Don’t Wait to Appreciate

Back in the late 1980’s, I often took a road trip from Utah to visit California; my old stomping grounds. Traveling through the barren desert of Nevada, just outside of the mountain range exiting the Utah/Arizona Border, there was an extraordinary place someone once told me about with such excitement, that I had to stop and see it for myself. So, on one such trip, I finally did it. I exited the freeway at Homestead Road and found my way across the other side of the freeway to an area where this supposed “really cool place” existed like a paradisiacal mirage in the desert.

I parked my car on a dirt parking lot and walked toward the cliff that led down to the river that ran under the freeway overpass, to see what I could see. I saw it! Right before my eyes, it was as if this part of desert landscape, in this small desolate town, out of nowhere, turned into some sort of Garden of Eden! Continue reading

Is Suicide the Answer?

Since Raj’s tragic passing, Archana has been devastated enough to consider suicide. But this time, Raj asks her to promise to serve out her purpose without him.

Archana writes:
“Yesterday when I got up, I stood in front of God’s photo and said, “It’s enough, and I’m tired. Please take me back to you!”

“Even while talking to a friend at another time, I said, “I have no intention of living. Every day, I wake up hoping it should be the last day. But somehow, death is not ready for me yet.”

Godavari River

Godavari River. Across the river where Raj drown.

“Well, last night, I had a dream where I was at the river bank where Raj tragically drowned. In my dream, I was talking to a friend about how the tragedy happened. Then, to my surprise, Raj came walking up in the sand and sat down next to me. I smiled at him and asked, “When is my turn? I want to be with you.” He took my hand in his and said, “Promise me that you’ll not commit suicide.”

“I don’t remember what happened after that, but it felt good to know that Raj was listening to my words. Still… it’s really tough to take so much pain in one life.” Continue reading

At the Brink…

Just when Lara was at the brink of her capacity, she experienced this amazing near-death experience!

Lara writes:
“I was severely depressed at the time before my NDE. I had gotten into a car accident a year ago and suffered short term memory loss. My neck and back were also in a lot of pain and my left eye would twitch at times.”

“Family life was unbearable, dealing with school, mom’s chronic illness, dad’s neglect and gambling addiction, and brother’s focus on himself. My sanity and patience started to dwindle.”

“Weeks before my NDE, I wasn’t able to study for a college exam and was under extreme stress. My moods were up and down. The only way I knew how to cope with all the stresses in my life was through an eating disorder. I began to eat less and less and lost a lot of weight. My stomach was always in pain and I had no energy to do anything. I was very fatigued and hanging on by a thread.” Continue reading

What’s New for Spring 2016? (Announcement)

We all know that Spring is a time for many new beginnings, so I’m taking this opportunity to announce that, by popular request, I will be launching some brand new services soon. Aside from the many posts written throughout the years; designed to assist, comfort and support those who grieve, the tools provided on the site, and the commentaries to the many after-death communication, as well as other stories, I will now be offering:

Online Classes such as, the “Being Your Own Medium” series, “Navigating the Emotional Waters of Grief” series, “The Phoenix: Finding Your Life’s Purpose in the Ashes” series, “Finding Strength Beneath the Surface”, “Healing Your Past”, “Have I Lived Before? Past Life Regression” series, as well as… many more online classes to come. To keep updated on the classes being offered, please refer to “Classes” on the homepage navigation bar for further information. Continue reading

50 Shades of Grief (Process)- Explained

“50 Shade of Grief (Process) Explained”, is a detailed explanation of the gradual evolution of the many emotional and mental states we have the possibility of passing through, as we travel on the road to grief recovery. Keep in mind, no two grievers are the same; some will visit all of these stops, while other grievers will experience just some of them.

Grieving is a very personal journey. It is also wise to mention, that although there is an order of emotional and mental states to experience, grief can happen in any order. What is common though, is that the first part of this chart is experienced before the last part of the chart. 

