When Kristen opens herself to a new romantic relationship, the power of possibility is everywhere! Discover the true magic behind opening the portals of possibility.
“Whee!!! Keep your hands and feet inside the ride at all times!”, Kristen laughs. And with “out of this world” excitement, she attempts to describe the ride she is currently a passenger on inside her new love affair. It’s a ride that’s whisking her off into the realm of the wild blue yonder.
Trying to further capture the exhilaration of her mental state, Kristen uses another analogy, “I don’t know how this is going to play out, but I’m on the river with my hands in the air, not fighting the direction of its flow!” And flowingย she goes.
Smiling as I notice her obvious euphoria, and as if choosing an entree from a cosmic menu, I say to myself,ย “I’ll have some of what she’s having, please!”
As I thought about her state of mind, I couldn’t help but wonder what was creating this wondrous condition. It was as though she was high on something, but what was it?
We’ve all had instances when we felt plugged in. Colors were more vibrant than usual. Momentarily, we were free from the constraints that held us back. We were unfettered by the limitation of density that kept us down. It was as though we became magicallyย light and for a brief moment, even thought we could fly or defy gravityย somehow!
Then, there were the small jolts that gave way to ideas and inspiration, to those electrifying volts that birthed visions and epiphanies so ecstatic, that even a devout non-smoker might have considered having a cigarette afterward!
Sometimes dream-like or surreal, even time itself seemed a bit unusual as we experienced brief bouts of distortion or suspended animation in this entranced state of being.
We noticed that life was fluid, so there was only flow. And flow we did! Everything was a win, every shot was a hit, and temporarily, we found ourselves unbelievably in the zone! Even pieces of a great cosmic puzzle, all of a sudden came together to make sense by showing us the big picture for a brief moment in time!
If we were lucky enough to visit this divine realm for any length of time, it wouldn’t be uncommon to witness the abundance of synchronicity’s and miracles enough to boggle the mind. And there, if we happened to experienced one of the greatest miracles of all, which is the truth of unconditional love, we were truly blessed. In that state,ย we were sureย this enchantment would last forever!
I guess you may be wondering by now. What are these experiences all about?
Even though it shows up in our lives in different shapes and sizes, what I am describing is possibility. When we experience possibility, it’s like a portal opens up to take us out of the box we’ve been in for a little while, OR… a really long time. Finally out of this box, we are free for that moment and each moment of presence that follows. We become free from the confines of the previous thinking of the past! Temporarily in spirit (inspired), you are transported into the realm of possibility and in that realm, you are high on possibility!
Pretty cool, huh? Have you ever experienced this? Some experience this when falling in love, some after the birth of their baby, some when they go to a beautiful place they’ve never seen before. Some experience it when snowboardingย down a newly snow powdered slope, some when the “light bulb” moment of a new idea lights up, and for some… after a spiritual experience left them completely dumbfounded. It could happen on almost any occasion where you are experiencing something newly that is not completely understood.
Okay, so what exactly is possibility? I’ll give you my version of it.
Possibilityย is the spiritual potential for something unknown to be birthed and made manifest at any moment. And when it happens… it is often experienced as a miracle! This is simply because our brains can’t understand or explain it yet!
In this case, Kristen is experiencing falling in love in a new relationship! Aw, romantic love. I will be focusing on romantic love and possibility… and why it does or doesn’t last.
Maybe you’ve noticed this before? I don’t think I need to tell you what happens when negativity from the past creeps into a new relationship. Meaning that your relationship is no longer new and the possibility you once experienced begins to fade away. All of a sudden your newest love interest is exhibiting the qualities of your old love interest. Or… the one before that. What was once endearing to you about your partner is now bordering annoyance. The old issues from the past begin to rise. The evidence is quickly building up for why your partner disappoints in the way he or she is or is not, and why this matters. The connection becomes more difficult to deal with. You both struggle to work through it, but can’t because that possibility is gone. And then… it’sย “NEXT!”
And yes, there is such a thing as negative possibility too. I call it NO-possibility possibility!
It’s also important to make the distinction that the past does not necessarily creep into a relationship. The past creeps into our mindsย about a relationship! What does this mean? This means that we have way more say about how it goes than we might have once thought.
I’m going to tell you something that might shed some light on this whole issue. You see, all brand new things eventually with time, age and in our minds become a reference for something. For what you ask?
Our past experiences.
And… why the crap does this happen?
We are hardwired for it. It’s called survival. So before you move on to the next NEW thing, consider what I’m about to tell you or you will be forever trading in the old for the new while never being satisfied in the long term. Believe me… I speak from experience!
