Category Archives: Empowerment

Self-empowerment is more important than power because it comes from within instead of without.

Running With the Bulls

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On a recent trip to my dentist, Dr. Clint told me about an experience he had, just a few weeks earlier.

Having been on the “bucket list” of one of Dr. Clint’s old High School friends, his buddy suggested that he, Dr. Clint and another High School friend go on an adventure to Spain.

photo credit: sfgate.com

photo credit: sfgate.com

So now, in their mid 40’s, Dr. Clint and two old best friends took the plunge, when they flew out to Spain in July to go “Running with the bulls!”

All dressed in the appropriate “bull-running” attire, Dr. Clint and his two friends waited on the narrow street for the bulls to catch up to them, so they could have the harrowing experience of running along side of these ferocious beasts… that is… if they didn’t get maimed by one or more!

finance.yahoo.com

photo credit: finance.yahoo.com

Although the whole run, with over 100 participants and 12 bulls, lasted only 4 minutes, Dr. Clint said it was the most terrifying, but best 4 minutes of his life! By the time they ran down the narrow street that corralled them into an arena, Dr. Clint and his friends thought they were finally “out of the woods”… or “streets”, should I say, and wanted to hop the fence to leave, but both police and Spaniards alike, shoed any participants wanting to get out, off the fence, and back into the arena!

That wouldn’t have been so bad, I guess, except the bulls had also been let into the arena too, and as one of Dr. Clint’s friends glanced over, he found the eyes of a bull locked upon him. Having had enough, at this point, Dr. Clint started to panic and hopped the fence anyway, while his two other friends took their chances in the arena with the bulls for a little while longer.
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Higher-Self Communication

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There are times in our lives when we want or need to talk to a particular person in order to complete something of importance, BUT, actually doing so… may seem too difficult for us, if even impossible. Reasons for this lack of communication may include:

  • Not knowing the person well enough, so approaching them could be awkward or even embarrassing.
  • We speak different languages.
  • We’ve lost contact, with no way of locating them.
  • This person may live too far away, and maybe, even so far away that they are no longer on this planet.
  • The person we want or need to speak to isn’t in a good position to be contacted by us, or… if we did contact them, perhaps they would refuse to speak to us, or hear our message.
  • Or maybe… it is even our own pride that prevents us from speaking with them.
  • The one we want to speak to is an animal.

But, it’s possible that this is the most difficult one of all…

  • It could be that the issues between the two are so sticky, that every attempt to sort things through leaves those involved with an attitude of defensiveness and frustration, causing both to walk away while throwing their arms up in the air in sheer resignation!

You may have experienced this before. Completely discouraged by the many attempts to communicate, but to no avail, and now… you’ve finally given up the thought and hope that this issue between the two of you could ever be rectified.

But… whatever the circumstances are, it ends the same; you are left with the sense of the incompletion that continually hangs over your head, just begging to be resolved and put to rest.

More than likely, what you really wanted or needed to tell this person was something that you never got a chance to say; for example: to give an apology, to ask or accept forgiveness, to straighten something out, to make a request or to give them your love and/or blessings? Or maybe, you just wanted to be heard and were uncertain that you ever were in the past.
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Choosing Love

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"choosing love" meme

“Keep choosing love” meme

Choosing love doesn’t mean we won’t ever be hurt, disappointed or angry with someone. To ignore our feelings in the face of an upset would be inauthentic, since feelings are a natural part of being human. Choosing love only means that after we have fully acknowledged and experienced our feelings, that we allow the painful emotional energy to move quickly through us. This completion process is what makes healing possible, so we can get back to the business of experiencing our feelings of love again.

Choosing love doesn’t mean we have to share the same beliefs and values as another. It doesn’t mean we have to agree or have the same opinion either. In a world with so much diversity as ours, how could we all see things from exactly the same point of view?
Choosing love only means that we allow another to have his or her perspective, as well.

Choosing love doesn’t mean we have to like the choices people make or actions that they take. Many times we won’t. But, who are we to think someone should live his or her life according to all our expectations anyway? Choosing love only means that we still love them, even if we don’t approve.

