“Aaron Knows”

It’s noted that people with a disability have greater spiritual abilities than those who don’t. It’s clear that Aaron is connected to his departed brother.

Aaron, Dustin and their father

Aaron, Dustin and their father

Pat writes:
“On Wednesday, Feb. 26 of this year, my autistic son, Aaron, was supposed to go on a class trip to NYC on the train. He loves train rides and had been looking forward to it. For some unknown reason, that morning, he had a major meltdown on the train platform that caused the whole class to miss the train. He simply refused to get on the train.”

“A week later, the news of the virus in NYC hit the papers. When I read the story, I thought, “Dustin.” That train would have been crowded with commuters and the virus. I know it was Dustin protecting him and his classmates. There was really no other reason Aaron would suddenly have that meltdown right there and them.”

“Then, about a month later, I needed someone to help me out by taking Aaron out on some rides, down to the shore. I contacted Alexis who works for his day program to see if she would be willing, since my eyesight is not good on long drives. She loves Aaron and was happy to take him the next weekend.”

Again, Aaron refused to go. He kept saying “No Alexis, No Alexis, With mommy.” I texted her and told her he wanted to be with mommy but I could not figure out why. He loves her. Interestingly, he did ask for Alexis to take him the following weekend on May 9 and May 10. When I texted her about it, she said she could not. She was feeling ill and her partner had the virus. Turns out, days later with some testing, she had it too.”

“I counted back from when Aaron had last been with her. It was 15 days. I did get him tested plus myself and we were both negative. Thank God. That weekend he kept saying “no Alexis” would have been a week before she got sick. She would have been contagious. Somehow, he knew. Dustin was protecting him.”

“And lastly, my hubby broke his hip on Jan.17. He went from being operated on to a rehab, back to the hospital three times, and back to rehab. He is not a good patient. He discharged himself against doctors order. The day before he came home, March 26, the rehab called me to tell me they had the virus breakout there. They assured me it was not in his area. The next day, March 27, he came home by ambulance against doctor’s orders. He is still home. Can’t walk with out a walker, he uses a wheel chair, can’t climb stairs or drive. Basically, he is house bound.”

“Besides being a big pain in my rear, I know he is safe. No virus. Normally, he would be driving around doing whatever. He does not watch what he touches or wear a mask. I know he would bring the virus home to me and Aaron. Dustin knows that too. I really think this was the only way Dustin knew how to keep him safe with the rest of us.”

Commentary- I asked Pat to write about Aaron, to show why Dustin’s protection of Aaron and his family is so very clear. In this commentary that Pat has written so well, it will become more obvious, than what I could comment on, why what Alexis wrote to Pat that, “Aaron knows” is true. It’s also important to note that people with some form of disability seem to have greater abilities than that of those who don’t.

Aaron, Dustin and their father

Aaron, Dustin and their father

Pat writes:
“Aaron is severely autistic. He is 6′ 6″, 311 lbs. He has been classified mentally around age 5 or 6 years. He still believes in Santa Claus, the Easter Bunny and Sesame Street. He loves game shows and long rides in the car. He is basically non verbal but does talk in words… not complete sentences. He can read and write. He taught himself at age 2 by watching Sesame Street. When I can not understand him, he will write it down for me.”

“Aaron is very schedule prone. Everything must follow in order. He is very much like the Rain Man movie with Dustin Hoffman in it. When his schedule for the day gets interrupted, he will meltdown like a 2 year old. Aaron also will run if he sees something he likes. He is very fast. He will take off if he sees a tv in a store so that he can change the channel. He has taken off in blizzards because he wanted a Slurpee from 7 Eleven. If he needs a bathroom, he just runs. One minute he is behind you. The next he is gone. He has no fear of traffic or heights. He is very sweet basically. Like my big Baby Huey.”

“He also has a memory like none I know of. He remembers everything. Like this year, he refused to go on a trip to the Cape May Zoo. He said, “bumble bee.” Apparently, he was stung by a bee on a class trip on August 24 in 1999. He can give you dates, events and times that are important to him. Even down to the year they happened. He can also say the Alphabet backwards and knows every show on tv…what time, day and channel. He is a walking TV Guide.”

“I do remember the last day Alexis was with Aaron, she took him to her place. She went to the FaceBook wall and sent me some pics of Aaron and Dustin together that he had posted. I remember that she texted me… “Aaron Knows.”  I thought to my self… “of course he does.” He remembers Dustin and all the places they went together.”

“I wonder if those images mentioned early in this post, were a way of reminding Aaron of Dustin. It was the following weekend he refused to go out with Alexis which was so strange. I wonder if Dustin told him not to go? I think so. Aaron was adamant about not going out with her. Flat out refused. I never saw him like that before. That was the weekend she was contagious but did not know yet she had the virus.”

Dustin

Dustin

“Enter Dustin. The three of us always took day trips together. We have taken bus trips to the Bronx Zoo, NYC China Town, Philadelphia, PA Cobbler’s Village, boat rides, train rides etc. Mainly, the three of us because my hubby hates trips anywhere other than casinos. We also have gone to shows and plays. Dustin watched out for Aaron. If Aaron decided to run after something, he would grab Aaron and bring him back. He loved Aaron. In turn, Aaron would always hug him and pat his head. That is how he shows affection. It was Dustin and myself who chased him down the street in 3 feet of snow during a blizzard. Cops came, ambulance called and even then he jumped out of the ambulance. He wanted his Slurpee. No stores were open. I thank God that Dustin was always there to help.”

