When a powerpoint, “The Present” arrives in an email for Christmas, Margaret’s mother is forced to believe that this was sent from her deceased husband, Arthur.
“My Dad passed away on September 21, 2015. Although he was 85 years old, it was sudden and unexpected. We were extremely close and I was/am devastated.”
“My Mom was a rock after my Dad died. She seemed to be busy tending to things like canceling Dr.’s appointments, writing letters, sorting through things, etc. I wondered what would happen when there was nothing further to do. She is a very strong woman and far less emotional than I am.”
“Christmas was difficult and when I called her, she seemed sad on that day, although she was doing her best to put on a good front, trying to comfort me. There was just something different that day and although she would never admit it, I could sense it. I miss my Dad every day, but Christmas seemed even harder. He was everything to me.”
“I called my Mom a couple of days after Christmas. She asked if I had checked my email. I said, “no why?” She said, “Brace yourself. I got an email from your Father today!” She then proceeded to tell me she had forwarded the email to me, but for me to wait until I got home from work to read it. When I got home I read it. It was sent directly from my Dad’s gmail account to my mom’s hotmail account! It was a beautiful power-point video called, “The Present.” It had not been forwarded from anyone else and no one else was copied on it. When my dad sent something like that in the past; a nice poem, a saying or something interesting, he would send it to my mom, me, my brother, my daughter and usually some other family and friends. I don’t believe his email was hacked or it would have gone to everyone in his contacts. I truly believe it was a message via ADC from my Dad directly to my Mom.”
“The message in the video was so appropriate, it was crazy. We then got the message from my Mom when she forwarded it, but I truly believe that my dad sent that message to my Mom to comfort her and let her know he is ok. Even though, in a sense, I received the message “second hand” via my Mom. I was greatly comforted by it and thought it was so typical of my Dad, knowing we were having a particularly hard time, to send a message.”
“My Mom is a devout Catholic and was struggling a little bit with it at first, trying to figure out how it was possible, etc. I told her my Dad wanted her to have the message and the mechanics of it really are insignificant. There is no explanation other than my Dad somehow sent her that message. I think she is feeling better about it now and has found comfort in it, but at first, she was a little “freaked out” and really didn’t tell anyone about it. On the other hand, I have shared it with my friends and co-workers and all of them think it is fantastic and that it was definitely a message from my Dad.”
Although this email’s presentation was originally in the form of a power point with this song, “You Needed Me” by Anne Murray, playing in the background, for the sake of not having to change each page, it has been turned into an automatic presentation for viewing ease.
Commentary- Although we don’t understand the mechanics of how these extraordinary after-death communications happen, it doesn’t change the fact that they do. You see, as Earthlings, we have limited knowledge and comprehension of how these miracles work because of our limited viewpoint. I think it’s important to mention that they happen, and this is whether we believe they could or should. And although they don’t happen all of the time, (at least ones so obvious as the after-death communication that Margaret’s mother received), when they do happen, they not only provide proof of an afterlife, they can be quite extraordinary life-altering experiences that provide great healing.
Margaret points out the different grieving styles between her and her mother. It is common for people to think that everyone grieves somewhat the same, even in the same family circle. What’s true is that everyone, including those within the same family, has their own way of dealing with loss. It’s a complicated issue. While some can seem to be strong about it, others can be seen crying their eyes out. What we don’t always see is what goes on in the quiet hours, when one is alone and away from the world’s view.
Some people grieve emotionally, some people grieve intellectually. There are those who have been raised to believe that showing any type of emotion, such as breaking down, is a sign of weakness and loss of control, and just don’t go there… at least not while we are in the room. There are others who cannot get in touch with their emotional side because they may be experiencing some emotional numbness at the time. Defense mechanisms can be powerful and very useful, when it comes to dealing with such tragedy. However a person seems to be grieving, it’s important to allow them the space to grieve how they will. What is important is to not make how someone grieves as wrong. The truth is… a person’s brain does whatever it does- for whatever reason, and it is not for anyone to say what works for anyone else, because grief is very complicated with many layers. Some people do not grieve until many years after the fact.
Margaret mentions that her Dad used to send this type of stuff; a saying, poem or something of this sort to family and friends. This is to demonstrate a comforting message to his family, that he is still the same as he always was. Now I write this because, through the years, I have received many emails from people who worry that the death of their loved one would somehow change them in a negative way. And worse… that their loved one may have lost their feelings of love and caring for them. As irrational as this thought may seem to some, these are just a few insecurities that the loss of a loved one drives up for those who are left behind. Although there may be some changes in the individual who has crossed over and has been illuminated with a greater perspective, I assure you that loss of love and caring for their loved ones or the changing into someone else or changing into someone who is less loving than they originally were in life… does not happen.
It’s always amazing how healing an after-death communication can be. We often think of the physical touch of a hug or hands stretched out to hold us when we are sad, as a great tool for healing. But healing can also come to us by spiritual contact, as well. And this email from Margaret’s Father did just the trick! It helped and healed a distraught daughter who loves and misses her Father, very much.
“My dad was an amazing man. He had a great sense of humor, was loved by everyone that knew him, kids, elderly and everyone in between. He made everyone he met feel special without trying to. He was the most unselfish person I have ever known. He volunteered with many organizations and was devoted to his family. I think the reason I am trying to give you a brief description of him is because if you knew him you would know that it would be so like him to be worried about us and to try and reassure us that everything is ok. I am blessed to be his daughter and I believe he is always with me, just in a different way now.”
Margaret writes about another after-death communication relating to her Father:
“My husband has liver cancer and has been sick for a long time. He is under the best medical care at the University of Miami. We were at U of M meeting with the transplant team for his initial appointment for a transplant. I had talked to my mom a couple of days prior. She had mentioned getting my Dad’s death certificate (we had assumed he died of congenital heart failure, because they called her and asked if they should resuscitate). She said, “Yes,” but they were not able to save him. Turns out, the “official” cause of death listed on his death certificate was sepsis.”
“While my husband and I were in the examining room waiting for one of the next doctors on the transplant team to come in, the previously dark computer screen in the room lit up with a sort of free form red heart on the left of the screen and the word “Sepsis” also in red on the screen. It was so random but I immediately felt my dad was letting me know he was with us. The screen went dark again and a doctor came in and started typing my husband’s information into the computer.”
“My Dad was hospitalized with a urinary track infection and was on antibiotics and we thought he would be home in a few days. My daughter was with him on Sunday the day before he died and said he was telling her that I was going to need her help with my husband (her Dad). I hadn’t gone into detail with my Dad about the tumor they had found recently on my husband’s liver, but when I talked to him that day, he asked me about it. Shortly after he died, we got that first appointment with the transplant team. If my mom hadn’t told me the cause of death was sepsis I probably never would have thought twice when I saw that pop up on the computer screen in the examining room. It was just a strange coincidence and I felt he was with us. I’ve learned that grief is a process. Some days hurt more than others.”