, those same signs might be over-looked. Instead of recognizing them, these special signs are wasted on us as easily dismissed… or perhaps just chalked up to wishful thinking. With this way of thinking, we miss so much of the beauty of spiritual magic that exists right in our path and just beyond our vision. In missing it, we miss the prize, too.

As humans, consumed with our daily lives, you can see how easy it is to become disengaged to any spiritual magic. As we dwell on this physical plane, with so much going on, it takes a lot of energy to generate presence in each moment. Engagement is not so much a thing we do, as a way of being. It requires our focus and attention. When we lose the wonder and awareness of our inner child, we trade them in for practicality. Worst case scenario is that our faith wanes and we become apathetic and resigned. The danger in this is, we risk missing the very thing that would make our heart sing and bring us the new-found life that was so apparent in Karen’s experience. She was so impacted by her magical encounter with Marcus that she literally wanted to shout it to the world! And, so she did!.

As in Karen’s case, it was only after experiencing some small, and seemingly unrelated things, that she was able tune in to see the bigger picture that was so beautifully laid out before her.  Though, seeing the larger picture is rarely possible if we are not engaged in the first place. If we practice becoming more fully engaged, that also means aware, involved and interested in, we become available to spiritual magic. However, like the open, believing and faithful child of wonder we once were, this is no longer automatic for us. As children growing to adulthood, this is something we have learned to forget. And now, as adults, this is something we must learn to rediscover, practice and apply in our daily lives if we are to have access to those spiritual treasures.

Karen got an awesome experience from Marcus. She wasn’t expecting it, but it happened just the same. And, sometimes it happens, sometimes it doesn’t. But, being engaged is a good place to start. Keep the faith. As the spiritual world seeks our attention and engagement, and wants us to look and listen, their message is to convey to us that we are not alone and we are so loved. Through the many millions of after-death communications from beyond, some of which are our own, we know this is a fact. So, let us not casually look on in obliviousness, for the next sign we will never see. When we are engaged in the spiritual magic on our life’s path, that’s when spiritual magic happens.

Knowing, The Four Eyes of Awareness

As I was writing the commentary to one of Kim’s last posts, she remembered an important detail about “knowing” that bears repeating and explanation.

Kim writes:
“After my Mom passed and Terry had the out-of-body experience to visit to her, he often told me, that time, for the people in Heaven, goes by in the blink of an eye. I didn’t and still don’t know why he thought this or how he knew this. However, he mentioned it quite often when we would be talking about my Mom and also when we’d be talking of his inevitable end of life coming soon. Meaning… I guess that he wouldn’t have long to wait for me to join him?”

“He was just sure that time in Heaven and time here are totally different. He also told me that he and I (and our loved ones… and even our beloved dogs!) would be together for eternity. He was certain of it.”

“I was always curious as to how/why he was so certain of this. I am guessing that he may have been more “intuitive” than I realized. And, that he simply didn’t tell me everything he experienced?”

In any event… I hope he’s right.”

Commentary- “Knowing” is definitely a thing. It’s also a difficult thing to articulate. I mean, how could you know something with such certainty, without having any recollection of where this knowledge came from in the first place? How is it suddenly just there when it wasn’t before?

Indeed, it may sound illogical, and maybe even irrational to some, but the result is still… that you know this particular something… and you still don’t know how you know it. Or… at the very least, you can’t remember how you know it. Therein lies the clue.

The particular “knowing” of something is just immediately present, as if you already had an experience that you can’t quite remember, and are left with the experience’s lasting residue. This “knowing” could come instantaneously without warning, as it often does. It could even come over time and then suddenly, you become aware that it’s been there all along.

This “knowing” comes in the form of the Four Eyes of Awareness – insight, intuition, information or instruction. It may or may not have been something already on your mind. But, like “knowing” often does, the form it takes seems to magically appear as it is incorporated immediately into your thought stream to live as truth. 

These Four Eyes of Awareness have everything to do with spiritual sight, or seeing something that was previously hidden, before you were made spiritually aware. Or, in other words, a revelation. Although the following words I use as examples, all start with the letter I, I say Eyes instead, because each one really represent a different spiritual perception used by our spiritual eyes.

Here are some very common examples of this.

  • Insight- Have you ever woken up and just known that you were with your departed loved one, but couldn’t remember a thing? You just knew. It’s like you still felt their lingering presence around you. Or have you ever had a dream you can’t recall but you get a general knowledge of the contents and what it means.
  • Instruction- Have you ever been tangled up in an emotional/mental mess, only to have a brilliant moment of clarity, long enough, to see your way free from the mess that seemed impossible? Now, suddenly, there is a way through and you know exactly what to do.
  • Intuition- Have you ever had a strong “feeling” about something that turned out to be true, after the fact? Intuition is a form of knowing similar to premonition. Many times, these two forms of spiritual knowledge prepare us in advance of something that is to be.
  • Information- Have you ever had a near-death, out-of-body, shared-death or after-death experience that was so profound that you came back into this realm with previously unknown knowledge? You may find memories, so real, from another existence surfacing that begin to put important puzzle pieces together about your life, mission and purpose. It happens when one is ready for, and is welcoming of spiritual awareness.

Terry’s experiences were great examples of how one can “know” something. Whether Terry was outright taught these things on his spiritual journeys or whether he came back and was downloaded with the knowledge later, it is all the same. He had the knowledge at a much deeper level than he could receive from the human’s brain perspective. He received the knowledge at a soul level, which often leaves the surface self to wonder about what it can barely comprehend. These spiritual experiences are an important clue and reminder that we are spiritual beings, first, and human beings, second. What would it take to have a sure knowledge about that? 

So, yes, Kim. Terry knew however he knew, and he was right about what he knew. This life is so short, like the blink of an eye. And you, he and your puppies will all be happily reunited together once again through love.

For reference on this post, please read Kim’s other experiences- Spiritually Sensitive People and Other Worldly Experiences.

Spiritual Awareness

Spiritual Awareness

Spiritually Sensitive People

Why are some people more susceptible to being an access point for spiritual experiences rather than others? Here is something to consider.

In my last post, Other Worldly Experiences, Kim shared her husband, Terry’s, experience that left him fearless of death. Although it was many years ago, it gave him reassurance that death and the afterlife is nothing to be afraid of. 

Terry

Kim writes:
“Weeks before my husband’s passing, Terry fell onto our tiny stair landing. He was going downstairs to go to the bathroom. I heard him fall, I sprang out of bed screaming, “TERRY, TERRY!” His head was turned at an odd, almost upside down angle. The top of his body was on the landing, his legs were still on the top of the one step. As I was screaming, he was not answering me and I thought he was dead! Finally, as I reached him to help him up, he spoke. He later told his sister that he was hovering up at the ceiling, looking down on himself!”

Commentary- Have you ever wondered why some people are more spiritually sensitive than others? This question comes up a lot… and unfortunately is paired with a lot of their frustration that they consider themself to be the non-sensitive type. Already feeling harshed up about their perceived deficit of spiritual sensitivity, the bigger the issue the non-sensitive person makes it – the more difficult being spiritually sensitive becomes. This vicious cycle of wanting and not getting, has the tendency of leaving one to feel frustrated and inadequate, furthermore, adding insult to injury. 

However, being spiritually sensitive is not about being adequate or inadequate. Consciously or unconsciously, with their consciousness, some people are just able to tap into the upper/outer edges of the vibrational frequency range more easily.

Vibrations

Vibrations

The physical realm, in which we experience our everyday lives, is made up a vibrational frequencies. Most people perceive their reality within a particular vibrational range. This range could also be referred to as a vibrational spectrum. In this context, we experience the five physical senses that are so common to everyday living. We are very familiar with them- seeing, hearing, touching, tasting and smelling.