Choosing love doesn’t mean you have to forget that someone hurt or violated you or someone you love, although you probably wish you could. Choosing love just means that to heal, forgiveness may be in order… not just for them, but especially for yourself; so you can find peace.
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Overcoming Fear- Facing Inner Demons

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Cartoon about comparing Inner Demons

Cartoon about comparing Inner Demons

They’re Ba-ack! I thought I’d already sent them packing once and for all, but apparently they didn’t listen very well. One thing is for sure; they expect you to listen perfectly to them! That’s why they come to catch you in a weak moment… and cornering you within the confines of your own head, relentlessly recite your past mistakes to you; like you somehow weren’t already aware of them! They tell you why you should or shouldn’t have done what you did, followed by a judgment… or five about it! You know, those errors you made in the past when you were young and less experienced. Or… even just yesterday, when you were unaware and didn’t consider every other possible choice than the one you did, and because you didn’t, this left you in a bad spot.

Maybe you’ve noticed them before… those critical voices in your head, that, like the mob coming to extort, yet, another payment from you, badger you, sometimes in a soft and subtle way, and sometimes in a loud and abrupt one. But either way, it all ends the same… they want you to pay for something. Even if you have already paid before, they forget… or don’t care… and come back for more! Their favorite currency is in the form of your guilt, shame and regret. So, unless you are blissfully unaware, conscience-less and don’t care, or have already learned the secret to making them stop, then… welcome to this awesome human experience! (kidding off course)

Throughout time, these disparaging voices have been referred to as, “the critical parent”, “the judge and jury”, “the committee”, or “inner demons”, just to name a few. And because they can be so damn mean, leave some convinced that these “mental tormentors” are really “outer demons”… as who would really do this to oneself?
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Lessons From the Geese

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geese flying in formation

geese flying in formation

… a message from geese about how people can practice working together.

As each bird flaps it’s wings, it creates an uplift for others behind him. There is 71% more flying range in V-formation than flying alone.
Lesson: People who share a common direction and sense of common purpose can get there quicker.

Whenever a goose flies out of formation, it quickly feels the drag and tries to get back in position.
Lesson: It’s harder to do something alone than together.

When the lead goose gets tired, it rotates back into the formation and another goose flies at the head.
Lesson: Shared leadership and interdependence give us each a chance to lead as well as opportunities to rest.

The geese in formation honk from behind to encourage those in front to keep up their speed.
Lesson: We need to make sure our honking is encouraging and not discouraging.

When a goose gets sick or wounded and falls, two geese fall out and stay with it until it revives or dies. Then, they catch up or join another flock.
Lesson: Stand by your people in difficult times, as well as in good.

(Lessons from the Geese, was written in 1972 by Dr. Robert McNeish of Baltimore. Dr. McNeish, for many years a science teacher before he became involved in school administration, had been intrigued with observing geese for years and first wrote the piece for a sermon he delivered in his church.)

If we could all work together… just think about how much we could do, and how far we could go. The sky’s the limit when we’re united in cooperation!

Washing the Stress Away

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Ocean washing away the word stress written in the sand

Washing away the stress

Far too often, clients coming for massage therapy complain of all the aches and pain stored within their bodies. Laying themselves upon my soft padded massage table, they begin to unwind and breathe deeper as I work out the stored energy pent up in their muscle tissue. With every breath of relief, and every trigger point released, deeper relaxation sets in, as the body returns more to its natural state of peacefulness.

In my experience, I’ve discovered that, for many people, stress seems to originate at work; the problem being… they are always at work, 24/7! So wrapped up in their work life; trying to do a good job, earning a living, trying to get along with all the different personalities, or working for that promotion, they forget about any life outside of work! The bigger problem in all of this is the mistake of bringing work home. Some people aren’t even aware they are doing this, until the moment they are, and believe me… I have seen some shocked faces when they get it!

