Moving Forward After Loss

In a moment of deep sorrow, Lynda’s departed husband, Jason, compassionately reminds his beloved wife, that he is not his ashes. 

Lynda writes:
“Last summer, I went to my cabin where I left Jason’s ashes. That’s where he loved to be. I had not seen them since I put them in the box the year before. I usually just hug the box they are in, but this time, I had a desperate need to see and feel his ashes through the plastic. I was hoping it would give me some closure. I miss him very much.”

“The first night, I sat and watched a movie with the bag on my lap. It was very comforting. The next day, I found myself hugging the bag of Jason’s ashes and crying. I kept telling myself, “It’s not him” and that I needed to let go of his physical remains. Then, I heard a voice in my head repeating, “It’s not ME!” This seemed odd, as I had ME, telling myself that it was not HIM. It was so clear that I immediately felt it was Jason, and he was with me, and affirming all this, which was very comforting. I still can’t bring myself to spread Jason’s ashes yet, but have been thinking about it.”

“I’ve also spent a lot of time clearing out my garage and basement. I kept getting a tingling on the back of my neck that makes me shiver really hard. I have never experienced that before. I talk to him a lot there, and it is a comforting feeling.”

Commentary- It’s coming up on two years since Lynda’s beloved husband, Jason, crossed over from this world to the next. Although she’s spent time grieving, Lynda’s pain is still fresh, as she continues to work her way through the many layers of loss and grief.

Although she somehow manages to carry on, her life is much different now. She spends her days keeping busy, as this staves off the relentless pain still lying beneath the surface. She misses Jason deeply, as he will always have a special place in her heart, mind and soul.

Having the need for some closure, Lynda went to her cabin to hold Jason’s ashes. There… she put them on her lap, she held them, she hugged them as she cried and expressed to him her feelings of love and loss. So, it is no surprise that, upon perceiving this, Jason compassionately chimed right in, to remind his beloved that the ashes she was focusing on, were neither him, nor where he resides. For sure, Jason was with his wife in her struggle that day, and for sure, he heard her pleas and tried to comfort her.

Although we may have physical remains to hold, whether they be ashes, clothes or other material remnants once owned by the departed, and they provide some comfort, to have and hold for a while, there is also something very sad about having these remains, while knowing they can never replace what was lost. But we hold them nonetheless.

Lynda still holds onto Jason’s remains, that’s okay, there’s no rush. When the time is right to let go of his remains, she will know and it is only for her to say. When one is in the midst of a grief cycle, there is no such thing as just being able to move on. That would imply skipping the vitally important steps that could get one over the bridge of chaos and upheaval to one’s eventual healing. There is no moving on, there is only moving forward. And sometimes, it’s one step forward, two steps back. But nevertheless, go through the steps with grace, whatever they are for each individual, and only move to the next step when completely ready. If this step of the process is pushed too fast, the result might be adding additional emotional grief, such as guilt and regret, unnecessarily heaped on an already painful set of emotions to work through. 

 Lynda mentioned experiencing a tingling feeling of being touched while she worked in her garage and basement. This was not Lynda’s imagination and is something commonly felt, if one is attuned to feeling it. When a spirit touches you, it is their actual energy field that is making contact with yours. When this happens, there is no mistaking it, as it is strong enough to get your attention. It could feel like a bug is on your skin, that you may try to brush away, yet, there is no bug in sight. The spirit touch has the sensation of a soft energetic electrical field, hence the tingling. You can even stare at it while it is happening and see nothing, but the feeling of this amazing contact of warmth and love is definitely prominent. This type of spirit touch is to inform you that your loved one is with you. 

For a few days, while I was corresponding with Lynda about some of the details of her post, she informed me that, after all this time being reluctant about spreading Jason’s ashes, just yesterday morning, she started to get the strong feeling that she would be able to do it soon. Her intuition showed her a particular time and place and the people who would be gathered. As it would happen, family will be in town at such a time. If Lynda is indeed ready at this time, it would be a great time, for those who love him, to celebrate the life and afterlife of Jason. If she’s not ready yet… then, she can always change her mind.

Hmm, though, it does seem that Jason could be involved with this inspired thought, and prompting Lynda. I’m certain of this, because… also in our correspondence, I was telling Lynda that when I work on a post, I am so focused on that departed loved one, Jason, in this case, that many times, they will show up in some way, shape or form, by giving me a direct empathic experience, an insight of understanding or even direct messages channeled through me for the bereaved.

So… later, when I wrote about the part where Jason repeatedly told Lynda in her head, “The ashes are not ME”… surprisingly it happened. A message in the form of a Valentine’s Day poem from Jason came through my mind and hands as I typed it out. As it turns out… Jason is a poet. For Lynda, he writes…

“I am not my ashes, they are no longer me.
I am much more now, than I could ever be.
I’m not confined to places, as I am all around.
But, always in your heart, dear, is where I can be found.”