We are told by some skeptics, that nothing exists outside this particular set of vibrational frequencies. “That’s just our life and there is nothing else.” And… if something else is experienced outside of physical explanation, that experience may be chalked up to either fringe, fantasy or insanity. Adding, “Go back to your 5-sensory cubicle, weirdo!” But… how much sense does this really make when so many people have viewed phenomena outside of the box?

Of course, those people saying this are usually the ones whose consciousnesses have never ventured outside the status quo perimeter to have a genuine spiritual experience. It is also true that these spiritual experiences are often unexplainable, when trying to convey them from a physical context of a five-physical-senses brain point of view. That’s all there is to the brain’s knowledge base, and the rest is likely perceived as either a mystery, weird or invalid.

The Law of Vibration, one of the Universal Laws, states that everything in the Universe is in motion and is made up of vibration. That means you, your thoughts and emotions, every one else, their thoughts and emotions and basically… everything. Within a human’s paradigm, we mostly have access to the range that includes the physical 5-senses range, except those rare moments when we find ourselves in higher frequencies and wonder, “What the heck just happened?”

However, if, for some reason, our ability to sense anything becomes greatly heightened, and with our consciousness, we are able to go closer to or beyond the higher frequency of the upper or outer edges of the normal physical range, we are susceptible to having a spiritual experience, allowing us to receive and be privy to spiritual information from the spiritual realm. It’s really that simple. 

There are some people who consistently experience their lives on the upper edges of the vibrational spectrum, some of us only visit periodically, and others seem to never visit at all, as they are firmly grounded in the lower ends of the physical spectrum. Usually, those people rarely have a spiritual experience, nor do they believe they exist. And then… there exists some combination of everything in between. 

However, it does seem to be true that, once you are sensitive enough to have a spiritual experience, you become more susceptible to experiencing them more often. It’s as if your consciousness shifts to allow for more. Perhaps the brain accepts the new unknown experience enough to allow it a place to reside and eventually integrate.

Terry was such a person. Being spiritually sensitive, Terry’s consciousness was, at times, able to experience a heightened degree of range.

A whole range of catalysts can create the “space” to become more spiritually sensitive. We all know that prayer, meditation, relaxation, and hypnosis can create a high vibration because of  particular brainwaves that are induced. Thoughts of empowerment, love and goodwill excel on the emotional scale. Positive thoughts, as well as dwelling in possibility are considered a high state of mind. It is understandable that hate, greed, cruelty and all other negative ways of being, affect us greatly in the opposite direction, as the vibrational frequency is very low.

Terry was also open to receiving these experiences. After experiencing the world beyond, after his mother-in-law’s passing, losing his fear of death, then seeing himself lay helpless on the stair landing after his fall, he did not have to learn that he was a spiritual being having a physical experience. He knew it already. Also, it does occur that one who is close to their death, as was Terry at the time, is more sensitive to leaving their physical body. It seems that in the process and preparation of crossing over to the next life, the spirit begins to detach itself from the metaphorical heaviness of the physical body it was grounded in for so long.  I say this because he was easily knocked from his body with his fall. On some level, the spirit knows when it’s time to return to its heavenly home. Sadly for those left behind, Terry passed just weeks later in May of 2020.

Here are some other examples of spiritually sensitive people. There are people who go into a coma, no longer grounded in their physical bodies or in the context of the five senses in which they have previously experienced their lives. Once that happens, it is possible that without the physical reminder of the body, consciousness shifts, and slowly begins to drift off into the world beyond. There are children, who have playmates that we can’t see. Fresh with youth and innocence in this world, often they don’t know they are only supposed to exist in a particular vibrational frequency until we teach them more of what we say is appropriate in the physical plane. So, they experience what they experience, and we tell them they are imagining things. Eventually, most forget they are spirit’s first, loose their sensitivity and also the biggest part of themselves- their true nature becomes hidden.

At some point in life, usually later on, some begin to awaken to a deeper part of themselves and wonder how they can be more spiritually sensitive. The first thing is about being aware that being spiritually sensitive is even possible. The second is understanding how it occurs. Having an open mind increases the chances because with it comes the awe and wonder of a child who is innocent to limits, which is such a great foundation for experiencing possibilities beyond this realm.

Anyone can bring out their inner spiritually sensitive self. When you come from the place that you are spirit first, being spiritually sensitive comes more naturally. After all, spiritual sensitivity is a huge part of your intrinsic nature.

“Other Worldly” Experiences

“Other Worldly” experiences include spiritual manifestations such as Out of Body, Shared-death and Near-death experiences. Here is an awesome one from Terry.

Terry

Terry

Kim writes:
“It’s been 26 years since my mother passed away. On the night of her passing, Terry witnessed an incredible event. My husband and I were asleep in bed and Terry sat up like a BOLT and told me of his experience. He had just been flying at an incredible speed (he felt warm and no pain from his Rheumatoid Arthritis) down a hallway with doors on either side.”

“He came to a door that was open and saw my Mother laying in bed. He said she looked younger. She had a blanket made of a material that he couldn’t describe, it was sort of glowing and sparkly, like the opal gem. He got the impression that they were preparing her for something. He said she (nor he) never actually spoke but he understood from her that she was saying, “Everything is fine, everything is fine.”

“Terry said he was angry (I think because he knew how sad I was that she had died) and that he SLAMMED his hand down on a table near her bed, which held more of that fabric that was covering her up to her neck. Suddenly, he found himself flying down that same hallway again and was SLAMMED back into our bed.”

“Terry said he saw me laying there, sleeping. So obviously, he had an out of body experience. His hand actually HURT from slamming it on that table! This was after he was back with me, the hand still hurt!  I was crying and asked why my Mother didn’t come to me like that, he said he thought that maybe she thought it would upset or scare me, so she sent the message to me, through Terry.”

“My point in telling you this is, since he had the experience with my Mom, he said he had no fear about dying, because, from his heavenly experience, he knew it was a good place to go.”

Commentary- As I read this simple yet amazing “other world” experience, I found such eye-opening, clear cut clues embedded in this account that I was excited to interpret them. These experiences are so familiar to me, so I will begin to shed some light. 

Terry described his mode of transportation as flying… at an incredible speed no less. Obviously, he was in his spirit form which was not constrained by the weight of the physical body, nor was he operating by the same laws of the physical plane. He had greater freedom of motion, even to the point of being free from his pain. A clear sign he was out of body.

On his flight, Terry flew passed many doors to the one that was open. The open door represented an invitation for him to come in. In other words, what or who he would find in there would be relevant to him in some way. The other closed doors were not his business. What comes to my mind is some sort of hospital for spirits who have recently left their bodies. Perhaps they needed extra care during their transition process.

Through the open door, Terry saw Kim’s mother who had long since passed away. She looked younger. Looking younger is a common description noted when a deceased loved one has been seen by those still in this plane of existence. Many times older people’s spirits will choose to look the way they did in the prime of their lives. There are few exceptions that I’m aware of.

Kim’s mother was resting from/for something with this mysterious blanket over her while lying on a bed. This curious blanket was made of indescribable material, meaning, “other worldly.” It was glowing and sparkly, like an opal gem. But what was its purpose? “To prepare” Terry thought. To prepare means to make ready or make someone able to deal with something. This miraculous “other world” blanket is about healing in some way. Like the hospitals in the physical realm, there are many therapies used on us to prepare/get us ready, to transition us back into our world after we have had some sort of crisis. Perhaps she was being prepared to go into a dramatically different and new plane of existence.

In my profound past life regression by Dr. Weiss, turned instead, end-of-this-life experience, The End Is Only The Beginning, I too witnessed an interesting hospital experience. I was being healed and watched over by heavenly beings on a glowing, opal like or crystalline bed, while my consciousness went through the process of coming to. In my experience, my body had already died but my consciousness had not yet realized it. This is common among people who die in their sleep or die so abruptly that they are not even aware of their death.