Think of it this way, the average person works 40 hours a week. Try this. Whatever amount you get paid per hour at work, instead of that, think about dividing your hourly wage into the 168 hours that make up one full week and see how much you are really getting paid for bringing your work everywhere you are! It’s hardly worth it! Not to mention the stressful impact your work-related thoughts and feelings have on your mind and body.
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Self-Image

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How you see yourself meme

How you see yourself meme

“Hold a picture of yourself long and steadily enough in your mind’s eye and you will be drawn toward it. Picture yourself vividly as defeated and that alone will make victory impossible. Picture yourself vividly as winning and that alone will contribute immeasurably to success. Great living starts with a picture, held in your imagination, of what you would like to do or be.” -Dr. Harry Emerson Fosdick

Is there an aspect of your personality that gives you grief? According to Dr. Maltz, you can change it in just 21 days by following these instruction!

The following practice exercise is a tool made popular by a plastic surgeon named Dr. Maxwell Maltz, who, in his many years of operating on people, noticed that it was impossible to alter a person’s face without altering a person’s inner self, too. This parallel between the outer and inner connected self led to an epiphany that spurred Dr. Maltz’s famous breakthrough work on self-image, self-esteem and the science of the mind, known as Psycho-Cybernetics.

If you want to change something about your personality, whether you are shy, unsuccessful, unmotivated, unhappy or maybe, there is something else you are working on, give this a try. Dr. Maxwell Maltz claims positive and noticeable changes to self-image in only 3 weeks by practicing 30 minutes each day. It takes that long to form a habit. The key to this success is to fool your nervous system by building “new memories” or stored data into your mid-brain and central nervous system.
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The Exit Interview

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Normally, when you hear the words, “exit Interview” you think of the final survey conducted when one is leaving a job or organization… but this “exit interview” is something quite different.

“The Exit Interview” is a excellent personal inventory tool that assists two main groups of people; those nearing the end of life’s journey who are preparing themselves for the afterlife, AND… those intending to leave their past behind who are preparing themselves for starting of a brand new life – while still in this life! Although the destinations may be a little different, the process of leaving the past behind through completion is exactly the same.

When seriously reflected on and completed in it’s entirety, “The Exit Interview” is a powerful process that allows one to consciously face their past by way of observation, assessment and realization. This new awareness leads to the discovery of what, if anything, needs to be handled, settled and/or restored, before one is completely satisfied in moving forward.

Full completion of “The Exit Interview” acts like a reset button in ways, by allowing one to free themselves up by taking the appropriate actions to tie up the loose ends that have been left undone, making those areas of your life complete. Carrying out the last words and actions directed at restoring what has been found missing and/or straightening what has been messed up, goes a long way in cleaning and clearing up the past.
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Saving the World…

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Atlas lifting the world

Atlas lifting the world

… and life’s other fun activities!

A few weeks ago, I joined a fitness club; I figured it was time. Concerned that if I didn’t keep moving, someday I wouldn’t be able to move at all. So faithfully I went to the gym everyday to lift some weights and get back into the swing of things.

After not belonging to a gym for, at least, a decade and a half, I was pumping iron like I was preparing for an upcoming Zombie apocalypse! It actually felt good, as I had missed the kind of energy that comes from a good workout.

So there I was, working out and enjoying some newfound energy… but… “what was the commotion going on in the room next door,” I thought to myself, where I could hear loud music and people having so much fun? With my curiosity piqued, I walked over to look through the wall of windows separating one room from the other. I pretended not to stare too obviously as I tried to figure it out.

people doing Zumba

people doing Zumba

As it turned out, Zumba, the Latin dance workout, was just ending for the hour, resulting in a bunch of sweaty, but smiling women leaving the studio. During all my years of gym inactivity, I had heard of the word, Zumba, but never actually knew what it was or seen it in action. Back at the gym now, and determined to be part of this fun, I returned later that night for a class, excited and ready to go!

Being a beginner, I cautiously took the back row. The upside was that I couldn’t be seen by all of those really experienced Zumba dancers in front of me; the downside was that I could barely see the instructor! Well, my determination and excitement was short-lived as I only lasted about 5 minutes before exiting the room… embarrassed, out of breath and clutching my side.  (Gosh, did I really just admit to that?)
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