One of life’s greatest miracles is that it is possible for us to eventually and completely heal from the deepest devastating pain that can so brutally upended our lives. It’s miraculous that we can move forward from our losses with our love for each other, intact; Lynda on the physical side, Jason on the spiritual. They still continue to have the bond of love for each other, as death has not upended that.

And although the remains of our departed are important for a time, the greater version of them is boundless and can never die. In this world of short-term pain and tears from our losses, it is the long-term view of hope and strength that will take us through to the rest of our lives, until through tears of joy, our love will reunite us once again.


Heart Image:Pixabay

Life’s Unusual Circumstances

When Elisa and Nancy separately make investments in the same stock, at around the same time, Elisa suspects that Eric is guiding them from beyond.

Elisa writes:
“I dreamt of Eric last night, after so long. It was in an office setting, but not my old office. When I arrived, I saw that he was in his office and I went to mine, waiting for him to call, as I saw that he was busy writing. But he looked at me and his face was so clear and vivid.”

“Then, he came to my office, kissed my head and left.” Continue reading

The Consolation From Loss

On the day of Michel’s memorial of spreading his ashes in the forest in France, Joanna wonders how her beloved husband would give her a sign.

Joanna writes:
“We had just finished spreading Michel’s ashes in the woods at the same tree in France where Michel’s brothers ashes are. I had been asking for a sign from Michel that day but had no idea what he could scare up in the middle of the forest. But he delivered!” Continue reading

Eclipsing Life

As the moon passed over the sun in August’s eclipse, my cousin, Craig, peacefully eclipsed this life.

Throughout his adult life, my cousin, Craig, had his share of health issues, stemming from Cancer, to Lyme’s disease, to Multiple Sclerosis. Being a Scientist, whether it was a macrobiotic diet or something else he tried, he always found ways to either heal, or at least keep these diseases at bay. But, later on in his life, Craig came to experience complications from some of these debilitating diseases that left him struggling and unable to overcome.

It was February of 2017 when things took a turn for the worse. Craig came down with an infection that he couldn’t shake. The writing was on the wall. His loved ones knew his inevitable passing was closing in on both, him and them. Continue reading

Shedding a Tear

As Shenique and her son say goodbye to their beloved husband and father at his viewing, he says goodbye back to them in the most unexpected way.

Shenique writes:
“Have you ever heard of a dead man crying for real? Well, it has been 8 years since my husband was killed. At his viewing, when my son and I said our last goodbyes, a tear came from my husband’s left eye. It was clear as day! Would you happen to know the meaning or what he was telling us?”

Commentary- Although it would seem unusual for a tear to fall from a departed loved one’s eye, stranger things have happened. The tear drop is a symbol of emotional expression. In this case, some messages of expression could be, “I’m sad my life ended so soon.” “This wasn’t supposed to happen this way.”  “I’m sorry you will have to go through the pain of this.” “I’m Sorry to Leave You.” “I’ll miss you and the life we had together, dearly.” and ” Goodbye for now.” Continue reading

Music As a Medium

Music is a common message medium from beyond. As Kathy looks for a sign, she receives these after-death transmissions from her beloved husband, Rich.

Kathy writes:
“In October of 2016 I was taking a class offered by Jade on “Becoming Your Own Medium”. The course was on a Friday night via conference call. I was sitting in bed with candles, phone, and ready for the class call. I remember one of the class participants saying that once in awhile she would ask for a sign from her loved one. So I thought, why not, and asked Rich, my deceased husband, to join us, as I had not received a sign in awhile. I fell asleep during the end of the class hypnosis.” Continue reading

Feathers From Our Angels

Three different women each receive the sign of a feather from the angel they love, who loves them too, and is watching over them from beyond. 

Sanjita writes:

Sanjita's Feather

Sanjita’s Feather

“Early on one Sunday morning, I found a little feather where I take shower everyday. It looks so awkward for the feather to be there because I live alone in my house. Secondly, the bathroom doesn’t have a window. Thirdly, the bathroom door is always closed after I use it and this is my first time seeing a little feather sticking on the bathroom wall.”

“The day before this happened, I was thinking about and talking to my departed best friend, Sadgunnan, because for so long there was no contact. I got busy with life and also, was traveling. As I spoke, I told him that I’m not sure where he is. Deep in my heart I was thinking if there is another moment, I wish I can see him or be with him just for a little while. I knew I was missing him and I told him to show me some signs that if he’s still around me. Usually he will come in my dreams, but to my surprise I saw a tiny feather at the bathroom the next morning. It’s impossible for any birds to fly in because there is no window in the bathroom.”

Spirit Hugs

Have you ever felt an actual spirit hug before? Ann sure did in this beautiful after-death communication from Rebecca, Ann’s beloved sister, from beyond.

Ann writes:
“My sister, Rebecca, died a horrific, heart-wrenching death at age 49. I’m an ICU nurse and understand death very well. However, it was how she died that was just killing me. I think part of my desire to continue to hear from Rebecca is that her death was the result of an unsuccessful suicide attempt in which her mouth and teeth were blown off. The failed attempt left Rebecca and her family to live with the aftermath of her choice for the next 6 months until Rebecca’s eventual passing.”