 Terry and Kim’s mom spoke telepathically– the language medium used on the “other side.” She indicated through her thoughts that she was in good hands and that she was not only fine, but had made it to safety. Her message in a nutshell, “There is no need to worry about me. I am good. I am still alive.”

When Terry slammed his fist on the table next to his mother-in-law’s bed, he might have thought he was in a dream. The fact that Terry’s fist still hurt when he landed back in bed is evidence to him that his experience was real. There was no doubt, with a still painful fist. And now that he was back in the physical realm where pain can be felt, you bet it hurt.

Another classic Out Of Body Experience sign is that, upon his return, Terry saw Kim sound asleep in their bed. Terry was so aware that when he landed in his body, he bounced right back up to recall his experience and give Kim’s mother’s message in living color.

People, like Terry, who have such a real and profound experience of visiting the “other side” realize that, although they don’t understand everything that happens and why, there is nothing after our death to be afraid of. We are just born into a new understanding of existence, where we are young, happy, pain-free to live on from there.

The last thing I want to add is this- it is common to feel bad when someone else gets an experience/message that you think you should have gotten. It hurts and only adds to the insecurity that arises after the death of a loved one. If this should happen to any of you reading this, please consider there was a message given on your behalf- even if it didn’t come through you. In this case, Terry happened to be the access for this message. And… thank goodness! There was a lot of information given in his “other worldly” visit and a very important message for Kim in there.

In the next post, I will use another example in regard to Terry, to show why some people may be more susceptible to being an access point for spiritual experiences rather than others.

Sadly, Terry passed away in May of 2020. Because of this experience, he had some amount of comfort because he knew that this life isn’t the end of life or our relationships. Huge hugs to Kim for sharing this and much love and comfort on her healing path.

Other Worldly

Other Worldly

Special Occasion Visitations

On the 4-year anniversary of his passing, Liz’s father reminds her that he is aware of this day, and makes his presence known to her on her laptop via Skype.

On July 14, 2020, Liz wrote:
“It’s been awhile, but I got another message today. Today is the 4th year of my Dad’s passing.”

laptop

laptop

“I came home this afternoon and turned on my laptop. It was doing an update. Once it had finished, the screen stayed black for an extremely long time, which made me wonder if something had gone wrong. Eventually, it sorted itself out and my desktop appeared, but I knew something was still going on in the background.”

“I waited, and eventually it all settled down when I notice an extra icon on my taskbar. It was Skype. I never use Skype. I put my curser on it and it said I was logged in. That was strange so I clicked on “log out” but instead of logging out, it brought Skype up.”

“When I looked at it, Billy, my partner, looked at it too, and asked, “Why are you looking at Skype?”  I told him it had started by itself. He asked me the last time I had used Skype. It was 4 years ago after my Dad passed. It was only then that I suspected a visit from my Dad.”

“We weren’t able to go back to the UK for his funeral, since he passed the day we arrived home from visiting him. My family told me not to come back, that we’d been there and seen him just days before and that we could be involved in his funeral via Skype, which we did.”

“So, I’ve come to the conclusion that this was Dad presenting himself on the very day of his passing, just four years later. I went into my update history and today’s update was a general windows 10-monthly update. There was nothing about Skype being included in it.”

Commentary- Sometimes our departed loved ones present themselves to us on special occasions such as, significant dates we once shared together, like holidays, birthdays and anniversaries. Although we normally tend to think of these special occasions as relatively happy events, after experiencing a painful loss, they are now sad, especially when the pain of a loved one’s passing is still fresh and unprocessed.

Even though we will always love and miss our departed ones, as we heal properly through the grief process, a visitation like the one Liz experienced, four years after her father’s passing, likely made her smile in awe and wonder. With the benefit of time, healing and a positive perspective, she avoided the all too common emotional breakdown of one newly affected by such loss, still reconciling and coping with the devastation it created.

Liz has had her share of visitations from her father, as well as others who have gone ahead of her. But knowing Liz the way I think I do, a long distance friend I’ve never met from another continent, who, in words and tone of emails, shares with me her experiences, I think I am safe to say that Liz handles the possibility of spiritual visitations with grace. She is open to receiving them… but does not go out to chase down these magical experiences. However badly she might want them, she allows them to come to her. And they do… whenever they do.

Some sad and frustrated grievers might wonder, “How come my departed loved one never visits me… especially on these important events that held so much meaning?” “There must be some reason. Are they mad at me? Have they forgotten me? Don’t they love me anymore? Am I doing something wrong?” “If I don’t have a visitation from them, I’m going to freak out!”

I’ve heard a variation of the above questions from concerned grievers so often and it breaks my heart. It does seem that in such a vulnerable and raw state of grief, our worst fears tend to surface. As if dealing with the loss of a loved one isn’t enough, our deepest fears (all the unknowns things of death) rear their ugly heads to further torment us by inflicting more pain. The disorientation of this new experience and what it entails, can be deeply unsettling and confusing. We just want a sign to help us feel better!

Given the fear that can come up in the face of a death, it’s easy to jump to the worst conclusions we can think of, instead of the best ones. Why is that? Why are we so quick to question the love and bonding we shared upon this Earth, and why so easily?

A positive and healthy perspective goes a long way here. Here is an example. If one comes from the perspective of scarcity, the tendency for that one will be to view/experience the world from a place of insecurity, unworthy, desperation, fear, never having enough of something, and thinking, “It”- (whatever “it” is) never happens to me. “It happens for others but not for me.” And… the one who sees the world in that way will see the world that way… and that one will be right. 

However, if one comes from the perspective of abundance, the tendency for that one will be to view/experience the world from a place of security, worthiness, patient confidence, opulent faith, grace, and thinking, “It could happen to me at any moment, just because it can. And, when it does… I’ll be there for it with an attitude of awe and wonder.” Perspective is powerful. Perspective is everything.

For sure, there is a huge difference between those perspectives. You can feel it in the energy of the words. The one with that powerful perspective generously allows into their experience, so much more.

perspective- dark and light

perspective- dark and light

You see, the experiences of our lives, live themselves out in the perceptions of our choosing, making our lives darker or lighter, heavy or more effortless. However, we are barely conscious or responsible for this. We pretend to have no choice in the matter. It’s just something that’s happening TO us.

Instead of allowing the dark side of fear and scarcity to take us down so quickly, without a fight, perhaps we can remember what really matters when the ‘rubber hits the road.’ While our loved one dwelled here physically with us on this planet, our departed loved us and bonded with us in complex ways that we could never begin to unravel. Our love is our commitment. Why would they simply forget about us now? They could not. It is fear and scarcity speaking that says they could forget you.

Even if you think your departed loved one isn’t here for you on your special occasion, our departed loved ones are here for us in whatever way they are. Trust that. We don’t always get a say in how that looks to us. And, sometimes they surprise us and we do. However, experiencing from the lens of abundance definitely helps to decrease our suffering, giving us the possibility of quicker healing too..

Give yourself some space to see from a positive and healthy lens. The hurtful questions of scarcity don’t need to be entertained. Have some faith in yourself and the love you invested in your loved one while you dwelled together on this planet. Have some faith in them, and the love they invested in you, too. Next time fear raises its ugly head to wonder about your status with your departed loved one, ask yourself this- “What would love do? What else would love do but keep on loving you?”

Abundance

Abundance

There Is No Place Like Home

In this after-death communication, Kim’s husband, Terry, hunkers down as a spirit in his home, until he’s good and ready to go to the light.

Kim writes:
“Terry, my husband of 36 years, passed away 6 weeks ago from a horrific battle with prostate/bone cancer. I cannot stop crying.”

