Ryan’s Scent

In a series a back and forth emails, Melanie writes about some of her most pressing questions and concerns regarding her son’s passing.

Melanie writes:
“My son, Ryan, passed away September 22, 2013. Before his viewing and services, I 
saw his face each day in the clouds. After his services, on October 2, 2013, he was cremated, and I have not seen his face in the clouds since.”

“One night, I was sitting, looking at his picture – just a crying. A scent came on my hands of him… of what he smelled like in the casket. It didn’t last long. About a week later, I was going to bed, and I noticed this odor was on my pillow when I went to lay down. I noticed this odor being much stronger than before. The following night, I got up around midnight to use the bathroom. I didn’t notice any odor then. It wasn’t until I entered my room again that I smelled the odor of many musty roses that filled my room. It lasted longer than any odor that has come. I knew this scent was different, but did not know why. Since that night, no odor has come again. I felt good knowing it was my son, but now I feel like he has gone and never to return to see me. Can this be?”

In an email back to Melanie, I answer:
“Your after-death-communication is beautiful. Your son wants you to know that he is trying to comfort you. Personally, I don’t think our loved ones can ever be gone; they are just without a physical body. I’ve found that they want us to adapt to living our life without them. Because we are in two different dimensions, it just makes it more practical. They want us to focus on our lives and not give up because of our loss and grief. Melanie, I believe that your son will always be with you, even when there is no direct evidence of him. He will guide you through your life. Could love do anything differently? It is our love that connects us together – despite our differing worlds or bodies. I’m sure you have not seen the last of your precious son. Look for him in your dreams!”

In two subsequent emails a short time later, Melanie writes:
“I have been visited by my son again. I smell his odor and it is sometimes quite strong. I am still not sure where the strong odor of roses in my room came from though, as it has not come back since.”


“He was here with me yesterday as his scent was so strong and it brightened my heart knowing it was him. Me and my son were so very close, even more than any of my other children. He was my rock and my shoulder to cry on when needed.”

In emails that followed, I answer some of Melanie’s most pressing questions.

“Not wanting to bother you, but I had some question to ask in hopes you may be able to help me with?”
Q) Because I have been visited by my son does this mean he is not at rest yet?

A) No. It does not mean your son is not at rest. I am sure he is. Your son loved you, right? He is still loving you from beyond. Wouldn’t you do the same for him, if you could? Love is love. Your bond together continues on. He is trying to show you that he is still around. He is trying to comfort you the best way he can.

Q) When he visits and I smell the odor of him, I call out his name and he will suddenly go away. Why does this happen? If I do not call out his name he stays a bit longer. I am lost on this happening.

A) I’m not exactly sure about this question, but it could be that when you smell his odor, you are using a less physical part of yourself. (A spiritual part, in other words) Then, when you call his name out into the physical plane, you are accessing more of your physical senses and the spiritual part subsides. To be able to connect with the deceased at all is using your awareness beyond the 5 physical senses. You must be quite intuitive. When it happens again, just silently enjoy the visit for as long as it lasts. 🙂

Q) Does my son know how much his loss has done to me, what my feelings are and how much I miss him?

A) Yes. Your son is still very connected to you. I’m sure your son does know your thoughts and feelings. I believe this is the reason why he is trying to comfort you. He does not want to leave you when you are in your deepest stages of grief. Personally, I don’t believe our loved ones ever leave us completely. Physical body or not, your son still has awareness. He is aware of you. Consciousness has no boundaries. Know that he is present.

“Jade, to be honest, I have had a few dreams and they have not been good ones. I dream about the horrible ways he dies. Not sure why, as I never have that thought on my mind, nor did he die horribly, but the dreams are bad ones. I do not understand that. I only had one good one. We were walking towards heaven in the clouds and Ryan was a very small child holding my hand as we walked. That was right after his funeral”.

“Melanie, I wouldn’t worry about the bad dreams. I think they are your worst fears     presenting themselves – especially if they were not based in reality. But… the one about you and Ryan walking in the clouds… that for sure is an after-death-communication. I believe the message to you is that you will always be his mother, and he, your son, even after death. I know, it really is so hard to miss someone you love, but he is not so far away… A thought about him, in fact, is enough to get his attention.”  🙂

Melanie’s memory of her beloved son, Ryan.

Ryan was awesome! He had such a kind and forgiving heart. He loved so many with his loving heart; he was an all-around great man. He was the life of the parties; OMG, the things he would do to make you laugh. He was the family clown of us all. He could make you smile when you were at your lowest point. Ryan and I were so close. I have four children, but we were the closest. We could talk to each other and solve problems together. I could not have asked for a better child in him. He is greatly loved and missed.


Melanie and Ryan

Commentary- Sometimes, a loved one will try to communicate to us with a familiar scent. It can be most surprising. One minute it’s not there and the next moment it is. The scent can be subtle,  over-powering or somewhere in between. One thing is for sure, the scent has something to do with them. We wouldn’t expect to smell something that has no connection to our loved one and have it remind us of them, would we? So they would not normally do that. The roses Melanie smelled were most likely Ryan bringing his mother roses, since roses are a powerful symbol of the sweetness of God’s love. Roses are known to have an extremely high vibration; higher than any other flower essence.Throughout history, roses have been associated with miracles, angels and God’s essence; which is love.. 

Our loved ones will try to communicate with us in whatever way they can. But unless we are, not only intuitive, but clear enough to receive their transmission at the time, they have to use their energy in the best way they can to prove to us that they not only exist, but are still with us. It’s easy to think that the scent is just our imagination or that of an old memory of them, but often it comes out of the blue, without any thoughts to cause it.

With the lack of sure knowledge pertaining to the spiritual things between this world and the next, we are stretched to our emotional limits and we are often asked to rely on faith, which is a believing and trusting in the spiritual, without evidence of physical proof. Faced with the death of our loved one, struggling with what to believe, and considering the alternative, many courageously turn to sow seeds of faith in the face of no proof. They stop their resistance and turn their energy to the task of nurturing and cultivating those seeds until their faith grows strong and unshakable. This actually makes sense since learning to use and grow faith is an aspect of spiritual development, as well as a practice. How well we have developed our faith is also a measure of what peace we experience within our hearts, minds and souls. Proof is no longer an issue because of the surety of our inner or spiritual knowing. For, the more you build the muscle of faith, the more sure and peaceful you become. I call it grace; the ultimate surrender to trusting. And honestly, it take a lot of courage to fully go this way, but in doing so, you begin to notice that the more you believe – the more you perceive… and a new world begins to open up.

For those who become masters at unshakable faith, it’s not about IF they will ever see their loved ones again, it’s more about when. And, with every day that passes, we are all one day closer to crossing through the door beyond… to be with them again.

So, even though you may be experiencing darkness and sorrow at this time, remember to enjoy what light and joy there is while you are here. In the grand scheme of things, life is but a moment. For this too shall pass.

2 thoughts on “Ryan’s Scent

  1. It’s nice to hear of your visits from your Son, however brief.
    It’s been several years since my Mother passed, and I would enjoy a visit from her.

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