“What happened was so terrible and left Rebecca quite disfigured. After seeing her photo, I’m sure you will get it. She was beautiful. I still cannot think about Rebecca without thinking about how horrid and unsettling her death was.” Continue reading

Soul Mates

Lee loses her closest friend and soul mate, Mike, through suicide. However, despite her great loss, Lee is comforted to know that they are still connected.

Lee writes:
“I had only one friend I was very close to growing up. The way we met made me know right from the start that he was going to be important to me.”

“The night before I met Mike, I felt done, and just couldn’t go on anymore. I talked myself down and told myself to go one more day, that maybe it would get better. The next day was the school dance. I walked into the cafeteria to get a drink and everything in the room stopped. At the time it really freaked me out. I couldn’t hear anything… everything had just stopped! I looked across the room and there he was waving to me. We didn’t say a word to each other; no names, nothing until the next day. We both talked about how everything had stopped and talked about how weird it all was. We were inseparable from that point on. We were very close without trying.” Continue reading

They Really Do Hear Us!

A few days after posting Karen’s latest after-death communication from Marcus, Messages Through Meditation, she phoned me to report an interesting development.

Before leaving for work that morning, Karen and Marcus’s Aunt were texting back and forth about the story, Messages Through Meditation, I recently posted on this site. This was only a precursor for what was to soon come.



May is Marcus’s birthday month. It will be the second year since his untimely passing that Karen will not be able to celebrate his birthday with him. Back in October of 2015, sadly, Marcus ended up taking his life when he lost his battle with bipolar depression. Although Karen has forgiven him, of course, her loss is still difficult.

On her way to work this particular morning, Karen was talking to Marcus in the car. More specifically, Karen was stating her displeasure of having to live her life without him in it. Well, she told me, she might have actually been yelling a little bit too, as she asked “Why?” You see… Marcus was the love of Karen’s life. Continue reading

Still Here… 40 Years Later!

In this after-death communication, Kathi receives an auditory visit from her beloved brother, Kenny, who passed away 40 years prior. 

Kathi writes:
“My brother passed away in 1977 of a very rare disease. We were very close. After his death, I had many dreams of swimming in the ocean together, birds sitting and watching me, and twice of being escorted into a room somewhere in the heavens, where he was sitting in a chair waiting. I saw only from the waist up. We talked about family, life etc.” Continue reading

Messages Through Meditation

While meditating, Karen receives the image of a tannish-brown Canadian leaf and wonders how this sign will stand out among the other leaves of the fall season.

Karen writes:
“The other day I was meditating and trying to connect with my departed loved one, Marcus. Sometimes I will do this, and ask for a sign, and sometimes an image will appear in my mind. This particular morning, the sign that appeared was a leaf, like the shape of the Canadian Leaf. It was not red, but more of a tannish brown. I thought it was unusual and took it for what it was. I also thought it was funny because it was getting towards the end of summer and early fall, so leaves were pretty abundant. I was even joking with myself, “Yeah, that’s a good one; think of a leaf as a sign you’re going to see leaves everywhere. Pretty funny eh?” Continue reading

Clarity of the Infinite Soul

A heavenly visitor appears in the middle of the night to ask me some vital questions about what I believe and who I really am.

It was seven years ago today that Christian suddenly and unexpectedly passed, right before my eyes. Helpless to do anything about what was destined to be, I watched the horrifying scene with wet and disbelieving eyes, while I did my best to make him comfortable in his last moments of life.

Naturally, to anyone experiencing such a loss, every day and every night has the potential to become a living nightmare, as death, especially sudden and unexpected, can be quite traumatizing. Continue reading


My latest after-death communication from Christian occurs in the form of a “sighting.” Lynda and Shubhika share their sightings too.


sightings Pixabay Image

It was around Christmas that I had an unexpected surprise while riding in the passenger seat of a car headed to the store. As we drove en route to one store, passing by another one, it happened. It was dark outside but I just happened to casually glance out the car window into the well-lit store and saw Christian at the register! It really was Christian!

Clearly, I saw him. He was at the front of the store, talking and smiling. Christian was so friendly, he spoke and smiled at everyone. Continue reading

Mary Ann’s Flying Orb

This image was recently sent to me by my friend, Mary Ann, who had an after-Christmas tea with some friends.

The orb that was captured flying through space, appears over the right shoulder of Mary Ann. At first, she didn’t even notice it. A friend had to point it out. This is the case with most anomalies that appear in images. People miss them because their brain automatically filters them out, and/or discounts these anomalies as just something to do with the camera and lighting.

No doubt this is Carl, Mary Ann’s devoted husband, visiting from the “other side” to photo bomb their picture. You go boy!
For more about Mary Ann and Carl, see, May I Have This Dance?

Mary Ann's Orb

Mary Ann’s Orb