In this after-death communication and out-of-body experience, a grieved mother is reunited with her son. As he held his mother, his message to her? ” I love you too, Mama. Don’t worry. Everything is okay.”
“In the beginning when I would dream of Brian, I would not be aware that he had died. I’m not sure when this changed, but now, even while dreaming I am aware that he has died.”
“Most of my dreams of Brian are of watching him at some stage of his life. There is no spoken communication or physical touching, just eye contact. I have repeatedly asked to have a dream where I can hug him and talk to him. Well, my prayers were answered a couple of weeks ago. I had the most vivid dream that I have had since he died.”
This is the dream (communication)-
“I drove into the parking lot of his best friend’s restaurant. As I parked my car, I could see Brian through the window tending bar. I got out of my car and ran into the restaurant. I could see him running around the bar to meet me. As I was approaching him, I remember thinking that this would be a regular dream and as soon as I got close to him he would disappear. That did not happen! I grabbed him and hugged him. (I can still feel it.) I said, “Honey, I miss you so much! Do you know how much I love you? Do you know how special our lives are because of you?“ He said, “ I love you too, mama. Don’t worry. Everything is okay.”
“That’s all that I remember. It felt so real.”
“I’m also convinced that my four-year-old nephew sees Brian. He tells us that he does. He said he was at my Birthday dinner. He also said that he wishes Brian could stay on the ground with us and not keep going back up to heaven.”
“I’m afraid to ask my nephew any questions about it. I don’t want him to think anything is unusual about the experience or scare him. Right now he doesn’t believe there is anything out of the ordinary about it.”
Commentary- In the first couple of paragraphs you can see that, although Brian’s passing is still extremely painful, Valley is beginning to heal from the tremendous wound that split her heart in two. She appears to be over the denial phase, which isn’t just necessarily reserved for the beginning of the grief process…it can actually be present throughout the process, within small pockets of our thinking. The evidence of her healing is that when she dreams of Brian, she now knows and is very aware in her dream that he has crossed over.
Valley also seems to be having a life review of Brian. This is why she sees him at different stages of his life. Like the peeling of an onion, Valley’s brain is busy healing the many layers of her life without him. Although this does not happen to everyone, this life review is very much needed for Valley to begin to come to terms with the trauma of her great loss. She is in the reconciliation phase. It’s clear Brian has crossed over and her brain is in the process of mending the damage wherever it can so it can find some peace.
The brain is quite resilient. While it doesn’t seem possible to ever come to terms with such a significant loss as the death of a loved one; we can and often do. Death; this shunned and often ignored part of life is often considered to be an interruption to our lives, and even, a deep insult that it would even happen. When in fact, death is very much a part of life. We always knew that deep down. With time, as we begin to gain some perspective, we can heal and move forward. And sometimes it takes a lot of time and perspective to begin to see the larger picture of it all.
In this bar; the stage where Valley and Brian were allowed to meet, Valley was able to visit with her son again. Just when she thought he would disappear as she finally reached his side, he was still there, excited to see his mom. What a relief this must have been for her! In this place, somewhere between Heaven and Earth, Valley and Brian were able to reunite, embrace and share their feelings again.
You’ll notice that Brian was casually working at his friend’s bar, which represents the day-to-day of life. Or perhaps… just another day in “life after death”, or “life after that other life” life. You see Brian’s reaction to his mother, as she tells him of her love and how much she has missed him since his passing. He tries to give her confidence when he so clearly tells her of his truth, “I love you too, Mama. Don’t worry. Everything is okay.”
After a loved one has crossed over, most of us panic with fear to think we are separated from our loved one. But you can tell this is not Brian’s point of view. He is calm and peaceful as he reassures his mother. His demeanor seems to convey, “Separation? What separation?” Separation is our view, NOT their view. They know we are always connected together in a way that physical brains can’t quite comprehend.
I can’t emphasize it enough, our loved ones have a greater perspective than we do. They can see more of the picture. They know that this “death” thing is no big deal. You see, they no longer have fear.
But we sure do! And a lot of it, too!
Our fear is what causes so much of our pain; our fear that we are separated, our fear that we have little or no control over life, our fear of the future without them and our fear of having to feel our deepest pains from our deepest losses.
You see, while we have long ignored the possibility that death would ever come to us or our loved ones, and especially an early death that would rob us of so much more life, we have missed out on something very important. The Big Picture. Life or Death? It’s always LIFE, for we can never truly die. Brian only appears to be gone from “life” through the process of “death” but he exists in a greater life; one that those still here on Earth are not yet privy to. But will be… when our time is up.
One day, like Brian and so many other loved ones who have gone on, we will look back to our old and very limited perspectives of being an Earthling and wonder… Why did we ever let fear get the best of us? Why did we ever doubt? Only then we will see… There is no separation AND that fear is not real. It’s only something our brain does when we lose our physical connection with them. But be not deceived by the physical senses of a brain, we are much more than that! If only we would take a moment to really tune into the depths of our soul, we would know the truth, which is… Only love is real.
Of all the lessons one could learn in the school of our “so called life”, despite what a fearful brain has to say about it, the most important and valuable teaching we could ever embrace and assimilate is in TRUSTING THAT LOVE and that our CONNECTION is a REAL, CONTINUAL and EVERLASTING BOND.
“The day he broke the 60-year course record held at Tanglewood Golf Course. (Brian’s home course) Brian shot a 59 that day. The previous record was 61. The previous record had been held by Miller Barber.”
“Lainey was Brian’s girlfriend. He was bringing her home for Thanksgiving to meet all of us. Then, they were leaving for the Dominican republic for two weeks where he was going to propose marriage. Of course, that never happened. I’m in regular contact with Lainey. She’s a very important part of all of our lives.”
“The first thing I noticed when I got to the hospital that night in Lubbock, was that he had shaved. LOL. Lainey said he couldn’t stand it.”
“I love you too, mama. Don’t worry. Everything is okay.”