“About 5 weeks after his passing, I had a dream that I saw him in his bedroom putting on his pajamas. There were 2 young girls that I did not know standing there. They were in their teens and had long, wavy hair that was parted in the middle. Pardon me for sounding snotty, but they were rather homely looking. They looked almost like twins. Both were wearing a sleeveless, cream colored, slip-over type dress. The material was lightweight and the girls were barefoot.”

“I was standing in the hallway of our house, right at the doorway of his bedroom. The girls were facing me, but Terry was facing the chest of drawers in front of him so I had a side view of him. It seemed as though he had gotten something out of his drawers, probably the pajamas he was putting on. The two girls stared at me, saying nothing, not smiling, they just stared at me. My husband did not look at me! I could not believe he would ignore me! If those girls “saw” me, why didn’t my husband see me?”

“The feeling I got from the girls was very ominous! As if they were telling me NOT to come near Terry! Terry never saw me. Or if he knew I was there, would not acknowledge me? I felt so very scared and hurt!”

Commentary- This dream is symbolic as well as an actual peek into an important moment for Terry. Kim’s dream tells the story of what had happened in that moment so that Kim could be privy to this knowledge and be comforted in her grief.

Although Terry had already passed 6 weeks earlier, in Kim’s dream, he was at home, doing some things he always did, one of which was to put on his pajamas.

Guardian Angel

Guardian Angel

The two barefoot girls were guardian angels. They appeared as plain in looks and dress because the emphasis was not on them, it was on Terry. Given how amazing it would be to actually see guardian angels, beautiful or even homely, elaborate or plain, Terry was to be the focal point of what Kim was to notice most. But, just an interesting note here, for whatever reason, the bare feet on a spiritual visitor is commonly an indicator of someone not of this world, but instead, the heavenly realms.

Although this experience occurred in a dream, Kim was having an out of body experience and was actually seeing a close up of the reality of the situation with her spiritual eyes.

Right at his bedroom door, Kim sees Terry, going about the day to day motions of living, in this case, one of them is putting on his pajamas as he get ready to go to sleep. He is facing away from Kim. The angels are facing toward Kim, seeming ominous so that Kim does not disrupt the process that is happening.

What was happening? Until that moment, Terry was refusing to leave his home and his wife. Feeling helpless in leaving his wife and life behind, he was hunkered down to stay, so to speak, but rapidly losing that fight with reality. In this light, we see angels who were there guarding his spirit, allowing Kim to witness what happened in the end, yet warning Kim with their minds not to interfere in the process of his imminent ascension into the light that was about to happen.

Terry with his now departed pet, Woody, now together again

Terry with his now departed pet, Woody, now together again

It does happen that spirits may try to stay where they were most comfortable, in their home and with the people they love. It wasn’t that Terry didn’t know his body had already passed. He did, but he also knew that he, as a spirit, was alive and wanted to stay. It’s okay that it happens. It works it’s way out one way or another, so there is no need to worry about this if it happens. People and spirits have free will. Either way, Terry was not ready yet and it would not happen one second before he was good and ready. This might have felt like the only control he had at the time, so he used it.

Although, it’s interesting to note that Terry was in his pajamas, which are people’s end of the day clothes. This represents that he was getting ready to slip into another level of consciousness. He knew leaving this realm was inevitable, it was just a matter of will and process, and now it was time.

It’s also common for people who have dreams in which their loved ones don’t acknowledge them, to think their loved one is mad at them for something. This is not true, it’s just a fear the griever may have. Although Terry was not aware of Kim at the time, because he was in a slightly different dimension, he was aware of his situation and that it was time to go.

Signaling a tense moment, he angels appeared ominous to keep Kim away, as it would have made things even harder for Terry to make his transition if he were actually aware of her. Terry, not looking at Kim in her dream, was never about hurting or ignoring her, it was about not trying to hurt her by sticking around as long as he could to protect and watch over her.

As I’m writing this, I’m realizing that not only is this post about an after-death communication from Terry, Kim’s out of body experience, but also, really close to a shared-death experience, that Kim was privileged to witness. A shared death experience, because she actually saw the moment before Terry ascended from the physical realm and into the light. What amazing experiences these all are and so powerful and effective to healing and knowing that the spirit does go on and on after this life.

Kim and Terry's home fire

Kim and Terry’s home fire

There is no place like home. We’ve heard that a lot, and we love our homes. Besides the physical structures that we call our home, there are the emotional and mental structures of support that we love and give us comfort, too. Kim is Terry’s home. Terry is Kim’s home. 

Kim knows Terry fought his mightiest to stay in this realm despite the pull on him to do otherwise, but in the end, Terry had to succumb to the inevitability of his spirit’s heavenly home. However, after going into the light, I’m sure it didn’t take long for Terry to realize that he wasn’t limited to just one place. Once returned to the protection of the light, and are debriefed in the knowledge of the light, it doesn’t mean our departed loved ones can’t be with us in our daily lives too. They can and do with the protection of the light of heaven. Otherwise, a soul who stays and does not go to the light is just another haunting. Remember, free will exists for people and spirits. And, I’m glad to say that Terry found his way to the light and still spends time with Kim in their home. Kim still feels Terry’s presence around their home and is greatly comforted by it. 

Heavenly home

Heavenly home

And one day, not so far away, Kim and Terry will joyfully and fully reunite, face to face, once more in their heavenly home together. But for now, home is where the heart is. And, there’s no place like home. And, there’s no one like our loved ones.

Note- Our brains are complex. But, if you can actually comprehend the simplicity of what I’m about to tell you, here is the best kept secret ever. We can never really be apart from one another- in life or in, what we call, death. We are always connected in our spiritual hearts. No, really. We are.

“Aaron Knows”

It’s noted that people with a disability have greater spiritual abilities than those who don’t. It’s clear that Aaron is connected to his departed brother.

Aaron, Dustin and their father

Aaron, Dustin and their father

Pat writes:
“On Wednesday, Feb. 26 of this year, my autistic son, Aaron, was supposed to go on a class trip to NYC on the train. He loves train rides and had been looking forward to it. For some unknown reason, that morning, he had a major meltdown on the train platform that caused the whole class to miss the train. He simply refused to get on the train.”

“A week later, the news of the virus in NYC hit the papers. When I read the story, I thought, “Dustin.” That train would have been crowded with commuters and the virus. I know it was Dustin protecting him and his classmates. There was really no other reason Aaron would suddenly have that meltdown right there and them.”

“Then, about a month later, I needed someone to help me out by taking Aaron out on some rides, down to the shore. I contacted Alexis who works for his day program to see if she would be willing, since my eyesight is not good on long drives. She loves Aaron and was happy to take him the next weekend.”

Again, Aaron refused to go. He kept saying “No Alexis, No Alexis, With mommy.” I texted her and told her he wanted to be with mommy but I could not figure out why. He loves her. Interestingly, he did ask for Alexis to take him the following weekend on May 9 and May 10. When I texted her about it, she said she could not. She was feeling ill and her partner had the virus. Turns out, days later with some testing, she had it too.”

“I counted back from when Aaron had last been with her. It was 15 days. I did get him tested plus myself and we were both negative. Thank God. That weekend he kept saying “no Alexis” would have been a week before she got sick. She would have been contagious. Somehow, he knew. Dustin was protecting him.”

“And lastly, my hubby broke his hip on Jan.17. He went from being operated on to a rehab, back to the hospital three times, and back to rehab. He is not a good patient. He discharged himself against doctors order. The day before he came home, March 26, the rehab called me to tell me they had the virus breakout there. They assured me it was not in his area. The next day, March 27, he came home by ambulance against doctor’s orders. He is still home. Can’t walk with out a walker, he uses a wheel chair, can’t climb stairs or drive. Basically, he is house bound.”

“Besides being a big pain in my rear, I know he is safe. No virus. Normally, he would be driving around doing whatever. He does not watch what he touches or wear a mask. I know he would bring the virus home to me and Aaron. Dustin knows that too. I really think this was the only way Dustin knew how to keep him safe with the rest of us.”

