In Memoriam Of Christian

… whose life and untimely passing inspired the creation of this site.

In my heart, I bring you flowers.

In my heart, I bring you flowers.

It was three years ago to this day that Christian, just twenty-five years of age, suddenly and unexpectedly passed away from a hemorrhaged arterial vascular mass in his brain. Fortunately for him, the painful process that led to his death was short-lived, as the time from onset to his passing only lasted approximately 45 minutes.

Although the process of Christian’s painful death was quick, for the loved ones left behind, our painful experience of losing him was just beginning. Even though we were still alive, it was a kind of death for us made manifest in our attempts to live on without him.

Christian was an amazing contribution to this planet. His countenance radiated acceptance, patience and unconditional love. Whenever I got impatient or offended by someone’s words or actions, with the utmost of wisdom and compassion Christian would turn to me and say, “Choose love.” It was a bumper sticker he was referring to, one I picked up for him when I visited a Hindu Ashram in Taos, New Mexico, just 6 months earlier. But it was also who he was and how he lived his life.

Christian’s death was shocking to those who knew and loved him. The impact of this loss left many to wonder why this amazing light upon the Earth, would be taken at a time when the world needed light the most.
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Overcoming Fear- Facing Inner Demons

InnerDemonsThey’re Ba-ack! I thought I’d already sent them packing once and for all, but apparently they didn’t listen very well. One thing is for sure; they expect you to listen perfectly to them! That’s why they come to catch you in a weak moment… and cornering you within the confines of your own head, relentlessly recite your past mistakes to you; like you somehow weren’t already aware of them! They tell you why you should or shouldn’t have done what you did, followed by a judgment… or five about it! You know, those errors you made in the past when you were young and less experienced. Or… even just yesterday, when you were unaware and didn’t consider every other possible choice than the one you did, and because you didn’t, this left you in a bad spot.

Maybe you’ve noticed them before… those critical voices in your head, that, like the mob coming to extort, yet, another payment from you, badger you, sometimes in a soft and subtle way, and sometimes in a loud and abrupt one. But either way, it all ends the same… they want you to pay for something. Even if you have already paid before, they forget… or don’t care… and come back for more! Their favorite currency is in the form of your guilt, shame and regret. So, unless you are blissfully unaware, conscience-less and don’t care, or have already learned the secret to making them stop, then… welcome to this awesome human experience!

Throughout time, these disparaging voices have been referred to as, “the critical parent”, “the judge and jury”, “the committee”, or “inner demons”, just to name a few. And because they can be so damn mean, leave some convinced that these “mental tormentors” are really “outer demons”… as who would really do this to oneself?
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Lessons From the Geese

… a message about working together.

As each bird flaps it’s wings, it creates an uplift for others behind him. There is 71% more flying range in V-formation than flying alone.
Lesson: People who share a common direction and sense of common purpose can get there quicker.

Whenever a goose flies out of formation, it quickly feels the drag and tries to get back in position.
Lesson: It’s harder to do something alone than together.

When the lead goose gets tired, it rotates back into the formation and another goose flies at the head.
Lesson: Shared leadership and interdependence give us each a chance to lead as well as opportunities to rest.

The geese in formation honk from behind to encourage those in front to keep up their speed.
Lesson: We need to make sure our honking is encouraging and not discouraging.

When a goose gets sick or wounded and falls, two geese fall out and stay with it until it revives or dies. Then, they catch up or join another flock.
Lesson: Stand by your people in difficult times, as well as in good.

(Lessons from the Geese, was written in 1972 by Dr. Robert McNeish of Baltimore. Dr. McNeish, for many years a science teacher before he became involved in school administration, had been intrigued with observing geese for years and first wrote the piece for a sermon he delivered in his church.)

If we could all work together… just think about how much we could do, and how far we could go. The sky’s the limit when we’re united in cooperation!

The End Is Only The Beginning

My incredible out-of-body experience while attending a past-life regression seminar in 2010, in Denver, Colorado, as published in Dr. Brian Weiss’s new book, Miracles Happen.

I attended one of Dr. Weiss’s past-life regression seminars in 2010 in Denver, Colorado. Only seven months prior to this event, I lost my dear Christian to a sudden and unexpected death. It was the worst thing I had ever experienced and it left me a basket case, with so many painful thoughts and questions. At the same time, I had also spontaneously remembered a tragic past life with Christian, that had ended in a similar fashion, which left me feeling even worse.

Because I was so distraught about these losses, Christian’s aunt told me about Dr. Weiss and recommended that I go to an event, saying that maybe I would find some answers or at least feel better. I looked him up and read his books, and they gave me some peace of mind. But when I found out that he was going to be as close as Colorado, I took the opportunity to travel and attend his event. My experience there has helped me so much by changing my perspective.

My Actual Experience-
It was the first regression of the day after Dr. Weiss had introduced himself and prepared us for what might be expected and experienced within the context of our time with him. When he put us into a deep state of hypnotic regression, of course I expected to go into a past life, just as I had done times before while listening to his regression CD.

I remember that he had just come to the part where he gives the suggestion to go back to the earliest childhood memory, which I did. Like a child, I found myself in wonder and anticipation of the adventure I would soon discover when he took me back to a previous life. What past-life clues and remnants would I uncover? What would they teach me about my life and myself?
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