In the end… this chart represents a successfully completed, grief recovery journey; starting from entering into the long tunnel of darkness… and exiting out the other end; into the light. Continue reading

50 Shades of Grief (Process)

“50 Shade of Grief (Process)” shows the gradual evolution of the many emotional and mental states we have the possibility of passing through, as we travel on the road to grief recovery. Keep in mind, no two grievers are the same; some will visit all of these stops, while other grievers will experience just some.

Grieving is a very personal journey. It is also wise to mention, that although there is an order of emotional and mental states to experience, grief can happen in any order. What is common though, is that the first part of this chart is experienced before the last part of the chart. 

In the end… this chart represents a successfully completed, grief recovery journey; starting from entering into the long tunnel of darkness… and exiting out the other end;  into the light.

Blessings on your sacred journey. May you find peace and complete healing at the end of your tunnel.

(Dedicated to the memory of Christian who crossed over on, March 31, 2010, just six years ago today. We love and miss you dearly.)

Companion to- 50 Shade of Grief (Process) Explained    (Click image to enlarge)

A meme which documents the grief process from Shock to Rebirth

A meme which documents the grief process from Shock to Rebirth

Awakenings Through Loss

When our loved ones pass away, they leave gifts in their place. It’s for us to discover and use these treasures toward transforming ourselves and our lives.

In the post, The Terrifying Last 18 Days, Keisha describes the grueling final days of her mother’s life and her emotional reactions to it. Sometimes, the course of a person’s health, with its ups and downs, can be quite the emotional roller-coaster ride. Just when Keisha thought her mom was going to live through her medical procedures, her situation took a turn for the worst, leaving Keisha and other loved ones to cope with her eventual passing. 

It is not uncommon for the loss of a loved one to create a space for an awakening to happen. When I read something that Keisha had written in reference to one of my other posts, See How You Are?, I could clearly see that Keisha had been privy to such an awakening.  Continue reading

Experiencing Is Believing

In this after-death communication and out-of-body experience, Linda becomes a believer in the “afterlife” when her son, Erik, meets his mother in another dimension to reassure her of his continued love AND life.

Linda writes-
“Let me first say that before I had this experience, I would not have believed it truly could happen. I had really never heard of such a thing before this.”

Erik and Camaro“My 24 year-old son, Erik, passed away over 2 years ago. Not long after he died, when my husband and I were deeply grieving, Erik came to me in a dream. I saw him standing there and held out my arms to him expecting him to disappear, but he didn’t!  I told him I love him so much and hugged him. It felt like I was actually hugging him! There was a light around him as if he was standing in a soft spotlight. We talked for a short time, but unfortunately, I am not sure of our exact words, although it felt comforting, I do remember that as we were talking, I was rubbing my thumb softly against his cheek and I still remember the sensation of it. He then said he had to go. Before he disappeared, I asked him if it was nice where he was. He smiled a little smile, as if he knew something I didn’t,  and said, “Yes, it’s nice. It’s very nice.” Then the dream was over.”

Continue reading

What is it Like to Lose a Child?

In this heart-wrenching post, Rebecca answers this unthinkable question, What is it like to lose a child? After having him for 23 years, Rebecca lost Kenny on July 6, 2012. She has been working through her grief ever since. One day last summer, she found the website, Quora, and saw, of all questions in front of her… this one. There it was… Rebecca’s invitation to share her most private and deepest thoughts and feelings with all the world. 

Quora asks: What is it like to lose a child?

Rebecca’s reply:
“This is a tough question to answer as it brings all the pain I try to push back (he’s just on a long vacation; he’s busy with work, etc., AKA denial) with as much force as I can muster, until I’m lying in bed alone with my thoughts, trying to hold on to every detail I can about him. The fear of forgetting his voice one day drives me insane.” 

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You’ll Never Walk Alone

In this after-death communication, Sadgunnan sends an important message to Sanjita, via bumper sticker!

Sanjita writes:

“Last Sunday I met Sadgunnan’s brother and we went hiking together. I feel so happy around him. He reminds me so much of his brother.”