Commentary- I asked Pat to write about Aaron, to show why Dustin’s protection of Aaron and his family is so very clear. In this commentary that Pat has written so well, it will become more obvious, than what I could comment on, why what Alexis wrote to Pat that, “Aaron knows” is true. It’s also important to note that people with some form of disability seem to have greater abilities than that of those who don’t.

Aaron, Dustin and their father

Aaron, Dustin and their father

Pat writes:
“Aaron is severely autistic. He is 6′ 6″, 311 lbs. He has been classified mentally around age 5 or 6 years. He still believes in Santa Claus, the Easter Bunny and Sesame Street. He loves game shows and long rides in the car. He is basically non verbal but does talk in words… not complete sentences. He can read and write. He taught himself at age 2 by watching Sesame Street. When I can not understand him, he will write it down for me.”

“Aaron is very schedule prone. Everything must follow in order. He is very much like the Rain Man movie with Dustin Hoffman in it. When his schedule for the day gets interrupted, he will meltdown like a 2 year old. Aaron also will run if he sees something he likes. He is very fast. He will take off if he sees a tv in a store so that he can change the channel. He has taken off in blizzards because he wanted a Slurpee from 7 Eleven. If he needs a bathroom, he just runs. One minute he is behind you. The next he is gone. He has no fear of traffic or heights. He is very sweet basically. Like my big Baby Huey.”

“He also has a memory like none I know of. He remembers everything. Like this year, he refused to go on a trip to the Cape May Zoo. He said, “bumble bee.” Apparently, he was stung by a bee on a class trip on August 24 in 1999. He can give you dates, events and times that are important to him. Even down to the year they happened. He can also say the Alphabet backwards and knows every show on tv…what time, day and channel. He is a walking TV Guide.”

“I do remember the last day Alexis was with Aaron, she took him to her place. She went to the FaceBook wall and sent me some pics of Aaron and Dustin together that he had posted. I remember that she texted me… “Aaron Knows.”  I thought to my self… “of course he does.” He remembers Dustin and all the places they went together.”

“I wonder if those images mentioned early in this post, were a way of reminding Aaron of Dustin. It was the following weekend he refused to go out with Alexis which was so strange. I wonder if Dustin told him not to go? I think so. Aaron was adamant about not going out with her. Flat out refused. I never saw him like that before. That was the weekend she was contagious but did not know yet she had the virus.”

Dustin

Dustin

“Enter Dustin. The three of us always took day trips together. We have taken bus trips to the Bronx Zoo, NYC China Town, Philadelphia, PA Cobbler’s Village, boat rides, train rides etc. Mainly, the three of us because my hubby hates trips anywhere other than casinos. We also have gone to shows and plays. Dustin watched out for Aaron. If Aaron decided to run after something, he would grab Aaron and bring him back. He loved Aaron. In turn, Aaron would always hug him and pat his head. That is how he shows affection. It was Dustin and myself who chased him down the street in 3 feet of snow during a blizzard. Cops came, ambulance called and even then he jumped out of the ambulance. He wanted his Slurpee. No stores were open. I thank God that Dustin was always there to help.”

“When Dustin died in the car accident, Aaron seemed unaffected. He did see the obituary. He did go to the memorial. We all wondered how he would react. It was not until the first Thanksgiving without Dustin that I knew why. We went out to dinner at the same place we always did every year. This year there was three of us.The fourth chair at the table was empty. During the dinner, Aaron said “Dusty” and looked at the empty chair and then went back to eating. I knew he saw Dustin. I had a lot of signs from Dustin that evening, but this was the first time Aaron had said his name. Being childlike as Aaron is, he still sees his brother. The rest of us have been programmed into adulthood not to. He has mentioned Dusty a few times after also. I am sure Dustin is in contact with Aaron. There is no doubt about it.”

“I feel Dustin around me always. But Aaron has that special connection with his brother that only a child can have. He is extremely upset about this virus. His program is shut down, no events to go to and he is bored. I try to explain to him people die from this. We have to stay home. But how do I explain dying to someone who sees his brother and hears his brother talk to him. His brother is still here even though he died. So is that so bad?”

A Spirit’s Calling Card

Many times our departed loved ones choose a particular way in which they show up to us, that is like a unique signature, so we will recognize them when they do.

Liz writes:
I was sitting on the end of the bed in our spare room and was looking at the recordings we had on our TV in there. I felt a cool draft which got even stronger. I noticed the ceiling fan had started up all by itself. As I looked up, my partner came upstairs, thankfully to witness it along with me.

The remote control that turns it on was on the bedside table at the other end of the bed, so clearly neither of us switched it on. Not sure if this is my Dad again, I’m forever asking for messages and signs, poor man!

Spirit Breezes

Commentary- When I sat down to write this commentary, I pondered if this was, indeed, Liz’s father making an appearance, like she wondered about. Almost immediately, I was reminded of another post in which something quite similar happened, as far as wind/air flow that I call “Spirit Breezes.” 

Hundreds of posts have been written on the GriefandMourning.com site, but as I was looking back through some of them, I remembered, Unexplainable Wind Gust and I realized that it was also Liz’s post, as well. 

When I realized this, I thought, “Of course, this was Liz’s father!” It’s funny, but it seems that some of our departed loved ones have favorite ways of informing us of their visit. It’s like a spirit’s calling card and seems to be somewhat of a unique signature, so we know it’s them.

However, it’s not that they can’t come to us in other ways, and… they sometimes do. It’s just that coming to us in a similar way each time, helps us to know with clarity that they are the one who has come to us with a message, to remind us of their love, and that they are still with us.

A message with a unique signature

A message with a unique signature Credit: Pixabay

Stress and the Grief Process

Understanding how stress plays a sizable part in the Grief Process and ways to decrease it to make grieving easier.

At one time or another, we’ve all experienced periods of intense stress in our lives. Some of these stressors might include: food, housing and job insecurity, political unrest, family issues, enduring abusive relationships, trouble with or losing a relationship, being in poor health or losing a loved one through death.

Unlike short bouts of stress involving just one or two stressors, trying to survive a world pandemic is a huge sustained stressor that includes many of these factors at the same time. Think of the ramifications of all this. There is nothing greater than trying to survive so much of this at once. Although it doesn’t make it any easier, the insane amount of stress you may be feeling is being felt by many, worldwide.

Who knows when it will end? How many more will this pandemic claim to itself? When will the consequences of it play out? Will we find our way through this in one piece? So many questions up in the air with so few answers. So much doubt and fear. So many feelings of helplessness. So many subtle, and even outright threats of violence, too. You can feel the deep rumble of fear and uncertainty. With emotions high, it can feel like we are living in a powder keg on the verge of a spark. We are really living through something quite extraordinary… and something so very serious.

Our lives have been changed forevermore. With all this rapid change coming at us, with so much loss, many of us will need to work our way through some version of a grief process – just to get to the other side of this darkness. We may already feel the tremendous weight of this now, if not later. The intense stress we may experience, added to our loss, has the capacity to make things even worse. You see, grief and stress have a lot in common.

Just a reminder that the grief process has several identifiable steps, depending on which version you read. To make it easy, I will go with the most tried and true steps. They don’t always go in order and some of them are more prominent than others.

  • shock, denial and disbelief
  • bargaining, feelings of helplessness
  • sadness and/or anxiousness
  • anger and/or rage
  • coming to terms with what’s so
  • acceptance

If you find yourself in the Grief Process, you might be experiencing one or more of these steps. That’s perfectly normal. How long it takes to heal, depends on how long it takes to get through the steps of the process, without trying to resist going through them. There is no set time frame. Every person is different. But, almost every one of these steps in the grief process, except the last two, happens to come along with a great amount of stress. Hence, it is possible to add even more stress on top of the already existing stress that naturally comes with grieving a loss, or several of them at the same time. Not surprisingly, feeling these human emotions can be extremely stressful. It’s no wonder at all why people try to deny feeling them in the first place. But… the only way out is through. So, a word to the wise… go through with as little resistance as possible.