When something awesome happens that we haven’t experienced before, we are actually living an experience that we haven’t processed yet. It’s like 3D, in color, closed caption and high definition. And it feels good too! ย You see, it’s a “living” experience. Yes, living as in “Alive!” Once a “living” experience is processed, it has to go somewhere, right? I mean, we have to make room for other experiences too. Don’t we?
Well, where does it go?
Once the new experience is processed, it gradually becomes integrated into our brains as a brain pattern. So when this “living” experience is captured in a snapshot, it becomes an image or still photo. Are you following? So, here’s some bad news. This can happen with people, too.
Yes, that’s right. Not only can our awesome life experiences eventually become akin to a snapshot of possibility from the past, but the people in our life, too. Even if we see them every day. And… especially if we see them every day!
That’s really sad. Why again?
Because we think we already know them! When we think we’ve figured them out, we are safe again and our brains are in charge from that point on. ย Nothing to fear… except not really knowing that person, newly, on a continual basis. You see, all experiences of people and things eventually get processed as a brain pattern.ย This is why many people choose to move on from a romantic relationship when things go awry. It can seem like there should be a “NEXT” somewhere out there. We think something’s wrong with the state of our relationship and then we go onto the next one; like maybe that one will work. But really… if we are operating in this way, we may feel the need to find someone new to keep us entertained, until our newest enchantment turns and goes the way of the brain pattern. I mean, isn’t this what love is? Isn’t the first yummy part of a relationship genuine, unadulterated love? Well… not really. It’s mostly being high on possibility plus a lot of awesome hormones coursing through your bloodstream! But that’s cool too.
So let me explain why all of this matters. While this phenomenon seems like very bad news, it is really good news too. Remember? We live in the “dual reality” world. This is what we signed up for! Right?
Let me give you an idea about the flip-side of this. Say your loved one leaves you and you are left with a broken heart. Or what if you had a horrible experience that you want to forget ever happened? Or the ultimate unthinkable. What if your loved one dies? Do you really want this to be a non-stop continual living, 3D, in color, closed caption and high definition experience? Probably not.
It is brain patterns, such as these, that help us to heal by allowing us to integrate an experience or memory of a person. I used to think this was unfair until I experienced the death of Christian, which almost killed me. This is what I became fiercely aware of at the time, and slightly grateful for. To remember the pain with that amount of rawness and in that amount of detail would be a continual nightmare and would not allow any space for any other experiences, as it surely would dominate any positive thoughts with its pain. This is why time heals. Unless you are continually tormenting yourself over “what happened and why” you will be healed by the passing of time.ย This is not to say that we won’t miss and love our loved ones if they leave in some way. This does not means we won’t be able to remember amazing moments we shared. This only means, we might actually be able to smile again when thinking of tender moments shared with them. When this happens, you are healing.ย This is why many people have to process the things that happen to them, with conversations or writing it out. Without processing, the past can’t heal to become possibility again.
So, I’m sure you can see now how important this feature is to our design.ย You see, It’s about storing data to keep us safe. Remember? Survival? The information of what happened to us in every moment is recorded and eventually integrated and stored for future reference. This is to also remind you to avoid all the mistakes you’ve already made that have hurt you. You know, like the time you accidentally touched that hot stove or oven? This past reference tells you, “Remember not to do that again because it really hurts! Unfortunately, it affects us emotionally too, when your brain reminds you that it’s dangerous to trust someone or fall in love again. And now, we might see possibility in the opposite. We may see that everyone is the possibility of someone who could hurt us, even when it hasn’t happened yet. Bringing this kind of possibility into a relationship from negative past experiences does its best to destroy any of that super yummy good possibility that I’m taking about. So… maybe not.
By now, I hope you are coming to the realization that it’s all programming. It’s the way we are designed and for very good reasons. But now that you know this, you can operate consciously by choosing what you are committed to rather than being on auto-pilot and thinking that there is something wrong with our design. The key is in consciousness. When you are conscious and in the NOW, there is no past. There is no future either. The future is just a projected past. Perhaps a better version of the past but the past, nonetheless. And with no past-past, and no future-past, you are present in the NOW. This is actually the only time that anyone really exists in life! All the other time you are just operating from “Brain Pattern” mode. Did you know that? When you are present, THERE IS NO PAST! There is just life and the freedom to live it consciously. This is when you have an access to possibility.
I’ve heard it said, that once you see a sunset, you rarely see a sunset newly again. But why on Earth would we not want to experience each and every sunset that we choose to enjoy? You see, the more you know, the less you wonder. The wonder of not knowing is what allows us to be continually alive in an experience for as long as possible before that portal closes and we are stuck, back in the box again.