Sanjita's best friend, Sadgunnan“This evening around 7 pm, I was thinking a lot about Sadgunnan while driving. I was talking to myself and thinking, “I wish he was here with me.” Then the tears began to fall again.”

Continue reading

If I Never Carve a Pumpkin

Facing the upcoming holidays without Brian, who passed one year ago, Valley writes a tender poem for her beloved son.

For BrianIF I NEVER CARVE A PUMPKIN
Love, Mom

If I never carve a pumpkin
or trim a Christmas tree,
It won’t make me miss you less,
You’ll still not come back to me.

When I listen to Holiday music
And feel grief replaced with joy,
I fear I rob my memories
of you, my little boy.

But my fears are only that
because your spirit’s here with me.
Your imprint on my life
safe in every memory.

BrianSo I’ll honor our traditions
of which you’re still apart.
I’ll be your memory keeper.
Forever in my heart.

To read more about Brian, see the post, Don’t Worry Mama

May I Have This Dance?

In this after-death communication, devoted husband, Carl, visits his beloved wife, Mary Ann, through shoulder taps, hugs, his reoccurring initials, “CH” and a hill-side smiling house.

Scan 4

Carl and Mary Ann

Mary Ann met Carl when she was fifteen-years old. Leaving the church bazaar one night with their mutual friend, Debbie, there he was, standing outside the subway station in Chinatown. It was dark and difficult to see, but Carl still managed to get Mary Ann’s telephone number.

When he called her, she asked, “It was so dark that night, what made you think you would like the way I looked?” Jokingly, sixteen-year old Carl teased, “I thought I’d take my chances!”

They clicked immediately. The phone calls between them lasted hours at a time. And, at some point early on, Carl found himself deeply in love with Mary Ann and pressed her for her love in return. Mary Ann queried, “I’m fifteen, what would I know of love?” Carl was her first steady boyfriend. It was only after a 2-3 week break-up of missing Carl in her life that Mary Ann realized just what love is… and it was the way she felt for Carl! After getting back together again, their love blossomed. And from that time on, they were solid and inseparable! Continue reading

The Train

This was sent in by Pat, who recently lost her son, Dustin. I think it’s a great perspective. When you are in the deepest pain of your grief, it is hard to see that death is every bit a part of life, as life is. And, they are still living… just beyond our awareness. And one day… we will live with them again. 

The Train

Passenger_TrainAt birth we boarded the train and met our parents, and we believe they will always travel on our side.
However, at some station our parents will step down from the train, leaving us on this journey alone.

As time goes by, other people will board the train; and they will be significant i.e. our siblings, friends, children, and even the love of your life.  Many will step down and leave a permanent vacuum. Others will go so unnoticed that we don’t realize they vacated their seats.
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Going Rouge

Chris’s transformational journey from being an addict… to his eventually  recovery. 

Chris was a nice church-going youth when he took his first drink at 18. It wouldn’t be long before he found himself in a downward spiral of substance abuse, just a few years later.

Right from the start, Chris’s father was an angry dad. Far too many times, Chris and his brother took the brunt of his anger with his bullying and physical abuse. Complaining of their aches and pains, it was common for Chris to see his parents going for the pain pills to take away their misery. But after years of neglect and abuse at the hands of his father, Chris had his own suffering to relieve.

Chris moved quickly through the drugs; trying whatever was available to him at the time. To spite his parents, he departed from the straight and narrow life they had planned for him. He was on crank by the time he was 20. He liked the speedy feeling it gave him. Sometimes, needing a quick fix that he was unable to get other places, Chris dared to sneak some of his parent’s pills, or his grandparents pills; popping Lortab and snorting Oxycontin. By the time Chris was 23, he was addicted to meth. High on meth, he would go 3 to 4 days without sleep. He took drugs because he didn’t like who he was while sober. Whatever he used, he always used it with alcohol. Time would eventually reveal that no matter what substances were involved, alcohol was his true drug of choice!
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