Just remember a few simple things that everyone already knows, but forgets to use, especially when stressed.

  • Be kind to yourself and others. In times of crisis, it is common to see people either being their weakest self or their greatest self. The power comes with choosing which one you will be in any moment. Here’s a hint. Being your greatest self is more empowering and really makes a big difference in the world around you.
  • Remember to breathe. You hear it all the time as some sort of cliche, but breathing really does regulate stress levels and is such an easy thing to do. Do it by breathing deeply and it will relax your brain and body. It will give some temporary relief… at least until the next time you breathe deeply.
  • Look for ways to empower yourself. When it seems that things are going the wrong way, the human default is likely to feel victimized. However, no matter how bad it may be, feelings of helplessness and hopelessness are of no help. Instead of being on the defensive because something is happening to you, realize that it is happening to many of us. Be on the offensive and take control, wherever you can find ways to be helpful and move hope forward. It may be small, but you will not stay frozen and numb as you will be in motion.
  • Move your body. Take a walk, run or bike ride. Exercising your body is a great stress and anxiety reliever. Walk in place if you can’t go outside.
  • Feed your spirit. Meditate, pray or listen to/watch whatever will relax your brain and body. Make it something that will nurture, recharge and feed your spirit.
  • Practice gratitude. Appreciating what you do have is so much more powerful than focusing on what is missing. Experiencing the “glass half full” rather than the “glass half empty” is always more empowering.
  • Surrender to the process. The grief process is an amazing healing process that, if not resisted, has the ability to completely cleanse and mend. It is our brain’s natural process to follow so our brains can heal from the trauma and turmoil that has been inflicted. Not surrendering to what is in our best interest, which is our healing, creates even more stress than the stress that already exists. Surrendering to “what is” – IS NOT weak, it is smart, as we will get through our pain, way quicker, and… will heal much deeper.

In this world, there is no way to get around stressful situations, or the grief that contributes to them, as this is just a part of our human experience. As you go through your grief process, remember that – although painful, each of the steps can be very therapeutic, as going through many of these steps is so necessary for us to heal and be refreshed.

And remember, many people fall into a “stress trap.” If you didn’t get it the first time, a “stress trap” is when you keep adding stress on top of already existing stress. The simple exercises above can help greatly. You just have to do them.

There will be plenty of grief in the times ahead of us. We will not soon forget the pain and stress this pandemic has caused, but let’s do whatever we can to hold on, and however we can, get each other through this truly extraordinary challenging time. Hopefully, before to long, we will find ourselves out of this darkness and into the light of a new day.

A Non-Believer’s Experience

As a hardcore non-believer in an afterlife, with his wife’s passing, Jayson’s mind is quickly changed to show him it exists.

Jayson writes:
“I was possibly the most skeptical person you could find when it came to this kind of stuff. Seriously, didn’t buy any of it. If your dead, your dead. That was it for me.”

“I won’t go into the details but, my wife, mother of my 4 children passed away 3 years ago. 7 days after her death a single Lily grew in our backyard under the tree. This was her favorite flower.”

“We had never planted lilies or really even ventured back to that part of the yard. There is a bit of a steep slope under the tree so, it was hard to get to. But, there it grew. One lone lily. And from that day on, I knew. I knew there was more to this whole thing. It gave such a sense of relief that she was okay and onto greener pastures. (No pun intended).”

“That’s my story. I now know that death is not the end. Quite possibly the beginning. I’m not arrogant enough to claim I know anything more than what I’ve seen and felt. But I can assure you….This isn’t it.”

Commentary- Occasionally, a non-believer will write to genuinely ask me how I know that all this afterlife stuff is real. It’s a really easy question to answer.

In so many words, Jayson said it perfectly with the sharing of his own after-death experience. Basically, you don’t know anything about this spiritual stuff until the moment that you do. When you have a personal “beyond this world” experience that is undeniable, there is no longer any question to entertain. Even if you can’t understand it, like Jayson, when it happens, you know first-hand that this afterlife stuff is real… and you can never go back.

So hang in there non-believers who want to believe. Just one moment can change everything in an instant. 

Visiting A Departed Loved One

Receiving an after-death communication from a departed loved one is an out-of-this-world experience. What if it were possible for us to visit them, as well?

Christian

Christian

It’s been 10 years since that tragic day of Christian‘s passing. It happened on March 31, 2010. With the ambulance on its way, Christian struggled for his life. In the end, it wasn’t meant to be.

Those were some of the darkest days I’ve ever experienced. For sure, there were some dark years to follow. I don’t know if I could have ever survived that great loss had he not visited me so much from the afterlife. It was with dreams, visions, and the other forms of communication, as well as some things he left behind for me, that he taught me so much about life and the afterlife. I learned that it’s really all just one big thing. An example of this is the Yin/Yang symbol. Each side of black and white look so different when really they are both sides to the same whole. For his teachings I am eternally grateful to him for his comfort and illumination.

The other day as I was going through older posts I had written, I ran across a beautiful experience that I had written about visiting Christian, after his death. For reference, the post is, Never Far From Home. The very next morning of remembering this amazing experience, I woke up from another “dream” of the same exact variety. This made me realize- even more so, that as our departed loved ones sometimes visit us with a sign or after-death communication, it is possible for us, on a spiritual level, to venture off to visit them in their world, too. Although mostly, it is quite accidental that we make this discovery.

It just so happened that during that same time frame, a man wrote to me, puzzled and somewhat disappointed as to why, when he was so happy to see his beloved wife while lucid dreaming, she did not notice him at all. That subject does not come up much. It is probably because when it happens, people just think it was some sort of a meaningless, but cruel dream. People may also take it as though their departed loved one is ignoring them, because they are mad or disappointed, when they are not. This kind of thing can bring up insecurity in the bereaved, creating even more pain from their loss.

As I was wondering what to share to honor Christian’s 10 year anniversary of passing, with my recent realization, as well as this man’s question, I realized that the sharing of this subject of us visiting our departed loved ones and the illumination of it, was the right thing to post.

I chose this recent dream of mine to translate, as I saw that it plainly laid out some important steps in the mechanics of how these visitations with our loved ones, take place.  After looking deeper into what, at first look, seemed like a hodgepodge dream that could have easily been dismissed, in it, I found some real gems of insight, hopefully important enough to shed some light.

In my dream, I went into the garage to get some air. The garage door was open and it was dark out there beyond my garage door to the outside world. To my right, I noticed there was a reflection on the window of a vehicle that was parked there in the garage. At first, it didn’t make sense as there was no light source to make that possible.

As I turned to focus on what was causing the light reflection, I saw it was Christian. It was like watching him on a television. He never looked at me once. He didn’t even know that I was there. I saw him from the side view. The image was mostly full length. He looked very happy and occupied with something that gave him great pleasure. Then, I slowly woke up as I transitioned back into my physical daytime world.

Now, about visiting our departed loved ones. I will repeat the dream again, breaking it down, but with the symbolic translation this time, as well as, some steps to be aware of to recognize this phenomenon when it does happen.

In my dream, I went into the garage to get some air.
Translation: I needed a new perspective, so I went outside my home (my body) to accomplish this. My spirit did not go far from my body when this happened as I stayed within the garage. Wanting to get some air is also wanting to get a fresh breath of new perspective, as this is considered vital to a healthy functioning life.
Steps: Open to new perspectives. Willingness to see them. Considering perspective to be vital, healthy and important to understanding others, self and the life/afterlife in which we live. 