To recap what I’ve said in so many different ways, previously… you experience possibility when you have an experience for which there is no or little past reference. Or in other words… something you don’t already know.ย So what makes us think we ever completely know something, anyway? What if we don’t? Think what would be possible then. Go on… give it a go!
So… back to Kristen and keeping alive the new romantic relationship I was talking about at the first of this post. What if Kristen never fully processed her new beau enough to reduce him to a snapshot of possibility from another time? What if Kristen looked on him as a never-ending mystery that would forever unfold? Wouldn’t that be amazing? I wonder… what would be possible? What if he did the same for her? Now that would be something!
Childlike wonder and awe is what encourages yummy possibility; living life as a fantastic mystery of not knowing.ย I wonder what’s going to happen next? The key in keeping possibility alive, is staying present. This is why some people enjoy high risk activities such as squirrel flying! They get the experience of being alive! With this sort of activity, can you really ever know that you are NOT going to die at some point while doing it? Some people view this as a “death wish.” But personally, I think it’s really a “life wish!”
And as with your loved ones. Keeping your living ones alive with your wonderment and complete amazement of them, goes a long way in never completely knowing them.
So, keeping the yummy possibility alive, while leaving the possibility of no possibility to yesterday, works! And remember, positive experiences build positive experiences. Negative experiences built negative experiences. Hmm.
So however this new relationship turns out for my friend, Kristen; whether this is her man forever or whether this is her man for now, it’s all good because the state of having what seems like no-possibility possibility,ย IS also an access to eventually having possibility again!
Very insightful post, Jade. Such great points about the human condition and a wonderful reminder that we can choose possibility and presence in our experiences and with the people we love. <3
Thank you, Crystal. ๐ It actually takes something to keep our experiences and loved ones “alive” to us. It takes generating presence on an ongoing basis. ๐ Thanks for reading and commenting!
We can never tell what is in store for us.
Harry S Truman
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Jade,
Thank you for consolidating the idea of living in the present & what a beautiful gift it is!
No Mistakes~;)
xOOx
You’re so welcome, Mowgli. It is a beautiful gift. Thanks for reading and commenting, too. ๐
Divine synchronicity’s are everywhere; the ego is blind to this but the eternal self sees all.
MCZ
Sure does, Mowgli. ๐
Portals of possibility unmaintained become portals of disappointment.
MCZ
Sure does. It’s all about our constantly generating that possibility space, which humans being aren’t automatically hardwired to do. ๐ On the bright side… it is eventually an access to more portals of possibility at some point, as well as life experience. Thanks for the update, Mowgli. ๐ Take care.
Your self worth is, will your effort benefit you? Is this someone who is willing to work at healing and progressing? The effort , in a relationship, must provide net gain. There must be a light at the end of the tunnel.
S&L Douglas
http://www.recover-from-grief.com/7-stages-of-grief.html
Beautiful post!!! This closely relates to how I have been feeling lately. I feel like I have been traveling through tunnels of possibility and for the first time in a long time, I feel excited about my future. I have had several ups and downs, but it really has taught me to look for opportunity and new experiences in everything I do. I feel like a child playing duck duck goose, waiting to be tagged in to life and then running towards opportunity. I am so curious as to where my choices will lead me and how people I know or have yet to meet will impact my life. Its the sense of not knowing that I love. I always thought I wanted comfort and security.. but what if I don’t? What if I want a life full of wonder and possibility?
I agree! What if you do? Yes, this post reminds me of you. ๐ Thanks for taking the time to read and post. ๐ Your duck duck goose is a great analogy. ๐
I’m trying to “live in the moment” more. And maybe use those rabbit holes for a new experience. One that I may not have picked otherwise. thanks for the insight
You’re certainly welcome, Amy. ๐
I just want to say thank you Jade โค๏ธ
I lost my best friend, my Dad, July 1st. I came across your website and want you to know you have been helping me through my grief tremendously. I read your posts daily, have read the books recommended, and I believe I will survive this. Thank you โโญ๏ธโโญ๏ธ
So sorry you lost your Dad, Christine. Hugs.
You will survive this for sure, but at times you might not think you can. It’s all part of it. ๐ The death of a loved one tends to show us who we are. You can do this, Christine. And you will do this with your Dad watching over you. :):) He is with you, always.
I’m glad my site is helping you. Blessing for a complete and peaceful healing. Thanks for reading. xoxo
Wow. That’s a wonderful ride you described. Now I have some extra possibility on how to experience possibility. You may never fully know someone, might as well consider them an unfolding mystery. Now that’s some tasty writing.
Best. Post. Ever.
Aw shucks, Eric! Thanks! ๐