“When Dustin died in the car accident, Aaron seemed unaffected. He did see the obituary. He did go to the memorial. We all wondered how he would react. It was not until the first Thanksgiving without Dustin that I knew why. We went out to dinner at the same place we always did every year. This year there was three of us.The fourth chair at the table was empty. During the dinner, Aaron said “Dusty” and looked at the empty chair and then went back to eating. I knew he saw Dustin. I had a lot of signs from Dustin that evening, but this was the first time Aaron had said his name. Being childlike as Aaron is, he still sees his brother. The rest of us have been programmed into adulthood not to. He has mentioned Dusty a few times after also. I am sure Dustin is in contact with Aaron. There is no doubt about it.”

“I feel Dustin around me always. But Aaron has that special connection with his brother that only a child can have. He is extremely upset about this virus. His program is shut down, no events to go to and he is bored. I try to explain to him people die from this. We have to stay home. But how do I explain dying to someone who sees his brother and hears his brother talk to him. His brother is still here even though he died. So is that so bad?”

9 thoughts on ““Aaron Knows”

  1. Wow Pat, this is Kathy of Rich and Kathy. My Mom was recently placed in Hospice at a long-term facility for Stage 4 endometrial cancer and a partially blocked common bile duct, both inoperable. This was the end of January and the doctors thought the end was soon. Well, my IronMom, 94 yrs old, not only is alive right now, but got infected with Covid virus at the facility and has never had any symptoms. My 52 year old autistic brother John lives with her…my Mom’s house is 3 minutes away from me. He realizes that when Mom “goes to heaven” he will be living with Kathy. Meanwhile, since he has all his timed schedules and rituals that you described, I have let him stay at Mom’s house. (let’s face it, with Mom’s vascular dementia, he was running the show when she was there). Then and now, I am there 4 times a day, including 10:30 p.m. when I say his prayers with him and make sure all the appliances are turned off. There are a lot of similarities between your Aaron and my John, but that is inherent in autism. Throughout the years John has gotten smarter and better. I will of course inherit John, and I am so blessed that he will be with me. He is a sweet gift from God. When my Dad died 15 years ago, John did not shed a tear (have never seen him cry), looked sad and pointed up that Dad was in heaven. At night when he says his prayers he always includes Dad and Rich and my dogs…so sweet. Thank you for sharing your story. I believe that your Dustin was indeed protecting you all from the virus. Oh yeah, John prays that “all the virus people get better”. I just love and am amazed how our loved ones are truly around us all the time. Bless you and stay safe.

    • These special people are gifted. I think their innocence is one reason they can connect to the next life. Dustin is with him and he knows it. It does present a challenge on how to explain this virus to him. Telling Aaron he can get the virus and die does not bother him. That is because he has Dustin still with him so what is the big deal about dying? They don’t have the fear that has been programmed into us . They know life continues. That is something Dustin has had to teach me. Aaron already knows that. I think we are the ones who are blessed to have these people in our lives. We can learn so much from them.

  2. Sara Sabol on said:

    I really enjoyed reading these beautiful and inspiring stories about Aaron and Dustin! Thank you Pat and Jade! Big love! ❤️

    • When something unexplained happens, I found that Dustin is usually behind it. Both meltdowns Aaron had could not be traced to anything . They came out of the blue. Then Dustin always pops into my head. I know it is him protecting us. There was a time I would just shrug everything off as coincidence. Not anymore. When Dustin first died, it took me close to a year to figure out all the signs I was getting were not coincidence but Dustin. He must have been jumping through hoops in the next life trying to get my attention. Now I know when he comes into my head, he is behind it. God bless him.

  3. Michele Callos on said:

    Hello Pat! Although my daughter & I have not lost a friend of the family (Dusty) I cannot speak to the heartbreak y’all went through. My daughter has mild CP & has gone through 12 brain surgeries. She too can remember dates, years, songs! She speaks to her Aunt/my baby sister & to her stepdad! Aaron has an angelic way about him like my Amber does! Amber also goes to a Dayhab Center & she is going crazy in her group home being isolated. She is the same about routines. Mess that io & OH BOY!
    When we unexpectedly lost my sister & my husband, Amber was so calm about losing them. I of course cried all the time, but she would come over to me, hug me & say, ‘Momma it’s all gonna be ok & you can cry & I’ll be right here for you’!
    Your experience touched my heart so much! Nice to know there are more kids out in the world like my Amber!
    Aaron is a very special boy & is my Amber, your a very lucky Momma❤️❤️❤️ God surely blessed us both❤️

  4. These kids (I call them kids because mentally that is what they are) are so innocent. They have that special connection to the spiritual realm that we have lost growing into adulthood. Amber sounds like a sweetheart. This virus is taking a big toll on these kids. It is so hard to explain to them. This is when they need their mommy the most. Their whole world has been turned upside down. We are all they have left that is stable. Who else do they have to turn to? I would not be surprised if Amber could see into the future and know everything would be ok when you lost your sister and husband. She too probably saw them and knew they were happy and fine on the next level. Something that is hard for us in the midst of grief to see. God bless Amber and Aaron for being with us to help us pull through in our time of sorrow.

  5. Crystal on said:

    Thank you for sharing Jade! Pat, I love hearing about Dustin and how your family stays connected to him always. I love your openness to him and how that allows him to come in and watch over you all. And it sounds to me like Aaron and his abilities have truly been a gift in this uncertain time.

  6. Dustin sounds like a loving Brother, with a big heart. 🙂

  7. I love this, What a fascinating and heartwarming story. Thanks Jade and Pat.

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