The garage door was open and it was dark out there beyond my garage door to the outside world.
Translation: My mind was open and I was available to be shown something just outside what many call, “The box.” The darkness represents the unknown. I was okay with going into the unknown or “out of the box” to be shown something new. The outside world to me represents “God” territory.
Steps: Again. Having an open mind. Willing to be vulnerable and teachable. Wanting to know something and being willing to let go enough to know. Being aware of the fact that we don’t know everything, in fact, we know very little in relation to what is there. Trusting the process and that in the end, what is called “God” is the only knower of everything and will enlighten us.

To my right, I noticed there was a reflection on the window of a vehicle as it was parked there in the garage. At first, it didn’t make sense as there was no light source to make that possible.
Translation: At first, here is my brain trying to make sense of something it considers to be illogical, as this did not seem to follow the laws of the physical world. However, through time, my brain has gotten used to the fact that it doesn’t always understand many of the spiritual events of my life. My brain knows that much of the knowledge of spiritual events exist beyond it’s reach of understanding. My brain does not see this as a threat. In this case, my brain quickly realized that the light source was one of a spiritual nature, and unthreatened, sat back to marvel at what it saw.
Steps: Be open to spiritual events. Be open to possibilities that seem to be impossible for the brain to consider. The brain can’t explain everything and that’s okay. It doesn’t have to in order for one to have spiritual experiences.

As I turned to focus on what was causing the light reflection, I saw it was Christian. It was like watching him on a television.
Translation: The television in the glass window of the vehicle was a portal, a window through time/no time, just like the window I also watched him through in my post, Never Far From Home. That window just manifested itself a little differently, but it was a portal nonetheless. Windows and openings to view through or enter are usually spiritual portals. I saw into this portal with my spiritual eyes since the event happened with my physical eyes closed while in a lucid dream.
Steps: Be willing to see what’s there. Some people are afraid to look. Open your eyes enough that your spiritual eyes will open up, too. If there is fear, change it into excitement. If there is cynicism and doubt, transform that into wonder. Being a spiritual explorer means visiting new spiritual dimensions with enthusiasm and awe.

Christian never looked at me. He didn’t even know that I was there. Though I saw him from the side view, mainly, his image was mostly full and actual length.
Translation: If you really think about the logistic of this, this would have actually been impossible in the physical reality, given the full length size of Christian (6’3″), and the smaller size of even the largest car window (2 feet, tops). He was actual size in the window, but the window of the vehicle was quite a bit smaller. These are examples of unexplained space distortions that are also an indication of occurring spiritual events.
Also, the fact that he didn’t look at me is clear. He didn’t see me.
Steps: Spiritual phenomena may seem strange to some. For sure, it is foreign to many of us in this physical existence. Because of this, it is important to adjust your personal/worldview perspective to be able to adapt. Learning to recognize spiritual experiences is kind of like learning a new language, or better said… remembering it. It’s like blurring your eyes to bring something else into focus. It’s like tuning in to the background of life; all the subtleties It’s about nuance, too. It’s about allowing the self as you know it to expand and become limitless.

He looked very happy and occupied with something that gave him great pleasure. Then, I woke up. 
Translation: Although he didn’t see me, I got to see him. He was happy and busy doing something he loved. He is fine.
Steps: Be open to the possibility of seeing them, as well as, the other way around. We are really never far away from those we love.
Keep a dream journal at your bedside and record your dreams before they fade away. There is a lot of information contained for you in those dreams. You can always translate the contents later if you don’t have the chance to do it right away, but it’s really difficult to recall the dream of your departed loved one as you get even moments farther from it. 

Sometimes we have dreams of our loved ones who have passed. We are hopeful when we do, but when they don’t turn to acknowledge us, it can cause some emotional pain. Like, how cruel to finally get to see our loved one and they don’t even see us. We often discount the experience as just a dream without ever realizing that when they visit us… many times we don’t turn to acknowledge them, either. This is just what happens. Sometimes we don’t meet up at the right times, but we do visit one another to some degree, and sometimes when we do meet up, it’s because together again, we’ve aligned for that single moment in time… until we align for good, in the next realm together forever.

Stonehenge Alignment

Stonehenge Alignment Image:Pixabay

Rising To The Occasion Amid Covid-19

COVID-19 covers the face of the Planet now, but we are in this together. Even with our hardships, let’s commit to rise to the occasion. If so… we got this!

Coronavirus Image: Pixabay

An apocalypse of sorts is revealed as a new and threatening virus is made known to all. A virus that is quickly spreading over the face of the planet. Just an innocent microorganism, doing what microorganisms do- in this case, a virus just trying to survive by finding hosts that will allow itself to spread from one person to another. Except… this microorganism has the potential to be deadly to us, as it infects its human hosts for proliferation. Unfortunately, this pathogen creates a tremendous threat on humankind, that may inevitably, to some degree, cause a restart on humanity at large, or at least, our way of life.

Although many saw it coming from a distance, as it approaches ever closer, we now know it’s real. Many public places are shutting their doors. Sheltering in place, people are hunkering down for the long term. Our life is changing. Our habits will do the same. There will be a lot of adjustments to make as we deal with the perpetual cabin fever that is sure to come, as the weather improves. But that’s just the little stuff.

Fear is spreading, too. Many are imagining the worst. The food is off grocery store shelves. The medical staff desperately needs supplies and equipment. The gun stores are crowded. People are clamoring for real answers to real questions.  These thoughts have caused panic among some, creating great distress. “What about work?” “How will we pay for this, that and the other?” “Where did our 401K go?” “Will those on the street find shelter, food and care?” “Will we get sick?” “Will we survive?” There is a lot to consider here. And, as organisms ourselves, who are programmed for survival, it is natural that we would find ourselves confronted with the dark thoughts of our own mortality.

Coronavirus Image: Pixabay

Coronavirus Image: Pixabay

Although it might become as bad as we think, and although it’s difficult not to, it does no good to worry and fret. It is what it is. It will be what it will be. For much of it, the dye has been cast. With all the chaos… with all the fear going around about who will live and who will fall prey to this invisible force, will humankind rise to the occasion?

What I really mean is, will we as imperfect human beings rise to the occasion of greatness without having to die first? Will we rise up from our mortal to our immortal heavenly selves to see from a higher perspective and evolve ourselves into greater beings?

Our lives will change as we know them. There will be stuff we don’t like. There will be tragedies, too. But, because of our forced shift in perspective, we will discover new ways of living, important breakthroughs will be made, technology will increase, new creations will be conceived, children too, and new ways of being will give us an opportunity to be greater than we ever thought ourselves to be. This moment will truly define us, individually and collectively, as we are asked to evolve as humans.

As the alarm bells go off, it’s like we are awakening to this new reality that is directly speaking to us, as if to say, “Wake up! Pay attention! Look at who you are being in the whole mix of things. Is this who you are choosing to be? Is this how you choose to live. Many are rethinking their priorities.

I’m just saying, since we are also organisms just trying to survive, as intelligent organisms, we can make a choice. Let’s reach out to others, in the non-physical ways, of course, in ways that can help. You know, we could choose to be part of the solution in solving this devastating problem for humankind. Here are some thoughts. Choosing…

Positivity over negativity.

Faith over fear.

Love over hatred.

Kindness over cruelty.

Grace over disgrace.

Adaptability over rigidity.

Compassion over indifference.

Calmness and centeredness over panic.

Service and selflessness over selfishness.

Patience over frustration

Bravery over cowardice.

Encouragement over despair.

Inspiration over resignation.

Making a difference in the world over making no difference at all.

Many of us might not be out on the front lines, but adopting these qualities in ourselves would work to hold space for the world at large, as it fights a war against an invisible enemy. It’s also a good practice to adopt, thereby evolving ourselves to be far greater beings.

Like the 5.7 magnitude earthquake we recently had in Utah, that scared us all when the land furiously shifted, I realize that we, humanity as a whole, are experiencing a shift, as well. However bad this gets, it is also an important opportunity and test for us to band together as a whole and to do what we can to make a difference.

Will we rise to the occasion individually? Will we rise collectively? Will we make that shift? It’s up to us. Resignation or inspiration? Rising to the occasion requires us to rise up from our everyday, default selves to our inspirational (in spirit) heavenly selves. Doesn’t that part sound amazing?

My prayers go out to those suffering from COVID-19 at this time. May you have a speedy recovery.

My condolences to those whose loved one has now or is about to pass away. May you be comforted in your sorrow. May their light assist our planet from beyond.

A shout out of gratitude to all those brave humans who are now on the front lines in this unexpected war; all medical staff, first responders, law officials, helpful and engaged policy officials, grocery store workers, transportation workers, truck drivers and warehouse/delivery workers, to name a few. Thank you!

A shout out to teachers, childcare workers, workers in online communication and technology, media, musicians, curbside restaurants workers and all workers, essential and otherwise, that I have missed listing, but will be more clearly realized and recognized as we go through this challenging time. They are heroes, in my book. All of who are an important part of the solution. Thank you!

Covid-19 Covers the Planet

Covid-19 Covers the Planet

One day, when this virus finally loses its power, we will eventually mourn and heal our losses; our loved ones who have succumb to the virus. We will realize how much the circumstances of our lives have changed, and maybe, cry about that, too. But we are not alone in this. Like it or not, the whole world IS our family and we are all in this together. Let’s rise to the occasion and do it with greatness. Now that we are paying attention… let us have a new appreciation for the wonder of our world and people in it and maybe the reset can be one of love and kindness. Let us be as Heaven is. Rising to the occasion is about bringing Heaven to Earth. This is my hope and prayer.

Stay well and be safe, kind, adaptable, compassionate… and all that was previously mentioned. Together we got this!
with love,
jade

Understanding Shared-Death Phenomena

Experiencing a spiritual phenomenon is amazing but can occur as jarring, as it calls the true nature of reality into question. Trust your spiritual senses.

Jay writes:
“It was January 1985. My mother, Ethel, was feeling very weak. She visited her doctor who said her heartbeat had become irregular and that she should be admitted to Maimonides Hospital in Brooklyn, New York, ASAP.”

“At the hospital, the doctor said that she needed a pacemaker. After receiving the pacemaker, she seemed well. They said they wanted to monitor her for a day or two before releasing her.”

“However, the second night she was in the hospital, I received a call from one of the doctors at about 3 AM, saying she had had a difficult night and was not doing well. They recommended that I come to the hospital immediately.”

“When I got to her room, one of the doctors said they almost lost her earlier but she was doing better. I went to her bedside. She was on a ventilator and seemed in distress. Because she was on a ventilator, she could not speak to me. She was in and out of consciousness but clearly upset when awake.”

“An alarm went off and the doctor and a nurse went to my mother’s bedside and began giving her CPR. As they worked on her, classical music played in the background. I do not recall a radio being in the room, but I recall thinking that the doctor must have put that music on to keep him relaxed while he was giving CPR.”

“As I stood there watching the scene of the doctor and nurse giving CPR to my mother, I saw a shadow slowly rise up from my mother’s body; a shadow that was clearly her. In the shadow, she was still in a hospital gown. Her face and body were quite clear. She appeared to look down at the scene of the doctor and nurse working on her body and me standing nearby. On her face, she had an expression of total shock and confusion, as if she was trying to understand what was happening.”

“After a while, the shadow seemed to return to her body. I assumed the doctor and nurse saw her image rise up as well, and would explain this phenomenon to me when they finished giving CPR.  However, they never said a word about it. If they did see it, they didn’t say, and I never asked about it. My mother died a few hours later.”

“I have been haunted by this experience my entire life. Was it my imagination?  What happened that night? What I witnessed seemed quite clear to me at the time. I was quite awake. It seemed more than real.”

“I think about this experience often, even to this day. I often search to see if others have had similar experiences. It is only because of the internet that I have learned about the concept of Shared Death Experiences. I believe that this experience was an SDE. I have never had another experience like this.”

Commentary- Shared-death experiences are not as well known as after-death communications, but they are happening with increasing frequency as this spiritual reality begins to permeate everyday consciousness. That is, in general, when we know a possibility exists, we are more open and available to experiencing it for ourselves. 

Although in Jay’s case, he was completely caught off guard as his brain struggled to make sense of the inexplicable at the time. Our brains take in a lot of information in each moment. Much of this information focuses on an estimation of navigating and surviving our environment in all areas of life, in the best way possible. It’s not that we are always conscious of this, but if you purposely tune into to even a small area of your life, you can see that your brain has some sort of a plan to succeed at its intended goals. 

A simple example of this would be to do something or be a certain way as to avoid pain or trouble. The human brain is always making calculations. Since the brain is so busy with every second of life, it screens out excess, irrelevant material. One’s brain may operate within a particular bandwidth, thereby eliminating what it considers NOT important to one’s immediate physical, emotional, mental survival and may discount the “on the fringes” spiritual aspect.

So, you can imagine the surprise when Jay experienced what he did. His thoughts, then focused on the very survival of his mother, most unexpectedly led him into the “spiritual fringes” as his mother’s life hung in the balance. He heard classical music playing as a background soundtrack as the doctor and nurse worked furiously to revive her. Surely there must have been a logical explanation for this. Jay’s brain was trying to make sense of this spiritual episode. Well, at least his logical left brain side was.

To top that off, Jay witnesses his mother’s spirit rising from her body. Seeing her expression clearly, it was most apparent that she, too, was struggling with the whole event. Between Jay and his mother, they were experiencing a similar form of denial; one of the brain and the other of the mind. These levels of consciousness can appear as the same until the spirit is further away from its physical body, at which point a greater consciousness takes over.

Interestingly, the vision of his mother was so obvious to Jay that he was sure the nurse and doctor could have seen it. The thing is, while they were busy focusing on the physical survival of Jay’s mother, he was able to catch a glimpse of her spirit.

I wrote about Shared-death experience many years ago, after I went to a lecture given by Psychiatrist, Dr. Raymond Moody. He recorded an enormous collection of people’s after-death communications. In all his writings, he would never settle on the validity of these after-death communications. But finally, after many years, he did finally come out, in that lecture, for the reality of these other-worldly experiences, as he bore his first-hand witness account of the shared-death experience he experienced with his mother’s passing. You can read this account at, Shared-Death Experience.

Jay talks about the haunting that comes from not understanding what happened or how it was even possible. While the left side of our brain often questions spiritual events as illogical, to the right brain, spiritual phenomena is especially logical and makes perfect sense. It’s that simple. Jay existed in that spiritual world for a time. He experienced what he experienced in the spiritual realm, before he was released back into the physical realm.

A common hallmark of Jay’s experience in the spiritual world is found in what Jay mentioned. He said his experience seemed more real than the reality of this life, or the reality of what we are used to. Spiritual experiences demonstrate that there is more to this physical reality than we know and the spiritual realm can seem considerably more real than the physical one. Since we dwell in this physical realm, it may not be our usual experience to constantly perceive our lives through a spiritual lens. Some will more than others. But, although we do at times, it’s an amazing thing when we witness a spiritual event. Jay was given something very special. Besides being physically present when his mother passed, he was spiritually present enough to witness it. For sure, Jay must be pleased to know his mother still exists beyond the body..

For those who believe in an afterlife, we know that at our core, we are spiritual beings, first, experiencing a physical experience. We know that spiritual experiences, however fleeting, they are real. However, having dwelled in the physical dimension for some time, we become accustomed to forgetting our original selves, while thinking that our physical senses rule.

But, being a multi-dimensional being in the physical realm, it’s important that we remember that we are actually both.